Hamartia (Book 1)
by jeanniedream
Summary: Beatrice Prior follows her brother to Erudite, but yearns for a different life. She meets Four after watching them all play Capture the Flag. When the attack on Abnegaton begins, who will Tris be able to trust? And will Four be able to trust her? Love, trust, heartache, and betrayal - it's all here. This is book 1 of a planned trilogy.
1. Chapter 1 Prologue

_I am seven and I have never been to a funeral before. I know very little of life, but I know we are Abnegation, and we die as we have lived –silent and bare, leaving nothing behind. On the table, in the center of the small room, something is wrapped in a gray burlap shroud, of the same material as our clothes. I know I'm supposed to be quiet. A basket is passed wordlessly among the people who have gathered. I see my mother take a photograph from her pocket and drop it into the basket. I stand on my toes to see inside but she passes the basket on too quickly. In the corner, a tall man stands with his arms crossed, watching the people who have come._

 _His eyes light on something and slowly narrow. He pushes his way through to the back of the room. There is a boy gripping a white handkerchief. The man, his father, kneels down in front of him. He offers no comfort. Instead, he slowly peels the small fingers back, one at a time. The boy tries to hides his face, but I can see it is red with the effort to hold on. As the handkerchief is wrenched away, his mouth opens, and it is as if he is crying out in pain, but no sound escapes him._

 _We are outside now, standing with our heads bowed, the contents of the basket are burning. Smoke wafts upwards into a cloudless sky. My mother has always said abnegation funerals are beautiful, that this is the last selfless gesture we make toward the departed. By surrendering our cherished memories of them, we allow them to journey onward, unfettered by our sorrow._

 _I don't feel selfless, though. I am curious. I sneak back into the house. I don't yet understand death. I need to see it. I quickly loosen the string at one end of the shroud. I cannot imagine a punishment severe enough to equal what will happen if I am caught, but the fear does not stop me. Suddenly a hand claps down on my shoulder._

 _"This will be our little secret", the tall man whispers. I am too shocked to answer. I can tell he assumes I am frightened at being discovered, and he is not wrong. More than that, though, I am struggling to understand what I have seen. It will be many years before I am able to make sense of it._

 _The shroud was empty._

 **A/N** : **Thank you for reading! One of the recurring themes of the book is going to be people or things appearing to be one thing, and then turning out to be something else entirely. I hope you like it! This is the first book of a planned trilogy. It starts out a bit slow, but it definitely picks up in the middle. Stick with it, it gets good :)**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	2. Chapter 2 Aptitude Test

I just want to get home as fast as I can. Except now I don't know where home is. Today we were given our aptitude tests. When we are sixteen, we undergo a simulation that tells us, based on our choices, what faction we should join. Strictly speaking, we have the right to choose any of the five factions, and once we make that choice we are bound by it. Defections from Abnegation are rare though, and as the daughter of one of our leaders, I know what is expected of me.

Before I sat down in that chair, I would not have been able to tell you what I feared more: that the result would be Abnegation and consign me to a lifetime of gray, suffocating silence, or that the result would be something else, and I would be tempted to leave my family and all that I knew behind. I was certainly not prepared for the result that I got.

"Wake up! You have to get out of here now."

The Dauntless woman who administered my test quickly turned back to the computer and was frantically typing.

"What happened? What was my result?"

She bent over me as if to remove my electrodes, but whispered instead.

"There are cameras everywhere, don't say anything. You are in danger. Your test results were inconclusive."

I opened my mouth to speak, but she quickly covered it with her hand.

"You are Abnegation. And Dauntless. And Erudite. They call it Divergent. If they find out, they will kill you. Stay in Abnegation, they're less likely to find you there. Don't tell anyone. Not your parents, not your instructors, not your friends. Trust no one."

Her voice changed back to normal as she removed the electrodes.

"Sometimes the serum makes people sick. I'll have to enter your Abnegation result by hand. You should go home now and rest, you have a big day tomorrow."

Later that afternoon I am lying on my bed. I have so many questions. _They call it Divergent._ What does that mean, and who are _they?_ Why would they want to kill me? None of it makes any sense. It would be so easy to just pretend it never happened. My brother Caleb, less than a year older than me, shyly pokes his head through the doorway.

"Are you OK? They said you went home early."

He is perfectly selfless, as always. I have no doubt he will choose Abnegation tomorrow.

"The simulation serum made me sick." I am surprised how natural the lie sounds already.

He pauses, and I can tell he is wavering between concern for me and the urge not to impose himself. This is the constant inner struggle of the true Abnegation. Interestingly, curiosity wins out. We are forbidden to discuss our simulation results with anyone prior to the choosing. He would never ask, though I know he wants to.

"Would you feel better if we talked about it?"

"I'm fine Caleb – really. I'll be down in a bit to help with dinner."

Abnegation dinners are quiet affairs. In fact, it's not unusual for entire meal to pass in silence. My mother says she finds it relaxing. Everyone knows their role, serving food, passing dishes without being asked, speech is unnecessary. My father seems unusually preoccupied, and my mother notices.

"How is Marcus holding up?" she asks.

"I wish I knew who was spreading those rumors about him."

I instantly begin to pay more attention. Although all of our leaders are meant to be equal, Marcus is by far the most powerful. I've never told anyone what he said to me that day at the funeral. I don't get to hear any more, though. It's time for my brother and me to do the dishes.

We've done this so many times that we move almost in unison. He washes and I dry.

"It's true, you know."

"What?"

"About Marcus – and why his son defected."

I remember those tiny clenched fingers. It's hard to imagine the boy I saw, grown and Dauntless. I haven't seen him since his mother's funeral.

"I saw him beating Tobias once right before he left. He was hitting him with a belt over and over, I thought he might kill him, his back was raw and bleeding. I ran home to get help, but Father said we mustn't interfere, that there were things I couldn't understand now."

"So Father knew?"

"Yes - I don't understand why he's protecting Marcus."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Father made me promise."

"Why are you telling me now?"

"It doesn't matter anymore."

I catch my brother's eyes, just for a moment. I know, in that instant, he is planning to leave.

I lay awake most of the night. I know I have to decide, but every choice scares me. Staying in Abnegation fills me with dread, and though the woman who administered my simulation said it would be safer here, I'm not so sure. What if it's a trap? My brother's revelations about Marcus and my father have made me realize that no one here is who they've been pretending to be. Even my mother. She plays the part of a perfect Abnegation wife, but every so often that careful veneer cracks, and I see something else underneath. She's never talked about her family and I've never asked. I've also never asked her about the tattoos I once saw covering her back. Only Dauntless have tattoos. And now Caleb – my perfect, sweet, selfless brother, is leaving. I try to imagine what it will be like without him. I know this will tear our family apart, past mending. They'll only have me, Beatrice, a faint and imperfect substitute. And the silence. There is nothing left for me here.

I tiptoe downstairs and open the cabinet that holds the only mirror in our house. Mirrors encourage vanity, and we are allowed to look for only a few seconds a day. I stare at my reflection, and it stares back. I loosen my hair and it falls like a halo around my shoulders. I am not vain, only curious. I search for some sign of what I should do, but I get no answer.

"I thought I might find you here."

I turn to see my mother in the doorway. How long has she been there?

"When your father and I were first married, I spent hours in front of this mirror."

"Why?" This is the kind of question the Abnegation would never ask.

"I suppose I was afraid of how much I was changing, I had to make sure I was still me."

My mother has never spoken so frankly to me. I look away, embarrassed, as if she has just undressed.

"You have a decision to make."

"Yes." I look away.

She moves toward me, taking both my hands in hers. She hasn't touched me since I was a little girl. I had forgotten what her hands felt like.

"Beatrice, listen to me. I know what you are." I am relieved, but also horrified because now I know what happened earlier was real. I want to let her know she is right about me, but the words I heard earlier, _trust no one,_ echo once again, and I say nothing.

"Your father and I will protect you, no matter the cost." I had not realized I might be putting them in danger.

"You can make a life here." I shake my head as she reaches again for my hands, holding them tightly.

"Yes, you can – I know it. You can learn to bear this life… as I have." Her smile is wistful as she smooth my hair. "And now you know _my_ secret. "

As she sighs and turns away, I can almost see the veil descend. When she speaks again, it is her Abnegation voice I hear.

"You know we must never speak of this."

"Yes, I know."

 **A/N** : **Thank you for reading!** **Any reviews (good or bad) are greatly appreciated.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	3. Chapter 3 The Choosing

I awake from a dreamless sleep, feeling as if I've not slept at all, though the sun is streaming through my window. I realize my father has been calling to me.

"Beatrice, it's time."

When I come downstairs, I see Caleb has already eaten breakfast and is ready to go. He seem calm – eager, even. I am still confused. I search my parents' faces for clues to what they might be thinking, but they betray nothing. If I choose to leave Abnegation, my contact with them will be limited after today. Faction before blood. Though I've never understood that ideal, I've not questioned it before now. I look around the kitchen, it seems smaller somehow. _This will be the last time we are all here together._ As if I've said it aloud, I realize my decision is already all but made.

We all walk together to the hall where the choosing takes place. It's hot and the rough fabric of my dress scratches my neck. As we get closer, I feel myself slowing down, wanting to delay it as long as possible. Just as we arrive, we are overtaken by a group of Dauntless. They jumped off the moving train and are racing each other to the door. They are instantly recognizable in their black clothes, dyed hair, piercings and tattoos. They have always fascinated me, I suppose it is because they are the antithesis of Abnegation. And I suspect they were the faction of my mother. The Dauntless are soldiers – they protect our city from the factionless, and what lies outside the wall. They tease and jostle each other. I envy their casual contact. They are at ease with themselves. I wonder why my mother left.

As we enter the building, a blond woman approaches us, dressed in Erudite blue.

"Andrew, I'm glad you're here, we need to talk." My father looks troubled.

"Of course, Jeanine, what's wrong?" I realize that she is Jeanine Matthews, the leader of Erudite. My parents speak of her often but this is the first time I've ever seen her. The Erudite are the scientists and engineers for our city. Their skills are highly valued, so they get the best food and have better clothes and housing. I've heard their headquarters houses a vast library, extending many stories underground. You can read all day, if you like. Among the Abnegation, curiosity is frowned upon. I try to imagine what it would be like to be rewarded for it.

"It's the Dauntless…" she looks around to see if anyone is listening. I know I should take my seat but my curiosity is piqued. Instead I look away, pretending I'm distracted by the paintings that cover the walls from floor to ceiling. They tell the story of our City, the Great Fall and the rise of the factions. I keep my ear pointed toward her, but now they are whispering. I edge slightly closer, pretending now to brush away imaginary dust from the front of my dress. I risk a glance in their direction and find her staring straight at me. _Caught._

"I didn't know you had a daughter." She's addressing my father but her eyes don't leave mine. She studies me with a level of scrutiny I've never before experienced.

"Jeanine, allow me to introduce my younger child, Beatrice." I don't like being called a child.

She holds out her hand to me in the Erudite fashion. It is an unfamiliar gesture to the Abnegation, who avoid contact, but I look toward my father and he nods, so I take it. She smiles at me, as if she knows me.

"I hope you will choose wisely today – and I know you will." She turns back to my father.

"Is it really a choice?" The words fly from my mouth before I realize it. "I mean, doesn't the aptitude test tell us how we should choose?" She turns back toward me, and I am immediately worried that she senses my reason for asking this question. _Does she know what I am?_

"It provides guidance, of course. But we are all given the freedom to choose." She glances at my father, and he looks away. Caleb told me once he suspected Father had defected to Abnegation from Erudite. I wonder if he and Jeanine had been friends, and realize how little I really know about him. _Too late, now._

Marcus walks to the front of the Hall, holds up his hand to quiet the room, and we quickly find seats with the Abnegation. He calls out the first name. By tradition, they are read in reverse alphabetical order. It's happening too fast. I don't know what to do. I look to my brother but he is staring straight ahead. I've seen this ceremony every year since I can remember, but this time it feels completely new. The first name belongs to a pretty girl from Amity. She walks to the table, takes the knife from Marcus' hand, makes a small cut, and squeezes a drop of blood into the bowl filled with soil. She looks up with a huge smile as her faction cheers. She is staying in Amity.

One by one, names are called, most return to their faction of origin. The bowls contain gray stone for Abnegation, rich soil for Amity, glass for Candor, water for Erudite, and hot coals for Dauntless. I wonder why we have to choose to be just one thing.

"Prior, Caleb" I am pulled from my reverie, and watch my brother advance to the table. He must know I am watching but he does not look in my direction. He does not pause even for a second after making the cut before holding out his hand. His blood falls into the bowl of water. I hear my mother next to me inhale sharply, but she displays no other reaction. He walks over to the sea of blue that is Erudite, and they welcome him, clapping.

"Prior, Beatrice" I slowly walk to the table and take the knife in my hand. I am surprised by how much pressure it takes to pierce my skin, but I feel no pain. I stretch out my arm. I know I can't stay in Abnegation. That life is not for me, and I won't endanger my parents. But where, then? I can hear the burning coals in the Dauntless bowl, and I am tempted. I ache for that freedom, but I can't bear the thought of being completely alone. I sigh, and my blood falls into the water. I feel as if I am borne on a wave toward the Erudite as they stand to greet me. What have I done? My brother finds me and hugs me for the first time, unfamiliar and familiar at the same time. The entire hall is murmuring now, defections are rare, and two in one family are unheard of. It dies down quickly though as the next name is called. I turn my head, looking for my parents. Instead I see Jeanine. She is smiling at me and I feel a rush of relief. I'm sure everything will be alright, now.

 **A/N** : **Thank you for reading!**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	4. Chapter 4 Welcome to Erudite

I've never been in a car before. Rows of them were waiting for us outside when the ceremony ended. It's clean and quiet as we speed through the city. Many of the buildings are in ruins, sad reminders of the Fall. Only the factionless live there. They are the outcasts of our society. Some survive by performing menial jobs for the other factions, the rest live off the charity of the Abnegation. Most of them are were born to factionless parents, but we can also be made factionless as a punishment for severe crime.

Ahead of us, rising higher and more modern than any other building, I see the Erudite headquarters. The glass walls are etched in such a way as to make it appear as if there is water falling continuously down on them. I used to find the architectural contrast jarring, but now it looks beautiful to me. The car stops, the door opens on its own, and I step out.

"Erudite-born to the right, transfers to the left, please."

I look around for my brother and spot him among a group of Candor, dressed in black and white. As I walk toward him, I feel self-conscious about my own dress. We are the only ones in Abnegation grey. A young woman in a blue jumpsuit approaches us and I'm interrupted before I get a chance to get Caleb's attention.

"Transfers come this way, please."

We are led into a white room and each handed a small basket. There are twelve of us. Beside my brother and me, there are seven Candor, two Amity and one Dauntless. I study their faces but they all seem so different from me, so foreign.

"My name is Athena and I'll be one of your instructors. It's important that you remove anything metallic - jewelry, watches, coins, whatever. Put them in the basket. We'll keep them safe for you and you'll get them back after".

Before I get the chance, a Candor girl speaks up, "After what? What's happening?"

Until today, I would have been punished for speaking out of turn, but the instructor seems unbothered by these questions. "You'll see. It's a surprise."

"I want to know now."

She laughs. "Of course you do. That's why you're here."

All around me I hear the clink of metal, but Caleb and I have nothing to remove. An Amity girl meets my gaze and smiles broadly as she slips a necklace over her head. She has long red hair and freckles.

"Is everyone ready? Good, follow me."

Athena opens another door, opposite from the one we came in through. There is a long, dark tunnel and I can hear rushing water. As my eyes adjust to the lack of light, I see the exit, but it is blocked by a torrent of falling water.

"It's OK, you can walk through it." One by one we walk through the water, but are untouched by it. It's amazing. We emerge on the other side into a huge sunlit atrium, many stories high.

"Welcome to Erudite." I can tell Athena is proud of her faction as she stands in front of us. "We all make that trip when we begin our initiation. Think of it as washing away your old lives, and showing you what's possible in the new one. By the time you're full members, you'll know exactly how it works."

A purple-haired Dauntless boy is still running his hands along his arms and through his hair, marveling at their dryness. "I don't understand…" he murmurs.

"Isn't it obvious?" I am surprised to hear my brother answering. "They generated a magnetic field around us, which repelled the water."

Athena turns to him and smiles. "Very good. What's your name?"

"I'm, Caleb. This is my sister Beatrice."

"Sibling defectors, huh? I'll be keeping my eye on you two."

Caleb beams with pride, but I am horrified. Whatever reassurance I felt after the Choosing has vanished completely and I am filled with apprehension, remembering my aptitude test. I should never have come here. They'll find out and then they'll kill me. What am I? Why is it so dangerous? I want to ask someone, but I don't know who to trust.

Athena turns to the rest of the group. "Right then everyone, follow me, I'll take you to your dorms. You'll have a few minutes to get dressed, and then it's dinner in the Great Hall."

We follow her up a staircase and down another hallway. The girl from Amity is walking next to me now, looking overwhelmed.

"Do you think we'll ever learn our way around here? It's like a maze."

"I'm sure we'll figure it out in time." I answer.

"I'm Amy." She reaches out and squeezes my arm. I'm taken aback and it must show on my face, because she instantly glances around uncomfortably and whispers, "Sorry, it's an Amity thing."

Caleb, behind be now, chuckles smugly. "You're not in Amity anymore."

I turn around and stare at my brother. I can't believe he's being so rude. Is it really this easy to shrug off sixteen years of self-effacement? His new personality unsettles me.

Athena points to the first doorway and I peer inside. "It's two to a room." I look back at Amy and she bobs her head cheerfully and follows me through the door.

The room is light-filled and beautiful. There are framed abstract art prints on the walls and two narrow beds with blue quilts and large pillows. Near the head of each bed is a computer terminal. Amy hops onto the bed and touches the screen. She squeals in delight.

"I've _heard_ about this!" She exclaims. "Every book ever written, right here any time you want. Isn't it amazing?" I nod, wondering if there are books about Divergents. Any search from this terminal could be traced straight to me, though. My father once told me the Erudite track everything, though I don't know how he could have known that.

"And new clothes!" She holds the blue fabric up to her cheek. "I've never had new clothes before." It occurs to me that while the Amity, who work the farms that feed our city, are as poor as the Abnegation, they don't necessarily consider it a virtue. Her yellow blouse and red skirt are patched in several places. She quickly shucks them off and pulls the blue dress over her head. I look away.

"Sorry, I forgot how you guys are." She shrugs.

"It's OK, we're Erudite now." Those words feel so foreign. I turn my back to her and quickly change into an identical blue dress. I've worn burlap my entire life, and the new dress is made of some kind of smooth material I've never seen. It feels wonderful.

"It's called silk." she tells me.

I cross the room and look in the full-length mirror. The dress looks good on me, skimming my still-boyish hips. Amy comes up behind me and we look back at each other in the mirror.

"You should undo that bun. All the boys love blonds!" With that, she grabs the pins from my carefully constructed knot and my hair tumbles down around my shoulders. I want to put it back, but my mother always did it for me, and I feel a brief pang of regret. Showing my hair like this makes me feel so exposed, but I take a deep breath and smile back at her.

"You remind me a little bit of my sister." She says softly. I see a bright tear form at the bottom of her eye, but she flicks it away before it falls. In an unfamiliar move, I turn to her and put my hand on her shoulder. She smiles back, bravely.

"OK Beatrice, let's go. Time for dinner. I can't wait to see what they eat!"

"Me neither." I follow her out the door and join the other initiates. Thankfully some of them seem to know where we are going. As I listen to the chatter around me, I find myself wondering what I'd be doing right now had I chosen Dauntless instead. Those thoughts leave me instantly though, once I smell the food. I'm sure the Dauntless don't eat half so well.

 **A/N Hello! This is my first time writing anything. Would love to hear from you (good or bad!) either in reviews or PM. I'm amazed how many have read it already, and I love seeing what countries you are from.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	5. Chapter 5 An Erudite Dinner

As I walk through the doors of the Great Hall I am awestruck. There are four long wooden tables that span the length of the room, easily a hundred meters. At the front of the room, opposite the entry, is a slightly raised dais with a shorter table arranged perpendicular to the other tables. The floors are marble and the tables and walls are made of ornately carved dark wood. It takes me several moments to take it all in. And then I look up. The sky-blue ceiling is many stories up and there are actual clouds hovering just below it. It has not rained since the Fall, but I have seen pictures of clouds in books. They did not prepare me for the beauty of that ceiling. Someone taps me politely on my shoulder and I realize I've been staring far too long. I continue into the hall, searching for Caleb. I find him seated at the far end of a table, flanked by two Erudite-born initiates.

"…and that's when I realized the cat was dead!" Caleb and his companions collapse in a fit of high-pitched giggles. He sees me standing in front of him and quickly wipes the grin off his face. Before today, he'd have been punished severely for laughing in public.

"Hey Beatrice, Linus here was just telling me this really funny joke. It's about quantum mechanics."

"I get it. It's Schroedinger's cat." I answer. Amy, standing right behind me, laughs out loud. I want to laugh with them, but something holds me back. I can tell his friends think I'm just another humorless Abnegation.

"Sit down. Guys, this is my kid sister Beatrice. Beatrice, this is Linus and Stephen."

"This is my friend, Amy."

Before there is any more time for conversation, a side door to the dais opens, and Jeanine strides in, taking her place at the center of the table on the dais. Next, the oldest man I've ever seen hobbles toward the table. As he walks, he is bent over his cane, his back almost parallel with the floor. A young man guides him to the seat to Jeanine's right.

I hear Linus whisper to Caleb, "That's the Guardian. He's the oldest living member of Erudite, and the only one who remembers the time before the Fall."

"How is that possible?" Caleb whispers back. "He'd have to be at least a hundred and fifty." Linus shrugs. "I don't know, but my grandmother says he was old even when she was a little girl."

Several other people seat themselves to either side of Jeanine and the Guardian. When they are all situated, Jeanine nods, and rows of factionless kitchen workers appear with trays of food. The abundance of it thrills me and shames me at the same time. A warm bread roll appears in front of me, and a dish of some kind of smooth, yellow paste. Stephen splits open his roll and leans forward to stick a dull knife into the dish. He spreads it liberally on the inside of his roll and starts eating it. Amy, my brother, and I are watching him intently.

"What, you've never seen butter before? Try it."

Amy goes first, followed by Caleb. I wait until they've finished before I try to mimic Stephen's actions. I take a bite, and it is amazing. The white bread tastes almost sweet, and the warm butter is salty and unimaginably rich and creamy. Then comes another surprise. The workers place a larger dish in front of me, and my breath catches as I realize it's fish. The great lake disappeared at the time of the Fall, and we are far inland and with no natural sources of water within the confines of the fence that surrounds the city. I wonder where it came from. My glass is filled with some kind of bubbling liquid.

"Wow, soda!" exclaims Amy, and she gulps most of her glass down in a single swallow. Her hand goes to her stomach and she opens her mouth to say something, but all that comes out is a giant belch. Amy's face turns bright red as my brother and his friends point and laugh at her.

"I guess we have to drink this stuff slowly." I say, trying to make her feel better. She soon forgets her embarrassment though as she starts to eat her fish, pausing only to sigh occasionally.

The people around us seated at the table chat politely amongst themselves, but Caleb, Amy, and I are all silent. Caleb and I are silent by training, and Amy enjoys her food far too much to waste time talking. I catch the odd word or two floating around me. I hear several passing reference to "the grays". It's clear that the Erudite mistrust them, though I can't imagine why. As I finish, I look around again at the walls of the dining room. At regular intervals, there are ancient-looking portraits of people wearing blue robes and oddly shaped, velvet hats with tassles hanging over the sides. I wonder if they were past leaders of Erudite, or if perhaps these paintings survived the Fall.

A hush falls over the hall as Jeanine rises to her feet. "I would like to welcome you all to our Great Hall. Each of you, from our beloved Guardian", she turns to her right and nods to him, "to our newest transfer initiates", she glances straight at me, briefly, "have been entrusted with the sacred task of safeguarding the knowledge of our people. It is a privilege, and a great responsibility. When I was young, I often wondered why our founders chose water as our symbol. Only as I grew older did I recognize the wisdom of that choice. Even without water, fire ultimately consumes itself. Glass contains water temporarily, but it is too brittle to outlast it for long. Soil depends on water, and is be washed away by it. Even mountains of stone eventually succumb to the ravages of water. Water is ever changing, ever adapting, just as the Erudite must be." She pauses to allow her audience claps and raps on the wooden tables in support.

"In recent times, it has become increasingly clear that we must adapt once again. We have been the guardians of knowledge, but now we must assume our role as stewards of that knowledge. We must continuously push our boundaries outward, ever seeking ways to understand the world and improve our lives". She lowers her voice now. I glance over at Caleb and his eyes are moist with emotion. He is enraptured. "We know that difficult times lay ahead. Not all the people of our city will understand the necessity of what we are doing. They have been kept in ignorance far too long by those who have been entrusted to govern them. Our Abnegation leaders allow themselves only a narrow view of the present, and are incapable of comprehending the broader picture, or the future implications of their actions. They claim to preach the higher purpose of morality, but it is merely willful ignorance." She spits those words out as if they taste bad. "They claim to avow self-denial, but in truth it is we who have been denied the full fruits of our labors. Who better to lead our city into the light than those with the superior knowledge to do so? Again, she is interrupted by noisy displays of agreement. Young people of Erudite, you will be able to tell your grandchildren you were here the day we resolved to enter a new, golden age of enlightenment." She is almost shouting now as she raises her fist high into the air. " _Scientia vos liberabit!"_

All around me the hall erupts into cheering and the latin phrase echos continuously through its cavernous heights. Caleb and his friends are on their feet, and I can hear Amy repeating it with a fervor I would not have thought her capable of. I look up and consider once again the clouds overhead. They are still beautiful, but now I can't help wondering if they are signs of a coming storm.

 **A/N: I had in mind the dining room at Balliol College, Oxford when I was imagining the Erudite dining hall. I think of Erudite architecture generally as being very sort of cutting edge modern, but the dining hall and the library…** ** _shhh! Wait 'til you see the library!_** **are going to be very "old school", and the contrast will be a sort of metaphor for the dichotomy between the old Erudite and the new one that Jeanine envisions. Also, if you want to see some real, and hauntingly beautiful indoor clouds, check out the work of the Dutch artist Berndnaut Smilde.**

 **Also, sorry this chapter took a few days, but I needed to get it right because it lays the foundation for the Erudite point of view on the coming conflict with Abnegation. I'm still not happy with it at all, but maybe some of you can help me with it. Thank you very much to my first reviewer the other day! It was tremendously encouraging.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	6. Chapter 6 A Second Aptitude Test

I awake to the polite ding of an Erudite alarm clock. I look around and realize the sound is coming from the computer monitor that is attached to the headboard of my bed. Despite my unease, I slept soundly last night. I'm not sure whether it was the food or the comfort of the bed, but I feel well-rested. The headboard dings again and a calm female voice announces, "Breakfast for initiates in 30 minutes."

"I've never slept so well in my life!" exclaims Amy. "Mind if I jump in the shower?"

"Go ahead". I stretch lazily, wondering what the day will bring. Amy is out before long, her red hair wrapped in a crisp white towel and with another towel wrapped around her middle. I take her place in the bathroom. Like everything else in Erudite, it is luxury itself, compared to what I'm used to. I turn the shower on and am surprised at how warm and plentiful the water is. It feels amazing. Set into the wall is a soap dispenser, and I lather up my hands and start washing my hair. The soap has a calming, clean laundry smell. Memories of my mother folding laundry stab me unexpectedly, but I allow them to be washed away, along with my worries. _You made the right choice,_ I tell myself. _Who are you trying to convince? another voice responds._ I rinse my hair quickly and turn the water off.

Amy and I fall in line with the other initiates and are led into a smaller cafeteria for breakfast. Unlike the Great Hall, this room has a modern, almost anesthetic, feel. The walls are light blue and the tables and benches are smooth white lacquer. We join a table with two other girls who are deep in conversation. It's clear they've been friends much longer than Amy and me. As we sit down, they look up expectantly.

"Hi, I'm Amy, this is Beatrice." I'm relieved Amy is willing to make the introductions. They nod.

"I'm Laura." says a graceful girl with long, dark hair. "My name's Emma". She, too, has dark hair but it is much shorter, almost like a boy's. "We're both from Candor, originally." Given the animosity on display last night toward Abnegation, I decide it is best not to volunteer my origins, and thankfully Amy doesn't mention it, either. Earlier, as I had brushed my hair in front of the mirror, I had been struck but how little I resembled the grey-clad little girl from Abnegation who arrived here yesterday. A part of me had regretted it then, but now I see the advantage in it.

"Wasn't last night amazing?" Emma asks us. Amy beams and nods actively. "I mean, I'm so glad the Erudite are finally saying it out loud."

"What do you mean?" I ask, though I know it would be wiser to change the topic.

"About the Abnegation, and how they shouldn't be in charge anymore", says Laura.

This alarms me, as it is becoming clear that it's not just the Erudite who are eager for an end to Abnegation's control of the government. In Abnegation we were taught that power corrupts, and that the safest place for power to be bestowed is upon those who do not seek it. In that way, it is actually a burden that the Abnegation are selflessly willing to shoulder. I know better than to offer this viewpoint to my new friends, though.

"In Candor they're saying that the Abnegation leaders know what's outside the fence but they refuse to tell us", Emma says.

"We've heard that, too" says Amy, glancing nervously toward me. "If they were true friends, wouldn't they be open about dangers that we will all have to face together?" _Even the Amity are questioning us?_

"Maybe we're safer not knowing," I offer.

Amy laughs, "That's not very Erudite of you!"

Laura scans my face suspiciously. "Where did you say you came from?"

I open my mouth to answer, but am interrupted by Athena as she joins our table.

"Eat up, everyone, you want to be at your best for the second aptitude test." Athena gestures toward the trays of muffins and jugs of milk and juice as they are placed in the center of the table.

I freeze. " _Second_ test? What for?" I ask.

"For the rest of your initiation, you will be spending the mornings honing your problem solving skills as a group, but you'll spend your afternoons in the labs of your mentors. The second test is more in depth than the first, and determines which field you have the most aptitude for. They were very accurate in my case."

"What if you don't have any aptitude?" Emma asks. Laura giggles, "You _would_ be the one to ask that!"

Athena pauses, "That hardly ever happens, I mean, people _know_ if they're smart or not. Otherwise why would you have come here?" _Why indeed, I ask myself._ "In rare cases though, initiates who score low on IQ are given the option of either becoming lab assistants or joining the factionless."

My panic must show on my face, but Athena mistakes its source. She smiles warmly at me and says, "Don't worry, I'm sure you'll be fine."

I choke down the rest of my breakfast, but the muffin is like sawdust in my dry mouth. _A second aptitude test. And it's even more in-depth. How will I avoid detection?_

Athena stands up, "OK it's time, form a line."

I realize that there is nothing I can do to avoid the test that wouldn't arouse even more suspicion, so I tell myself that the last aptitude test was a series of choices, and so this one is likely similar. I can decide what choices to make, right?

We are led down a white hallway and told to wait our turn. There are four doors that appear to lead to identical chambers, and one by one, the initiates are taken into them. Caleb is one of the first to enter, and when he exits, he is visibly pleased with himself. He is quickly ushered away, though, so I don't get the chance to ask him where he's going. It's almost my turn and my pulse quickens even as I steel myself. It's as if I can hear my heart beating out loud, but then I realize it's the insistent tapping of fast feet, rapidly approaching. I turn to see who is coming. It's Jeanine. She stops directly in front of me and I raise my eyes to meet hers. _They've found me._

"Oh good, I've caught you. This is a waste of your time, I've got something else in mind for you. Something very important," she's speaking softly now, and smiling as if we both share some secret. My relief is mixed with new worries, but there is nothing I can do.

"Athena, I'll be taking Beatrice with me." It's not a request. Athena looks surprised, but stammers, "Yes, Jeannine – of course."

"Follow me" Jeanine commands. I obey. She leads me back down the hall and into an elevator. Once inside, she places her palm on a pad to activate it. Apparently, it is keyed to her biosignal, and we start to ascend. She eyes me up and down. "Erudite is certainly a big change from Abnegation." I don't know what to say, so I nod. The elevator comes to a halt and we step out. We are in Jeanine's office. It appears to be at the very top of the building, and I can see all the way to the fence in every direction. It's breathtaking.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" I was actually thinking I'd never realized from the ground how scarred the landscape was, but again I simply nod.

She motions for me to sit and then takes a seat directly across from me. She leans forward expectantly, and I look back at her.

"I was worried you wouldn't come to us after your brother chose Erudite – I thought you might feel pressure to stay behind," she begins. "But then again, I always say Abnegation selflessness is just for show. I'm glad they didn't get to you." I smile back at her, because that's what she's waiting for. She continues.

"What I'm about to tell you is secret, and you must tell no one, not even the other Erudite, not even your brother. Can you promise me that, Beatrice?"

If there's anything I've learnt to do, it's keep a secret. "Yes, I can do that." Despite my fear of detection, I am intrigued.

"Good. You like to watch people, don't you? Figure them out, find out what they're up to?" I blush, remembering my eavesdropping before the choosing ceremony. She briefly waves a hand as if to physically brush aside my embarrassment. "As you know, the public role of Erudite is to further the scientific and technological capabilities of our people. The Dauntless are tasked with policing the factionless and guarding the fence. This is vital for the survival of our City, and they fulfill that duties adequately, though perhaps somewhat inelegantly," she smiles briefly.

"Recently we've realized that in addition to threats from outside our City, there are a number of threats growing from within. For this reason, we have begun to monitor the activities of the other factions. Such a task requires more finesse than the Dauntless are capable of, so it falls to us."

My mind is racing. The Erudite have been _spying_ on us?

As if she can read my thoughts, "It's important that you understand that this isn't spying. Spying is hostile. We are not spies, we are W _atchers._ We do this out of concern, not malice. There is a small group among us who have been entrusted with this important task, and I think that you have the right kind of mind for it. And I think you'll find it very interesting" She pauses. "It's your choice, though. You can go through the aptitude test and be assigned to a lab like the rest of your fellow initiates, if that's what you want."

She knows she has me, but she doesn't know why. I want to know who the Erudite have been spying on, and I'll do anything to avoid another aptitude test. "I'd like to join the Watchers", I respond.

The satisfaction is clear on her face. "Excellent, I knew you'd understand. Now remember, you mustn't discuss this with anyone."

"What should I tell them I'm doing?" I ask.

"Just tell them you're working with me."

 ** _A/N: Thanks for reading! In case some of you are disappointed that we won't be meeting Four until Capture the Flag, don't be! We're going to be seeing him very soon, actually…_**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	7. Chapter 7 Quis Custodiet Ipsos Custodes?

Jeanine leads me out of her office and back towards the elevator. Once inside, she again places her palm on the pad, and then speaks. "Computer, grant level 4 access: Prior, Beatrice." She gestures for me to place my hand on the pad. Once I do, the computer responds. "Access Granted."

"Level B24, please". I feel the elevator descending. This time it's taking much longer and I wonder how far down the Erudite headquarters extend. We step out into a dark hallway, lit only by recessed blue lights. The walls are made of solid rock. "Beatrice, make note of where I'm taking you. It's easy to get lost." I look around me as we walk, but there are very few doorways. One in particularly grabs my attention, though. It's marked 'Library'. I quicken my pace to catch up with Jeanine.

"Here we are." She places her hand on another pad and a door slides open. This room is brightly lit and filled with computer screens. This room appears to be a hub, as there are five additional doors leading off from it. They are each labeled with the names of a different faction, including Erudite. The people working at their terminals pause only briefly when they see us, and it is clear from the casual manner in which they greet Jeanine that she is here often. I feel a flicker of hope that perhaps she'll take me into the Abnegation room, but I brush it away as it occurs to me how painful it would be to see my parents.

She leads me in the opposite direction though, toward the door marked "Dauntless". She pauses and turns toward me before entering. "I've always found the Dauntless to be the hardest to fathom, even more so than the Abnegation. Bravery is a fine virtue, of course, but in practice it always seems to devolve into savagery." I know this is the wrong time to mention that I find them fascinating. Jeanine sighs and opens the door. There are 3 people in this room, and an enormous array of screens that completely cover 3 of the walls. Two of them quietly dictate observations while continually flipping through a series of views, while the third seems to be studying selected images with greater scrutiny. From the number of screens and the speed with which the images change on each one, it appears that that the Erudite have blanketed the Dauntless headquarters with cameras. I stare, open-mouthed.

"Amazing, isn't it? From this room, we can see almost everything that goes on." Jeanine crosses over to the third worker and introduces me. "Arnold, I've brought you some help. This is Beatrice Prior."

Arnold is about the age of my father, brown haired with a bit of grey at the temples. He's dressed in a high-necked dark blue sweater and idly twirls a pencil in his left hand. He surveys me with a raised eyebrow. " _Prior_?"

"Yes," responds Jeanine. "Her brother is here as well."

"Well now that _is_ interesting," he responds. I can tell he's wondering if I can be trusted. He is apparently unwilling to question Jeanine on this point, however.

Jeanine looks down at his monitor and seems to recognize who he's studying. "Oh good, I see you're keeping a close eye on him." Jeanine gestures toward the screen. Arnold taps a few keys and the image Jeanine's looking at expands to fill the entire wall. It's not the kind of scene I was expecting to see in Dauntless. Many of the other monitors contain images of Dauntless members sparring with each other, or training with rifles. This one is completely different, though. The room in the image on the wall mirrors the room I'm standing in. This room has only a single solitary figure in it, and his back is to us. The figure is wearing a black t-shirt, and I can see part of a tattoo extending upward and around his neck on either side. It looks like fire. With the image enlarged, I'm able to see that he is monitoring a series of screens, which also display a number of views from Dauntless, but not nearly as many as in our room. Like us, he is focused on just one of them, though. An ancient Latin phrase springs to mind, "Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?" _Who watches the watchers?_ The experience is surreal.

"What's our young friend Four up to this morning?" Jeanine asks.

"He's watching Eric train the new initiates," Arnold replies. Jeanine doesn't seem to like this news, but she says nothing. She turns back to me and smiles briefly. "I'll leave you in Arnold's capable hands." Jeanine then turns and leaves.

"Welcome to the watchers, Beatrice," says Arnold, quietly. He points to his two companions. "That's Ethel," he says, pointing to the woman. "And that's Julius. Don't talk to them, they're in the zone." He motions to the seat next to him, and I sit down. He turns back to his screen and without looking at me, starts to explain how the various monitors work, and how to choose a particular screen for viewing and dictating notes. It's relatively simple and I'm soon able to demonstrate mastery of the system. Arnold seems satisfied, and turns his attention back to the screen he was viewing before.

"Four is an interesting one," he says, tapping a finger on the screen.

At first I had thought 'four' referred to the screen number, but I can see now it does not. "Is that a nickname you gave him?" I ask. "Actually, no, it seems he chose it for himself. He's not your typical Dauntless brute, though." Arnold zooms in on the screen that Four is watching and squints to see what's attracted his attention. Originally he'd been watching initiate training, but now he's focused on what looks like the side of a cliff. "Ethel! Tell me what's going on in the Chasm."

"Wow, this is crazy." Ethel says as she expands the chasm view behind us. I turn, but it is several moments before I am able to process what I'm looking at. There is a cliff bordering a chasm, and a metal bridge spans the chasm. Hanging by the tips of her fingers from the bridge is a dark-skinned young girl. She must be terrified. Several other initiates are gathered around her, and I can't understand why none of them are helping her. A huge blond man who appears to be in charge is shouting at them, but there is no audio. He has a ring through his nose and large tattoos on his neck and arms. Arnold points toward him, "That's Eric, he's in charge of training the initiates. A natural-born killer, that one." Arnold turns back to his own screen. "Watch, Four's not gonna like this one bit."

Sure enough, Four stands up and almost runs to the door. We see him appear only seconds later on the Chasm screen. Now that he's standing, I can see he is tall and lean, the opposite of Eric. The initiates see Four and for some reason now they reach for the girl and pull her up. Her arms are shaking and I doubt she'd have been able to hold on much longer. She is on the bridge now and sobbing in the arms of another initiate. Four watches her with concern, the relief on his face is clear. I notice he is handsome with close-cropped hair and dark blue eyes. Eric turns now and sees Four. We can't see Eric's face, but the look on Four's tells us everything we need to know about their relationship. His features are cold, as if set in stone. His eyes are now Dauntless black.

 **A/N Two chapters today! I guess I couldn't wait to see Four. Thanks for reading and please let me know what you think.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	8. Chapter 8 An Afternoon Off

Arnold tells me it's time for lunch and shoos me away. "We'll start your real training tomorrow afternoon, initiates get their first afternoon off. Go relax. Have a look around. Do you know the way back?" I nod. I make my way back down the rocky hallway, but I stop again at the door marked "Library". There's no pad on the door, and I'm tempted to go in, but I'm afraid I'll be missed, and I'm curious where the others have been assigned to work. In the elevator, I press my hand to the pad, say "Cafeteria," and feel myself start to ascend.

In the cafeteria, I find my brother at a table with Linus and Stephen and join them. They are completely absorbed by whatever Caleb is telling them, and they almost don't notice when I sit down across from them. Linus sees me eventually, though, and says, "Hold that thought, will you?" My brother is obviously annoyed with the shift in his friends' attention. Stephen looks expectantly at me, as well.

"So I heard Jeanine came and took you with her?" Linus asks, but it's not really a question. "I don't think she's ever done that before," adds Stephen. "She's not usually all that interested in the initiates."

I shrug, and ask my brother, "Caleb, what are you going to be working on?"

I'm in Kandell's neurochemistry lab. They're studying the roots of aggression – it's fascinating, really." Caleb has always been interested in the brain, so I understand now why he was so pleased when he left the second aptitude test room.

"Molecular genetics for me," offers Linus.

"Astrophysics," says Stephen. "Nice try changing the subject, though. What are you doing with Jeanine? They say her lab is working on something big. What's it like?"

"I didn't see her lab." I respond, becoming nervous. I can see I will not be able to dodge their curiosity.

"Well, where did she take you?" Linus presses.

"To her office." I reply.

"And…?"

I scramble for some kind of answer that will satisfy them. "I think it's going to be some kind of leadership training." It's the best I can come up with, and I curse myself for not thinking of something better on the way here.

"Wow," says Linus. "I wonder why she picked you." It's clear he's more than a little jealous.

Amy, Emma, and Laura arrive and start to tell the boys where they've been assigned. Amy tells them she'll be working on a pacification serum. It's a good fit for someone from Amity. Emma and Laura were both assigned to the hydroponics lab. Lunch arrives and they all start eating and chatting amongst themselves. My thoughts return to the scene I witnessed in Dauntless. I had always seen them as defenders – boisterous, yes, but not crazy. I'm shocked at the thought of them turning their aggression on each other. Maybe Jeanine is right that someone should be keeping an eye on what they're doing. It occurs to me that it might have been me dangling over that bridge, had I made a different choice. It's hard to believe the choosing ceremony was only yesterday. I wonder if I would have been able to hold on long enough. Would Four have rushed to my aid, too? What would that have been like?

"Earth to Beatrice, come in please…" teases my brother, waving his hand in front of my face. "Where were you just now?"

"Sorry, just daydreaming." I answer.

"You were smiling." He probes.

"I was just thinking how much I like it here". I'm struck by how much easier lying is, every time I do it.

"Yeah, me too." He turns his attention back to Amy, and it becomes clear that his interest is more than polite, despite his Abnegation-born reserve. I don't want to interfere, and I return to my musings. Four's face appears unbidden and it occurs to me that there is something familiar about it, but I can't think why.

"Beatrice, are you coming with us?" Amy asks.

"Where?"

"To the pool."

I look at my brother to see if he wants me there. He nods to me imperceptibly and his eyes plead. I realize that other than me, he's never been alone with a girl before.

"Sure."

Linus, Stephen, and Emma follow us as well, but Laura says she wants to go back to her room and read. We follow Caleb into the elevator and he directs it. We step off and follow him down a series of twisting hallways.

"Anyone would think you grew up here," chuckles Stephen.

"I've been studying the floorplans." Answers Caleb. _Of course he has._

The hallway opens into a huge white tiled room with a domed ceiling and a giant indoor swimming pool. I've never seen so much water in one place before, and the sight of it is almost dizzying. About half of it is roped off into lanes and I can see people calmly swimming back and forth across the length of the pool. Another section is apparently intended for recreation. I can see it is shallower and there are a number of young children laughing and splashing each other.

"I guess you guys don't know how to swim, huh?" Stephen asks.

"No, but it looks fun," answers Amy.

"Isn't it a bit wasteful to use all this water just for amusement?" asks Emma.

"I guess I never thought of it like that, it's always been here." replies Linus, thoughtfully.

"Swimsuits are over here." Stephen gestures toward a row of dressing rooms. It occurs to me that I'm about to be wearing a lot less clothing than I'm used to. Caleb seems untroubled by it, though. I resolve to be brave. _I'm Erudite now, right?_

Once we're in our swimsuits, I walk over to the edge of the pool and dip my toe in. The water is deliciously cool. I lean forward a bit more to put my whole foot in.

"C'mon, don't be chicken!" Linus pushes Caleb into the pool and Stephen pushes me at the same time. I plunge into the water and am terrified. I don't even know which way is up, but I know I have to calm myself. I open my eyes and see the bubbles rising and kick my feet in the same direction. I break the surface and gasp for air at the same time as my brother. His face is red with anger, but I am exhilarated.

"Not cool!" he shouts at Linus.

"Oh, it's very cool," replies Linus as he eases himself into the pool.

"You know what I mean."

"Yeah, but if you're going to be Erudite, you've gotta learn to like water sooner or later," grins Stephen.

I look over and see Amy and Emma easing themselves into the shallow end. Emma looks apprehensive, but Amy is enraptured. I leave Caleb with the boys and make my way over to them.

"I can't believe they have a swimming pool!" she tips her head back to wet her hair and does a slow roll, wetting every part of herself. She turns to Emma, "C'mon, hold my hand." Emma takes it and wades in slowly. "Don't worry, I won't let anything happen to you."

We spend the next couple of hours relaxing at the pool, but my skin starts to pucker and I decide it's time to get out. The others are in no hurry, though, so I dress quickly and tell them I'll see them at dinner. The Erudite headquarters seem to be filled with wonders, and I want to see what else is here.

I make my way back to my room, and tap the monitor at the head of my bed. "Erudite floorplans, please." The calm female voice of the computer responds. "There are 114 unrestricted levels, which would you like to see?" I wonder how many restricted levels there are. Remembering our entrance yesterday, I ask, "Show me how to get to the atrium with the waterfall." The monitor cycles through a series of maps, with arrows indicating direction. I quickly memorize them and head out the door.

When I arrive, the atrium is even more beautiful than I remember. I find a bench and sit down, taking in all the activity around me. Dozens of people walk to and fro, all dressed in blue. A few small children play with their parents. An old man nods off. There are several groups huddled around chess tables. Across the square there is a young couple. He is seated on the bench and she is reclining, her head in his lap. He is reading something to her aloud from a handheld computer pad and she is looking up at him adoringly. He bends to plant a kiss on her lips and I look away. My first instinct is to be embarrassed, but I realize I am curious, too.

Most of all, I am struck by how peaceful it all is.

 **A/N: Thanks for reading and please let me know what you think. This chapter is a bit slow, but I thought it was necessary to take a break from the watchers and let Beatrice take in some more of what Erudite has to offer. The next chapter will be called "Dauntless: A Field Guide" – I think it will be pretty interesting.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	9. Chapter 9 Dauntless: A Field Guide

The next morning after breakfast we are led by Athena to a computer lab for training in problem solving. First, we're given a test to see how well we discern patterns. We're shown groups of colored shapes on one half on the screen, and have to identify which shape on the right will complete the pattern. The screen emits a 'ding' sound for correct answers, and a 'beep' for every incorrect answer. Caleb is next to me and I can see out of the corner of my eye that he is becoming increasingly frustrated every time his screen beeps. Amy is on his other side and tells him, "just relax and see that pattern.", but that only serves to annoy him more.

I finish first, as Athena cheerfully announces, "Beatrice Prior, first through, and with a perfect score!" I'm shocked and I can tell everyone else is as well. Several of the Erudite initiates shoot me angry looks. I regret drawing attention to myself.

After the test, the computer takes us through a series of problem solving exercises. Athena tells us that the computer is constantly measuring our abilities and tailoring the questions to match our level. It is exhausting. After what seems like hours of this, I look up at the clock and see that it is finally approaching noon.

"Ok everyone, good work today. Go get some lunch. You'll be reporting to your labs for the afternoon. See you tomorrow."

Caleb is sullen over lunch, and I can sense the other initiates have cooled towards me as well. Even Amy is uncharacteristically short with me. I quickly eat my lunch and resolve to draw less attention to myself. Hopefully I'll be able to catch Caleb alone later today.

After lunch I take the elevator down to the basement and make my way through the rocky corridor to the Watchers. When I enter the Dauntless room, Arnold is at his desk, dressed in the same clothes as yesterday and looking as if he never left. Ethel and Julius are still working at the same frenetic pace at the other walls.

"Good, you're here" says Arnold, without looking up. "Pull up a chair." I do as I'm told and he turns to face me.

"What did Jeanine tell you about what we're watching for in the Dauntless?"

"She said that Erudite had become aware of threats from within the City – that's pretty much it."

Ah, well, if anything's going to happen, it's going to start in Dauntless."

"What do you mean?"

He pauses, and I can tell he's trying to decide how much he should tell me. "We think Dauntless may be planning a move on Abnegation. To overthrow the government."

My heart drops. I had thought that Erudite was the source of anger at the Abnegation. Their overthrow might have been a peaceful one, at least. A Dauntless coup would certainly not be a bloodless. I swallow but my mouth has gone dry.

"You and your brother certainly made a smart choice, leaving." I nod. _What about my parents?_

As if he read my thoughts, he continues, "If it starts, we'll be able to warn the Abnegation, and protect our own people, of course." He pauses and glances back at the screens.

"What we're doing essentially is collecting massive amounts of data on their social hierarchy and behavioral patterns. We're already able to predict most of the decisions of their leaders with a fair bit of accuracy. I think we can do better, though, and so does Jeanine."

"Let's start at square one though, shall we?" He taps a few keys and a photo of a dark-skinned man in his early thirties appears on the center screen. "This is Max – he's the leader. Now, the first thing you have to understand about Dauntless society is that it is extremely hierarchical. They believe that their sole purpose in life is to protect our city from the factionless, and what lies outside the fence."

"Isn't it?" I ask. I really want to ask what's outside the fence, but I don't dare.

"Well, sure, but they believe their ability to protect us depends on total loyalty and obedience to their leaders. It's all about complete suppression of their own free will – suppression of intellect." I can tell he finds this idea distasteful.

"That's why the fear training is so important to them. That level of obedience is only possible because they're trained to completely suppress their own fear. It's fascinating, really. Dauntless children are actually _encouraged_ to do dangerous things."

I try to imagine my mother urging me to run with scissors, but I can't. Instead I see a flash of the last time she cut my hair. It smarts, so I brush it away and try to concentrate on what Arnold is telling me.

"Fear training?" I ask.

"Initiate training involves a series of simulations involving a special serum that stimulates the amygdala. While they're in the simulations, they experience their own worse fears." There is a hint of something in Arnold's voice now, it almost sounds like admiration.

"Anyways, since Max became the leader about eighteen months ago, things have gotten a lot more violent. By the way, we're pretty sure he had a hand in the death of his predecessor."

He glances my way, to see what my reaction is to this last statement. My horror must have shown on my face, and he betrays a faint smile.

"Yeah, the old leader, Amar, was a pretty decent guy – by Dauntless standards, of course. It used to be duty, valor and honor, but now it's pretty much kill or be killed over there."

Despite my discomfort at discovering the Erudite have been spying on everyone, including themselves, I'm starting to think I made the right call not choosing Dauntless. It's difficult to reconcile what I saw yesterday in the chasm and what Arnold is telling me now with the carefree and fun image I always had of them. I used to love watching them jump from the train every morning, but I wonder if that was just a childish fascination.

"I know, you were thinking they were all blue hair, tattoos, and wild parties, huh?" Arnold chuckles. "Actually, there is still quite a bit of that, but we'll get to that in a moment." He pauses to bring up two new photos. "These are the other members of the leadership council." He points to the image of a blond-haired man in his late thirties. "That's Harrison on the left, and that's Andrasta", he nods toward a strikingly beautiful red-haired woman with green eyes. "They're meant to lead as a triumvirate, and that's how it used to be, but now that Max has taken over, they're really just figureheads. Andrasta chaffs against it a bit, but she doesn't have enough support to overthrow him, and Harrison is too scared."

Now Arnold pulls up a photo of younger man with a ring through his nose and multiple tattoos. "You've already met this one," he sighs.

"Eric." I reply.

"Right. Would you believe he was a transfer from Erudite? His parents are both well-regarded mathematicians. So much for genetics," shrugs Arnold.

It's hard to imagine him as a little boy in Erudite, playing happily in the atrium, or splashing in the pool.

"Max put him in charge of training the initiates this year, and since then, that process has gotten a lot scarier."

"Why did he make the girl hang over the chasm?" I ask.

"Last night we rolled the training room footage back and it seems Eric felt she gave up a fight with a fellow initiate too easily. Now Eric makes them fight until one of them is incapacitated. They weed out about half of the initiates – the ones Eric doesn't think are violent enough.

"What happens to them?"

"They become factionless", replies Arnold. "The most disturbing part of all this is that Max has made him his protégé – so you're looking at the future of Dauntless right there."

"He seems young."

"He's eighteen. That's not particularly uncommon in Dauntless. You don't see too many elderly Dauntless members."

"What happens to them?" I ask.

"When they're no longer useful as soldiers, they get the option of becoming factionless, or committing suicide. The chasm's a popular choice for that." I shudder, remembering what I saw yesterday.

"You remember Four? He and Eric were in the same initiate class. Four was ranked first, Eric came in second, and you can bet he's never forgotten it. That's part of why Eric hates him so much."

"Why else?" I ask, suddenly curious about Four.

"Well it's just a theory, but Four was Amar's protégé and I think Eric's always been a bit jealous, even though Max is in power now. Personality-wise, they're polar opposites. Eric is loud and brash, Four is more old-guard Dauntless – quiet and more thoughtful. Brave, though – but in a more subtle way."

"You like him."

Arnold smiles sheepishly. "I suppose I do. Jeanine's told us to keep a particularly close eye on him."

"Why?"

"That's something I'm not allowed to tell you yet. Jeanine will explain if she decides you're ready. Suffice to say he may be a bit different than the others."

I know better than to probe any further. "Tell me about the rankings, why are they so important?"

"Ah, yes, the rankings are everything. If you're below the half-way point then you're out. Factionless. Beyond that, if you're in the bottom half that stays, it's guard duty at the fence, and they don't last long out there. The first-ranked initiate gets their choice of jobs – and they usually join the leadership, though Four chose the control room. We don't know why."

"Maybe he likes to spy on people." Like so many times, the words are out of my mouth before I realize it might not have been the wisest remarks. Arnold looks irritated.

"Funnily enough, that thought had occurred to me."

I can tell he's offended, and he adds, "I was a sociologist before I came here."

"You're still a sociologist," interjects Ethel. I had almost forgotten they were there.

"A zoologist, more like!" adds Julius. Arnold shoots him a withering look and Julius looks chastened.

Arnold spends the rest of the afternoon flipping through images, pointing out most of the adult members of Dauntless who reside in their headquarters. In addition to the leadership, training, and security staff, there is a very large medical staff. Not surprising, given how the Dauntless spend their time. Additionally, there are cooks, janitors, shopkeepers, teachers, and a surprisingly large number of tattoo artists. I wonder, idly, what tattoos I would have gotten if I had joined them. Arnold also shows me many of the public areas, including the aptly named "Pit", where members meet to spar and socialize. The main dining hall is far more functional than ours, but there is a distinctly more communal feel to it, rather than the formality of the Erudite.

Finally, Arnold stops. "It looks like you've hit your saturation point. Go get some dinner. Tomorrow should be interesting. Four's going to teach knife-throwing to the initiates."

 **A/N Thanks for reading and please let me know what you think. Historical note: Andrasta is named for the Icenic goddess of war. According to Wikipedia, her name was invoked by Boudica in her fight against the Roman occupation of Britain in AD 60.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	10. Chapter 10 The Other Divergent

I return to the Great Hall for dinner. Caleb barely acknowledges me, but the others seem to have forgotten the events of this morning. As I take a seat at the table with them, Linus is describing the molecular genetics lab he is working in.

"It's amazing, they've been able to identify hundreds of different single nucleotide polymorphisms that jointly predict faction choice. Pretty soon, they won't need the aptitude test, they'll just take a few drops of your blood, and they'll be able to tell you where you belong. It's all right there in your DNA"

"But you'd still have a choice, wouldn't you?" asks Amy.

"Wouldn't you rather know with certainty where you belonged? Then you wouldn't have to make the choice." Linus responds.

"I think we should still have a choice. Even Jeanine says so," interjects Emma.

"Anyways, what we're working on now is way bigger." Linus pauses, for effect, and looks around to make sure he has everyone's attention. "Now we're looking for a way to detect _divergence._ " He's whispering now. "Jeanine's told the lab to drop everything else and work only on this."

It's as if my heart has dropped into my abdomen. I strain to hear what he's saying over the din of the hall.

"What's divergence?" queries Laura.

"Divergents are people who have something wrong with their brains, it makes them not fit into their faction."

"You mean like the factionless?"

"Not exactly - it's more than that. They have aptitude for more than one faction, and it renders them incapable of keeping their promises to their factions' creeds. That's what makes them dangerous, they're incapable of being loyal. That's how Jeanine explained it to us, anyways."

"Wow, I feel bad for them, it must be so confusing." offers Amy.

"Jeanine says they're a threat to our city, and they need to be found."

I find my voice and try to make it sound as casual as possible. "What will you do with them, when you find them?" I ask.

Linus looks surprised at this question. "I don't know. She didn't say. We're just supposed to develop a rapid blood test."

I glance over to Caleb and our eyes meet. His are wide with fear. _Is he divergent?_ It had never occurred to me before, but if divergence is genetic, it is possible Caleb has inherited it as well, given our mother's admission to me the night before the choosing. I pull my eyes from him.

"How close do you think you are to developing the test?" I ask.

"Oh, I don't know. There's a big difference between finding a marker that is associated with increased risk and developing a diagnostic test. It could be years." Linus shrugs. "Plus we'd need a pretty large sample of divergents to test it."

I can feel my shoulders relax at hearing this, but a quick glance at my brother tells me his fear, if anything, has been intensified.

Linus continues, "To hear Jeanine talk, they're lurking around every corner, but my lab mentor says they're pretty rare. After she left, he told me he really doesn't understand the reason for her obsession, but it's apparently all she talks about nowadays."

"Weird," says Stephen.

"Yeah, weird. But still, who cares? It's fascinating work." Linus answers. If only they knew that it was my fate, and possibly my brother's, too, that they were so casually discussing. Given their scientific detachment, I'm glad they don't.

After dinner, on the way back to our rooms, I finally get a chance to get Caleb alone. I pull him into a dark recess that I hope isn't being monitored by one of the watchers' cameras.

"Caleb, we need to talk."

"What is it?"

I search his eyes. "You know."

"I don't know what you're talking about," he responds. _Fine, have it your way._

I try another tack. "You haven't asked me why I chose Erudite." I say.

"I assumed your aptitude results were Erudite. You certainly seem to be doing well here." There's an edge in his voice as he says those last words.

"What were _your_ results?" I ask.

"Erudite, of course." he answers. I search his eyes and wonder if perhaps I was wrong about him. But if that's the case, why did he react so strongly when Linus started talking about divergents? I try once more.

"Do you like the work you're doing in the lab?"

Again, I detect discomfort. _So that's it. But why?_

"Sure, why do you ask?" _He's deflecting._

"You've been quiet," I counter.

"So have you."

"True, but you first," I smile. _Why is it so hard for us to talk now?_ I followed him here because I couldn't bear to be without any family at all, but I've never felt such a distance from him.

To my relief, the words start to pour out of him.

"I told you we are studying the roots of aggression, and that much is true," he begins. "When they assigned me, I assumed the reason was to _prevent_ aggression. Today, I found out that's not it at all."

"What then?" I ask.

"We're supposed to develop a serum that _brings out_ aggression."

"Why?"

"I don't know. But they've already got a prototype serum and they've begun testing it."

"How are they testing it, Caleb?"

"I don't know everything, just what goes on in the lab."

"And?" I demand. "Are they testing it on animals?"

"You could say that," Caleb won't meet my eyes now. "Let's just say it's pretty disturbing."

I can see tears forming in his eyes now.

"This isn't how I thought it would be." he says, his voice shaking. I reach out and touch him arm.

"I know."

"I'm so glad you are here, Beatrice. I was angry when you chose Erudite, I thought you were selfish for leaving mother and father, but I couldn't bear it if I were alone now."

He squares his shoulders now and looks at me. "You haven't told me anything about what you and Jeanine are up to."

"I'm not really working with Jeanine, I only talked with her for a bit yesterday, then she took me somewhere else."

"Where?"

"Deep underground. Listen, Caleb, you have to be careful. The Erudite are spying on all of the other factions. I'm in the Dauntless room, and there are cameras everywhere. There was an Erudite room, too, but I haven't seen inside. They told me Dauntless is planning to attack Abnegation, but I know they're not telling me everything." It's such a relief to be able to talk to someone, and I can tell he feels the same.

"Well Beatrice, we both got more than we bargained for, huh?"

"Yes, but Caleb, we won't let them change us, will we?"

"No, we won't let them."

He looks around nervously. "We should probably get back to our rooms, we'll be missed."

"OK, I'll see you tomorrow."

"Goodnight."

When I get back to our room, Amy is still up, brushing her long red hair in front of the mirror.

"Where have you been?" she asks.

"Oh, just chatting with Caleb."

"Really, did he say anything about me?" asks Amy, eagerly.

"Um, no – do you want me to talk to him for you?" _Amy would be good for him._

"Oh no, I couldn't ask you to do that."

"It's no trouble."

Amy hops over to me and plants a kiss on my cheek. "Thank you, thank you!"

I don't know what to say and I'm embarrassed by the affection. "We should get some sleep, aren't you exhausted?"

"Yes, definitely!"

I quickly ready myself for bed and turn the lights out. Sleep eludes me, though. I cycle through all the events of the day. I'm glad Caleb finally opened up to me, but I still have the feeling he's not telling me everything. Maybe he'll be able to talk to Amy. My mind wanders further. Now I'm back at dinner time, when Linus was talking about Jeanine's search for Divergents.

 _"…it's apparently all she talks about nowadays."_ Linus had said.

Then it's as if one more tumbler in a lock has fallen into place, as I recall Arnold's words about Four from earlier today.

 _"Jeanine's told us to keep a particularly close eye on him…"_

And then this.

 _"…Suffice to say he may be a bit different than the others."_

Four is like me. Four is Divergent. The next thought that enters my mind surprises me most of all.

 _I have to warn him._

 **A/N Thanks for reading and please let me know what you think. I don't know about you, but it's killing me that they haven't even met yet. There's still a few things that need to happen before then, but I'll try and make it quick!**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	11. Chapter 11 The Guardian

Surprisingly, I slept well, despite the ruminations of the night before. After problem solving and lunch I make my way down to the Watchers. I had bolted down my lunch, barely chewing, much to the others' amusement.

"What the big hurry?" Linus had asked me.

"Nothing, I just want to get to my lab."

"You still haven't told us what you're working on…" probed Stephen.

"That's right, I haven't!"

And with that, I had run off. Though that did leave the lingering question of why I was so eager to get down here.

"Ah, there you are, just in time," smiled Arnold when I entered the Dauntless room. "I have to admit, knife-throwing never gets old." He expands the training room screen to fill his entire wall. The initiates, all dressed in black, are standing together. Even after a just few days, they look tougher than before. Their posture is different - more erect. Some of them are sporting new tattoos. Many of them have bruises on their faces and arms, but it only adds to the air of ruggedness about them. They are gathered around Four, who is holding up a knife and pointing to different parts of the blade and handle. Eric is there as well, but is leaning against the wall, watching the initiates.

"Why is Four teaching them today?" I ask.

On the wall is a row of human-shaped targets. Four launches three knives in quick succession and hits three different targets, dead center.

"That's why," chuckled Arnold. "Eric's terrible at knife throwing, but he'll never let the initiates know that. It takes practice and concentration; Eric could never be bothered with that sort of thing."

Now the initiates are lined up in front of the targets, throwing knife after knife at the targets. Four made it look easy, but most of them miss entirely and the knives fall to the floor. Occasionally, one sticks to the wall, but none with the kind of precision Four displayed. I wonder how long it took him to learn that. He walks back and forth among the initiates, pausing to correct them or guide their arms and wrists. As always, Four fascinates me. Is it that he might be Divergent like me? I'm not sure that's the only reason. Gradually, the initiates' aim improves and they start hitting their targets with more frequency. Their increased confidence is almost visible. As unsettling as some of the revelations about Dauntless have been, there are still moments when I wish I'd chosen differently. This is one of them.

One boy on the end who has failed to hit the target even once runs out of knives. As he walks forward to pick them up, the others stop throwing, but Eric springs off the wall and is shouting at him. He motions to the boy to stand in front of one of the targets, and grabs a knife. The boy is clearly terrified, and appears to be fighting back tears. As Eric pulls his arm back, about to throw, Four grabs his wrist, stopping it in midair. Eric glares at him, but Four is resolute. They argue, and Eric appears to concede. Four takes the knife in his own hand and to my horror throws it at the boy. I dread looking, but I have to. The boy is standing completely still, and the knife is lodged in the target, barely millimeters above his head. Four looks back at Eric, and Eric nods. The boy's chest is heaving with relief, but Four looks mildly ashamed of himself. Eric leaves, and the lesson continues.

"If Eric had thrown that knife that boy would probably be dead." Arnold says, shaking his head. "Still, Eric will find a way to make Four pay for interfering, you'll see." He pauses, squinting at the screen. "All of these interactions are important, and we track them. Why? It's not enough to know who is _supposed_ to be in charge, we also need to track who has _influence._ Who do people listen to? If war breaks out, we need to know who we could approach."

"Not Eric, I guess." I say.

"Right, definitely not Eric - but maybe Four. He could be reasoned with. Perhaps _._ "

A thought occurs to me and I seize it. "Is that why Jeanine wants him watched?"

Arnold purses his lips, thinking. "It may be one of the reasons, but I don't think it's the only one." He seems disinclined to tell me anymore, and I don't want to raise suspicion by asking any more questions.

Later on as I make my way down the now familiar rock-walled hallway, once again I pass the library. I should be at dinner now. I will be missed, but I am too curious to pass it by one more time. I push on the door, and to my surprise, it yields easily. I glance nervously around the hallway but there is no one in sight. I hold my breath, and enter.

It's the most amazing sight. The library is an enormous cavern at least 20 stories high, and appears to be carved out of solid white stone. Rows upon rows of shelves hold countless books. There is no space that is not filled with them. A network of ladders and staircases led up and down the levels. Who built this?, and why?, I wonder. It looks much older than the rest of the Erudite headquarters.

I quickly climb down one of the ladders and start surveying the books. This appears to be a section on Art History. I wish I knew how the library was organized. It's not as if I can just walk up to the computer and ask for a book about Divergents.

"Are you lost?" I freeze, surprised that I had heard no one approaching. I grope for an Erudite answer and turn around. It is the Guardian who has discovered me. Close up, he appears even older than he had on that first night in Erudite. His face is so deeply lined it almost appears scarred, and even the folds of his blue robes appear ancient.

"I was just curious what was in here."

"I see. We don't get many visitors here anymore, now that all the books have been scanned and uploaded to the Erudite server."

"It's beautiful."

"Yes," he smiles faintly. "I've been blind for fifty years, but I remember. I still know where every book is"

I am surprised by my boldness. "I've heard that you can remember before the Fall."

"I was only a young boy, four or five. I don't remember much, only fragments, like a dream. But still..."

"And you remember the rise of the factions?"

"Yes, my parents were both professors at the University. When it started to get bad, they built this library deep underground, and scoured the city to save as many books as possible. They and the others who founded Erudite were determined to preserve the knowledge of our people. Now they are all gone, of course, and it falls to me to be Guardian. The library used to be the center of life here, but that time is gone. The priorities of our faction have changed." He sighs. "Walk with me?"

I follow him, wondering how he is able to navigate the steep and winding staircases at his age, and without the aid of sight.

"Tell me, young lady, what is your name?'

"Beatrice." As soon as I say it, I realize I should have given a different name.

For at least an hour, we wander the library, the Guardian leading, and me trailing behind, searching the shelves for anything that might contain answers about what I am. He pauses every few minutes to tell me about a section of books, or a particularly interesting single volume. I realize it would take me years to find a book here on my own. Still, it's pleasant to listen to his voice, and I realize with sadness how much I must have missed out on, not knowing any of my own grandparents.

"Well, I suppose you had better run off and get some supper, my dear." To my surprise, I realize we are back at the door through which I had entered. I have so many questions, but it's clear I'm being dismissed. I turn to exit, but as I do so, the Guardian speaks again.

"Beatrice."

"Yes?"

He pulls a small, worn, leather-bound book from a hidden pocket in his robe. "I believe this is the book you were looking for?" It's not a question. _He knows._ I take it from him, wordlessly, and stuff it into my pocket.

I go straight to my room, knowing Amy and the others will still be at dinner. Only then do I dare take the book from my pocket. There is no title or any other indication of what it is on the outside. When I open it however, the first page reads, " _A Brief History of the Factions"_ by R.C. Prior, PhD.

 **A/N Thanks for reading and please let me know what you think. I had in mind the library at the Peabody Conservatory when I was imagining the library here. Google it, it's beautiful.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	12. Chapter 12 A Brief History

I quickly turn to the next page and start reading.

 _Preface._ _In the wake of the Great War, the founders, in their great wisdom, wished to preserve those ideals which might have prevented the war had they been in existence in sufficient concentration._ _Those ideals were selflessness, love, honesty, bravery, and curiosity._ _The city was cleared of all inhabitants, and one by one, individuals were allowed back into the city if they could demonstrate an aptitude and willingness to preserve one of the five virtues._ _When they entered the city, they joined the faction corresponding to their virtue:_ _Abnegation, Amity, Candor, Dauntless or Erudite._ _Those who did not meet this standard were banished, left to starve in the dry, barren wasteland surrounding the city._ _This included so-called "divergent" individuals, who embodied more than one of these virtues._ _Why the founders chose to banish the Divergents is an open question, but I hope to address the reasons later in this volume._ _While they believed such individuals were dangerous to the balance of our fragile new society, I believe they are the only hope for the survival of our civilization._

I hear Amy's laughter approaching in the hallway and I stuff the book under my mattress. I had hoped to have much more time.

"Where were you? We were worried about you." Her concern is genuine.

"I wasn't feeling well." I respond.

"You look pale. I brought you a snack." She produces a delicious-looking blueberry muffin, wrapped in a cloth dinner napkin, from her pocket. I smile and greedily take it from her outstretched hand. I hadn't realized how hungry I was.

"Thanks, Amy."

"At least you still have your appetite," she smiles.

I want to change the subject. "How are things going with Caleb?" I ask.

"Good, I think. I hope, anyways." She looks at my shyly. I remember then what I had promised her.

"I'm sorry, Amy, I haven't gotten a chance to talk to him yet, but I will." Tomorrow is Visitor's Day. "Maybe I can introduce you to our parents tomorrow?" I offer.

Her smile brightens. "That would be great! I can't wait to see my family."

We take turns readying ourselves for bed and she turns the lights off. I don't dare pull the book out, though it has filled me with even more questions. In school, we were taught that all of the survivors of the Great War had joined a faction, but now it seems that was a lie. The fence must have been built to keep out those who had been banished. It is a horrible thought. We had been taught that the founders were noble, saving the last remnants of humanity. Now they seem only cruel to me. And what about the Divergents? I realize I had been thinking of myself as some kind of mutant, but if we have existed since before the Fall, maybe that isn't true? But why are we so dangerous? Is it truly an issue of loyalty? I ask myself, to whom am I loyal? I know the answer should be Erudite. I know that my choice was not only a choice, but a promise. But what about the Watchers? Despite my fascination, I know that what they are doing – no, what _we_ are doing is wrong. And then there what's going on in Caleb's lab. I know he didn't tell me everything. Perhaps we should have both stayed in Abnegation. I dismiss the thought as soon as it enters my mind. I know we left because we, neither of us, could have lived wedged into that mold. I do know something terrible is coming, I just wish I knew the source. Is it as Arnold and Jeanine say? That the Dauntless are planning to overthrow Abnegation, and Erudite is working to prevent it? Arnold may believe that, but I suspect Jeanine would be all too happy to step into the void of leadership that would be left if Abnegation fell. Her speech on that first night was telling. Another, more disturbing thought, occurs to me. What if Erudite is in fact _engineering_ the coming Dauntless attack on Abnegation? No, that's impossible, right?

Just before sleep claims me, an even more impossible thought enters. Jeanine wants to replace Abnegation with Erudite. Such a shift would rock the foundations of our faction system. It would likely survive, though. But if the Divergents were to rise up, what then?

I wake to the sound of Amy humming to herself in the mirror. I rub the sleep from my eyes and peer at her. Could it be morning already? She sees me in the mirror and laughs.

"C'mon, sleepyhead! Don't you want to see your parents?"

I shower and dress, and join the others as we walk to cafeteria. There we will join our parents for breakfast and spend the rest of the morning with them. It will be the last time we see them until after initiation. It may be the last time we ever see them. I find Caleb and our eyes meet. We are both dreading the meeting. I wonder if the distance we have both placed between ourselves and our parents is insurmountable. It's not just the Choosing, it's everything after, as well. I take a deep breath, and feel Caleb, next to me, do the same.

We are the last to enter the cafeteria. All around us, the sea of blue is punctuated by parents dressed in the colors of their own factions, embracing each of our new friends. The visual effect is jarring, after a week of seeing only blue. We search the crowd for our parents, but they are not here. Caleb, taller than me by at least six inches, is also craning his neck, looking around. I watch him slowly come to the realization that I have already reached. With an odd sort of detachment, I note how much more heartbreaking it is to watch the emotions I have just felt play out visibly on my brother's face. Hope, fear, shock, sadness.

Amy sees us, and immediately reads the situation. She beckons us over to meet her family, and Caleb seems to brighten a bit. He goes to her, and I am thankful that Caleb has someone to be with. I, on the other hand, am completely alone. There is a tap on my shoulder. I turn, and a man I've never seen before is standing there.

"Jeanine would like to see you in her office."

"Why?"

"I imagine you'll find that out when you get there," he replies, smugly. "Follow me."

I trail him down the hallway and into the elevator. He looks straight ahead, and so do I. When it stops, the door opens and I walk into her office. She is by the window, looking out over the city. Her arms are folded. When she hears me, she turns and smiles. I am relieved.

"Sit down, Beatrice." She motions to the chairs we had sat in the first time I was here. We both sit, and she leans forward. "How are things going for you here?"

"OK, I guess."

"You're making friends?"

"Yes, a few."

"I know it must be hard for you and Caleb, you weren't taught to be outgoing, but it's important that you feel part of our community."

I nod. She relaxes back into the chair and crosses her legs. I do likewise.

"Arnold tells me you're doing well. He says you're quite insightful. I was right about you." She looks almost triumphant as she says these last words. I don't know what to say. Accepting complements is always hard for the Abnegation, and this one is for something I'm not necessarily proud of.

"I'm not sure why he would say that, mostly I just ask questions."

"Ah, but I'll tell you a secret, Beatrice. It's by their questions that people reveal their intelligence, not their answers."

I don't know what to say to this, but it's clear she is expecting some reply, so I decide to be bold.

"Arnold says you want us to watch Four, in particular." I study her face carefully. She doesn't appear at all disturbed by this question.

"And you want to know why? Clever girl. Do you know who he was, before he joined Dauntless?"

I shake my head no.

"Well, no matter. I'm told your parents didn't come today. How do you feel about that?"

I'm not sure how I should respond. "I'm not sure, honestly." It's the truth.

"I called you up here to make sure you were OK. I've been worried about you." She sounds genuine.

"I'm OK."

She sighs. "Of course, they've done this to punish you, but you'll see in time that they've actually done you a favor. I was Erudite born, of course, but I remember initiation well. It took my transfer friends several days to recover from Visitor's Day. There were many tears that night. So unnecessary. I've tried to put an end to it, but tradition still holds sway here. In the end, you have to realize that your old life is gone. It's that simple."

I know she is right. "I do realize it, now."

She seems satisfied with my answer. "I'm glad we were able to chat."

I sense the talk is over, so I stand to leave. She walks over to her desk and takes something out.

"Beatrice? One more thing." I freeze. She is holding the Guardian's book in her hand. It's clear to me now that this is the real reason I'm here.

"Y-yes?"

"Where did you get this book? The cleaning staff found it in your room."

I don't want to endanger the Guardian. "I found it in the library."

"What were you doing down there?"

"I was walking by it on the way back from the Watchers and I noticed the sign, and I was curious."

Her shoulders relax, visibly. "You _are_ like me. I spent many hours wandering among those shelves as a young girl. Of course, it's all completely unnecessary now. Wasted space, really. Was there something in particular about this book that caught your attention?"

"It didn't have a cover." I've realized that unlike in Abnegation, pleading curiosity is a sure way to avoid suspicion here. It works again.

"The faction system is fundamental to our society. No one believes in it more than I do. If you have questions about it, I hope you'll come to me. You should know many of the things in this book are not true. And there are some thing we in Erudite still don't know about the early days of the Founders. Only the Abnegation have those answers, and they keep that information hidden from the rest of us."

"Why would they do that?" I ask.

"We don't really know. But knowledge is power, and perhaps they are using it to control the rest of us. The Abnegation are not as innocent as you might think. You chose the right side."

"Aren't we all on the same side?"

"I hope so, Beatrice. You may go now."

She makes no move to return the book, and I realize it is lost to me forever. I step onto the elevator and the door closes. I wonder if she is right about the book being untrue. Either way, it's clear I will have to find a new source of information.

 **A/N** **Thanks for reading and please let me know what you think.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	13. Chapter 13 An Excursion

Everyone else is still with their families and I have nowhere to go. I think about finding Caleb, but I don't know what to say, and I don't want to interfere if he is with Amy. I head to the atrium to clear my head. The first time I was here, only a few short days ago, everything had been beautiful. I find a bench and sit down. Now as I look around, it is as if a shadow has fallen over it all. I don't belong here. If they found my book so quickly, it means I am being watched very closely. Perhaps they are watching everyone. The idea is horrifying, and for a moment I feel dizzy. And guilty, because I, too, am a Watcher. I can't breath, and I need to get out of Erudite now. I start taking slow, deep breaths like we were taught in Abnegation. The panic subsides, but the urge to leave is still there. Could I sneak out? Where would I go? I look around me and see the main door leading into the atrium. Could it be that simple? If I am caught, at least I can say I didn't think I was doing anything wrong. Just out for a breath of fresh air. It would raise suspicion, yes, but it would be less damning than if I were caught in the middle of a more complex plan to escape. That's it, I'll just walk out the front door after dinner tonight, walk around a bit, and come back. Completely innocent. I feel better already.

The shadows lift and the atrium begins to look normal again. I realize I'm tired and rest my head against my arm. I am lulled by the gentle clicking of the pieces on the chess board and the occasional laughter of young children. I must have been even more tired than I thought, because the next thing I know, I am being shaken awake by Caleb.

"I've been looking everywhere for you."

I stretch and yawn. "Did you have a good time with Amy's family?"

He looks slightly embarrassed. "They're nice."

"You know she likes you, right?"

"Yeah, I wasn't sure until today, but…"

"She's a nice girl. I'm glad you have someone here."

"You're the only one here I trust."

"Caleb, you know you could tell me anything, right?" He doesn't take the invitation, though.

"Yeah, I know." He takes a deep breath and looks around. "Beatrice, you're alone too much. Some of the others initiates have noticed. You should go out with us. You should date."

I can't think of anything more unpleasant, but I know he's right. I have to at least appear to be fitting in.

"Who did you have in mind?"

"How about Stephen?"

"He pushed me into the pool." I say, dryly.

"Okay, okay what about Linus then?"

"Fine." At least I'll have Amy there with me, I think to myself.

Caleb smiles, clearly relieved he won't be on a date alone with her. He helps me to my feet.

"We should be in our labs by now. See you at dinner." He starts to walk away, but then turns back.

"I almost forgot, Amy said to give you this." It's another muffin, just like before.

I grin. "You're a lucky guy, Caleb."

With that I head down to the Watchers.

As I walk in, Arnold looks up, and appears to be studying me.

"Jeanine told me your parents didn't come." This is the last thing I want to talk about, so I just stare at my shoes. "She told me to keep you busy."

I nod and sit down.

"But if you want to talk, we can." I am surprised at the overture. "I was a transfer, did you know? From Candor."

"Jeanine says that Visiting Day should be stopped, that it just upsets us anyways." I tell him.

Arnold smiles. "That sounds like something Jeanine would say."

"Did it upset you?" I probe.

"Of course, but it helped me, too. It helped me realize how far away from my family I already was. The pain was necessary. It's a concept I don't think Jeanine's ever understood. Personal growth always requires pain, in my experience."

"You've been happy here, then?" I ask.

"Most of the time. How about you?" He's from Candor, so he'll know if I lie.

"I don't really know." It comes out almost as a whisper. He seems taken aback.

"Alright, well, let's see if I can find you something interesting to watch." He flips through several screens and stops when he finds the initiates. They're gathered around a table in the Dauntless cafeteria, and appear to be talking excitedly.

"OK Beatrice, what do you see?" Arnold turns to me, expectantly.

"They're making plans."

"Very good. How do you know that?"

I search the screen for tangible clues to back up my intuition. "Well, it looks like the girl there..." I struggle to remember her name. "Christina? It looks like she's drawing a map with her finger. There seems to be a hierarchy, even among the initiates. Are they planning a mission?"

Arnold nods. "Tell me about the hierarchy? Who is in charge?"

"Well, it seems like it's Christina, but I see she pauses occasionally to look at Will, maybe for approval? Wait, no. She's touching his arm. She _likes_ him."

"Who is she afraid of?" Arnold asks.

I scrutinize the screen, looking for submissive body language. "That one – Peter?"

"Correct," Arnold nods.

"But he's letting her do the talking?"

"He knows she's smarter."

"Do you know what are they planning?" I ask.

"All the initiates participate in a kind of 'capture the flag' exercise. With guns, of course." Arnold chuckles. "It's Dauntless after all. They'll go down by the Navy pier tonight. They split into two teams. Eric takes one, Four takes the other. Should be interesting. It's too bad we don't have any cameras down there."

 _No cameras._ I can feel the seed of a dangerous idea taking root in my mind. Now I know where I'm going tonight.

"How do they get down there?" I ask.

"They jump on the trains, it's the same one that goes by here, actually." This must be fate, I think to myself. It would be wrong _not_ to go. I'm reminded of something my mother used to say. _It's always easy to convince ourselves we need something that we've already decided we want._

The hours tick by as I watch the initiates make their plans and ready themselves for tonight. I make my own plans. Finally, it's time for dinner. I don't dare miss another meal and it's not dark out yet, anyways.

At dinner, it is clear Caleb has already pitched his double date idea to Linus. He keeps trying to engage me in conversation, and I do my best to appear interested. It's torture. As soon as that thought forms in my mind, though, I instantly push it away. I can almost hear my mother speaking, _don't be unkind, Beatrice._ I stand up to leave and make a point of smiling at him as sincerely as I can. It seems to work.

I pick up my pace as soon as round the corner on the way back to the dorms. I need to be under the covers before Amy gets back, because I can't let her see what I'll be wearing. I shut the door and quickly dress in my gym clothing, a long-sleeved, navy blue cotton shirt and leggings. I'm tying the laces on my sneakers when I hear her laughter in the hallway. This time, I hear Caleb's as well.

I jump under the covers and pretend to be sleeping so she'll turn out the lights quickly. It works. She wastes no time getting into bed and soon I am listening in the dark to the steady sound of her breathing, gradually slowing into sleep. Once I'm sure she's unconscious, I slowly climb out of bed, and make my way into the hallway, closing the door as quietly as I can.

I've thought this through. The only way to play it is to walk confidently with my head up, and to look surprised if anyone stops me. When I get to the atrium, it is empty. There is no one around. I steady my nerves and walk quickly to the door. I am terrified, but exhilarated at the same time. The feeling is delicious. I reach the door and push, and it opens. I close my eyes and feel the cool night air on my face. I can hear the rumble of the train in the distance, as if it were arriving just for me. This next part will be tricky, but I've watched it hundreds of time. As the train approaches, I accelerate into a sprint. At the right moment, I leap up and grab the handhold next to the door. I smack the door entry pad and the door slides open, and I hoist myself onto the floor.

The minute I am safe, I laugh out loud. I am alone on the train. I look out the window, watching for the Ferris wheel that marks the Navy pier. The moment arrives faster than I thought it would. Now I have to get off the train. I open the door, and watch the ground speed by. I close my eyes. _Don't think, just jump._

Crash. I am rolling now, but I quickly stop myself. Gingerly, I stand up. Nothing broken, apparently. I grin to myself in the darkness. I am free. I think there is still time before they get here, so I look around for a good vantage point. I need to be hidden, but I want to see everything. Suddenly, it comes to me. If I climb the Ferris wheel, I'll be able to see everything. I hoist myself up onto the lowest strut and steadily climb. The bars are rusty, but I don't weigh much and they seem to be holding. Hand over hand, I don't even realize how high I am, until I look down. The view is amazing, exhilarating.

Only a few minutes later, I hear them start to arrive. There is a group standing right next to the Ferris wheel, so close I can hear them talking. They are arguing about whether to take an offensive or defensive posture. I hear a girl's voice arguing, and I realize it must be Christina. She sounds exactly the way I had imagined her. I lean farther over the side to get a better view. At that moment, the bar I'm standing on groans and starts to give way. A brief sound escapes my mouth but I clamp it shut, and move over to the next strut. That turns out to be a lucky move, because the one I was on falls to the ground moments later. I hear it strike the pavement. They stop talking. I can't see them now. I can hear them walking away, but then a deeper voice calls to them, "You go ahead, I'll be there in a minute."

I peer down through the struts and see a lone dark figure looking back at me. I press myself into a shadow, but it's not enough. I can hear him climbing. I think it's Four.

"Who's up there? Is that you Eric?" He calls out. He climbs a lot faster than I did, and I know he will be able to see me soon. I glance around. There is nowhere to go, and my legs are too short to reach the next strut now that the one I was on has collapsed. I'm stuck. I try to steady my nerves. I'll just say I'm lost, I tell myself. What's he going to do, shoot me? _It's a distinct possibility._

I hazard another look over the edge and come face to face with him. It is Four. He is fewer than six inches away and I am struck speechless. So is he. In fact, he looks more terrified than me, though I can't imagine why. He's armed and he can climb down.

He is out of breath and the words are half-whispered. "Why are you up here?"

I cannot lie to him. My mouth has gone dry, but I find the words.

"I climbed up here to watch you all play capture the flag."

An emotion flashes across his face that I can't identify. I try to pull my gaze away from him, but I can't.

"You climbed up here for _fun_?"

"You could say that."

"Are you human?" I don't know how to answer that.

"My legs aren't long enough to reach the next strut, I'm stuck."

He stretches out his arm to me. "C'mon, grab my arm, I'll pull you over." I have no choice but to trust him, but I think I would, anyways. I take his arm, and he slowly pulls me toward him. I'm almost over the gap when my foot slips. He breaks my fall by pulling me quickly into him. I am a hundred feet off the ground and I just almost died, but the only thought in my head right now is of Four. My face is against his chest. I can hear his breath, ragged and fast. I can feel every place on my body that is touching him. I have to take control of this.

"Thanks, I owe you." My voice barely shakes as I say the words.

He speaks as if through clenched teeth. "You have no idea."

"We need to climb down now." I say.

"I'm going to slowly turn you around so you can put your hands on the bar. Are you ready?"

I nod my head yes. His hand slides down and attaches around my waist, and he slowly pivots me around. We both know that one wrong move will send us plummeting, but I am with him, and I am not afraid. I reach for the bar and make contact.

"You okay?" he asks.

"I'm good. You can let go."

He slowly bring his hand from my waist back up to the bar. _Why is his hand shaking?_

"Okay," he tells me. "We're going to climb down now. I'll take a step, then you take a step."

It takes a lot longer to get down than it did to go up. We move in tandem, without talking. As strange as it is to be with him after watching him for so long, I feel as if I know him. I find myself leaning back into him as we make our way down, as if to reassure myself of his presence. And when I do, he leans forward in response. Am I imagining it? What am I doing?

"Last rung." he mutters. I hear his feet drop onto solid ground, and mine follow a moment later. As I turn around to face him, his foot whips forward and sweeps my legs out from under me. The wind is knocked out of me and I gasp for air. He straddles me and I feel something pressed against my throat. It's a knife. _What is happening?_

I find his eyes, and they are black and fathomless. When he speaks, his voice is deliberate and controlled.

"Now you're going to tell me who you are, and what you're _really_ doing here."

 **A/N** **Ah, perhaps not the kind of meeting you were hoping for, eh?** **Don't worry, it gets better. Oddly enough, the moment where he has his knife to her throat was the first kernel I ever had about this story. Weird, I know. But it just popped into my head and it seemed like an interesting challenge to figure out how they both ended up in that position, and then also how they get out of it, how they both get to a place where they can trust each other afterwards.** **The next chapter will be from Four's perspective.** **They both have a lot of explaining to do, no?**

 **Just one more thing. I *abhor* violence against women, and there's absolutely, categorically, *never* anything sexy about it. _I'm looking at you, fifty shades, game of thrones, and anybody else who has profited from such displays._ I promise this is the first and last time Four will be even vaguely aggressive toward Beatrice. He knows he's in a precarious position for a variety of reasons and he's just caught someone from Erudite spying on him. He has to find out what's going on and this is the only way he thinks he'll get the truth out of her. This will all be explained from his point of view in the next chapter, but I thought I should head off any objections as early as possible, because it may be a week or more before the next chapter comes out. **

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	14. Chapter 14 An Interrogation

_From Four's perspective._

I have a problem with kindness. It's not surprising given the childhood I had. Still, this may be a new low, even for me. I didn't really get a good look at her before, but now that I'm on top of her, with my knife to her throat, I can see she can't be more than sixteen. _What am I doing?_ It doesn't matter, I tell myself. The way things are going lately, I know my survival might depend on figuring out what she's up to. I can't figure out much else about her except her blue clothing tells me she is Erudite. Why would they send an initiate to spy on me?

I try to make my voice sound as threatening as possible. It isn't difficult. "Name."

She glares back at me. I push the dull edge of my blade a few millimeters closer.

"I'm not telling you anything until you put that knife away."

She's brave. I'd be impressed if I weren't so scared of her.

"I could kill you right now. Tell me who you are."

"If you kill me, you'll never know." An Erudite answer. I have no reply, and I'm quickly losing both my patience and my will. I pull the knife back, but I keep it out, in view.

"I'm going to ask you one more time. Name."

"Natalie Prior." I pull back as if stung. _I haven't heard that name in a long time._ _She was my mother's closest friend._ _How could she know that, and why would she give that name?_ I search her face, but all I see is defiance.

"I don't _think_ so." I spit the words out and motion as if I'm about to put the knife back.

"Okay, Okay, it's _Beatrice_ Prior." Now the pieces fall in place. I had thought she looked vaguely familiar. I can see the outline of the woman I had known in this girl's face. She is beautiful, but not in a conventional way.

"You were Abnegation?" I ask.

"How do you know that?" she counters.

"I'm asking the questions here." Her eyes flash with anger, and she moves to sit up. I let her.

"You really know how to sweep a girl off her feet, _Four._ " I freeze. She is triumphant, knowing she's unnerved me.

"How do you know my name?"

"Put the knife away and I'll tell you."

"No."

"You're armed and could easily outrun me."

"Fine." I holster my knife. We're both sitting on the ground now, our arms around our knees, mirroring each other. It's a clear night and it occurs to me, bizarrely, that this is the first time I've been out at night alone with a girl. It's a ridiculous thought and I brush it away quickly.

"So, Beatrice Prior, why did you defect from Abnegation?"

"I didn't belong there." I can hear the regret in her voice. She's smart, but I get the sense there's a lot more to her.

"You belong in Erudite?" I ask.

"No." This time it's almost a whisper.

"You're an initiate?" She nods.

"Why did you choose them?"

"I had other plans, but when my brother chose Erudite, I realized I couldn't bear to leave him, too."

I search her face, and I see the truth in it. Perhaps she is not a spy?

"What plans?"

"Dauntless. But I'm too skinny and small. I wouldn't have lasted a day."

"I was skinny, too. And terrified." I've never talked like this to anyone before. I can see her eyes moving over me, but it doesn't bother me.

"I can't imagine that."

I allow myself a small smile. "You've managed to disarm me."

She grins. "I suppose so."

"I have a feeling you'd have been just fine."

She shrugs. "I'll never know." I can tell the thought makes her sad, and I have the urge to comfort her. I have no idea how to, though, and I pull myself out of that thought. _She is still the enemy,_ I remind myself.

"There is still the matter of what you were doing here."

"I told you, I wanted to watch the game."

"So you snuck out at night, and climbed to the top of the Ferris wheel?" _Unbelievable._

"I was curious."

"About..?"

Her voice is serious now. "Something is coming. Something bad. They say Dauntless is going to overthrow Abnegation." The words tumble out of her as if they have long been pent in.

My voice is harsher than I intend. "And you think that would be a bad thing?"

"Yes, I do. Is it true?"

Something tells me I can trust her, but I hold back. Instead, I probe. "Who do you think would benefit the most if it happened?" I can tell she's already figured that one out.

"Erudite."

I nod. "I think they're actively working to make it happen."

She looks surprised. "Jeanine says she's trying to prevent it."

"Jeanine is a liar." I hadn't meant to be that forthcoming, but I can tell she knows I might be right.

Before she has a chance to respond though, I hear the sounds of my initiates approaching. I've left them completely on their own. Unforgivable. It seems they did not need me, though. Christina is marching, no, skipping, and waving the other team's flag as high in the air as she can reach. Eric is with them, looking none too pleased. They must have decided to capture him as well. They'll pay for this.

I can't let them find me with Beatrice. I leap to my feet and pull her with me, into the small compartment at the base of the Ferris wheel that would have housed the operator. I push her down into a crouch. She opens her mouth to question me, but I put my finger up to it, to quiet her. She complies. The Dauntless are perfectly comfortable touching others, but I was not born Dauntless, and even handshakes are still awkward for me. It's strange to me how easy it is to touch her, though. Our hiding place is cramped, but I am with her and I am not afraid.

"If Eric finds you, he will kill you." Her eyes widen at the sound of his name, but she remains silent. I hear Will shout to Christina, "Maybe he's planning to meet us at the zipline?"

Eric snorts. "No way is he at the zipline. He must have gone back to Dauntless. He probably though you were a lost cause."

"Well he was wrong about that, huh?" Christina laughs. She's always too bold for her own good.

"Uncuff me now, and maybe I'll let you live."

"Nah, I think we'll take you back to Dauntless just like this." _Not smart, Christina._

I can't hear what Eric says next, but it's enough to make her reconsider.

"Alright, fine." She pouts.

She must have uncuffed him because next I hear her yelp in pain. Knowing Eric, he probably punched her the first chance he got. Gradually I hear them move off, but I don't dare show myself, despite the claustrophobia that is beginning to seep into my consciousness.

I turn back to Beatrice, and she is calm. Studying me. Her closeness distracts me from my growing panic. She breaks the silence.

"Why do they call you Four?" she whispers.

"We go through simulations tailored to each of our deepest fears during our initiation. Turns out, I only have four fears."

"Four fears? I thought the Dauntless weren't afraid of anything."

I laugh, almost out loud. I don't know why I'm telling her these things.

"Would you believe that two of them are heights and small, enclosed spaces?"

It's her turn to laugh now, but she stifles it with both hands.

"Sorry. Isn't it strange that five minutes ago you had a knife to my throat, and now you're telling me all your secrets?"

 _Not all of them._ A sliver of moonlight silhouettes her face.

"I have no idea why." I swallow nervously, waiting for her reaction.

She takes a deep breath, as if she's just made a decision. "I'm going to tell you a secret." She reaches out and puts her hand on top of mine. I know she is Abnegation and I understand the significance of the gesture. The Abnegation don't touch people casually.

"They are watching you. All of Dauntless, and you. You in particular. That's how I knew your name."

I try to process this news. I've suspected it for some time, but hearing it confirmed is still terrifying.

"How?"

"Cameras. Everywhere. Even in your control room."

"Why me?" I think I know the answer, but I don't dare say it out loud, even to her.

"Arnold says you could be reasoned with, if an attack happens."

"Who is Arnold?"

"He's in charge of the Watchers. The ones for Dauntless, anyways. I'm his trainee."

"Watchers. That's an interesting word for …"

"Spies?" She finishes my sentence for me. "I get the sense there is something else, though."

"What?" I ask.

"They won't say." I can tell she is waiting for me to fill it in. Despite our strange connection, though, there are some things I'm not ready to tell her. I've been planning on leaving Dauntless and joining the factionless. I realize now that day may need to come sooner, rather than later. My mind spins.

"I should get back to Erudite, I was never supposed to be gone this long." I can tell she dreads going.

"I'll take you back." _What?_ _It's far too dangerous._

"I'll be fine."

I leave her no room to argue. I stand and hold out my hand to pull her up. She doesn't need it, though. "Let's go." _Why am I doing this?_ I realize that I want her closeness. It's a long forgotten feeling, packed away for years.

We make our way to the tracks and soon I hear the train coming. "C'mon, we need to run." I get up first and offer my hand, she takes it this time and I pull her into the car. She is light in my arms. The car is lit and she is sitting across from me now. For some reason, it's harder to talk in the light, and we both ride in silence. I search for something to say. I know I can't let this be the last time we talk. An idea comes to me.

"I could teach you to fight."

"Really?"

"Of course."

"I don't know if I could get out again. How would I meet you?"

"I'll be on this train every night at 10 for the next week."

"If I can be there, I will."

I am exhilarated, but I can't think of anything more to say. We approach Erudite, and it's time to get off. She stands and so do I. I open the door and we both take a deep breath. I turn to her and she is grinning. She speaks the words to me, even as I am saying them to her.

 _Don't think, just jump._

 **A/N** **Much better, no?** **I was able to get to this much sooner than I planned. These are the chapters I've really been wanting to write since I started.** **Thank you so much for reading and please let me know what you think.** **I am open to suggestions.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	15. Chapter 15 Catch and Release

Silently, Four follows me almost to the door. I push on it, and it yields. I pause and look back at him one last time. I find myself wishing he would stay, but I don't say anything. He nods to me, and turns back toward the train. Once I'm inside, I find the atrium is deserted, and I walk through it toward the dorms as quickly as I can. I don't even know what time it is.

"You've had quite an evening."

I pivot, and find Jeanine standing behind me. _How long has she been waiting for me?_ I know it's all over if I'm caught in a lie. "I just wanted to get out for a bit. The door was open."

"You're not a prisoner here," she snaps. She glances around the atrium and takes a deep breath. "Let's finish this discussion in my office, shall we?" It's not a request. I follow her. Neither of us speak in the elevator.

Once in her office, we take out usual seats. She wastes no time on pleasantries.

"Where were you?"

"Arnold told me the Dauntless were playing capture the flag at the Navy pier, and I wanted to watch."

Her eyes widen. "You were at the Navy pier?" I nod my head yes. "How did you get there?"

"I jumped a train."

"What on earth possessed you to do that?"

"I was curious. Arnold said it would be interesting, and there are no cameras down there."

"I'm sure he wasn't suggesting you go in person."

"No," I concede.

"Beatrice, this is serious. What if you'd been hurt? What if you'd been caught?"

It occurs to me that there may, in fact, be cameras there. Ones Arnold doesn't know about. I decide I'd better come at least partially clean.

"I _was_ caught."

"What?" Jeanine can barely contain her horror.

"By whom?"

"Four." I can read the alarm on her face. She steadies herself.

"Tell me exactly what happened."

"Nothing, really. I climbed the Ferris wheel to get a better view…"

"You climbed the Ferris wheel? Beatrice, have you lost your mind?"

"…but then I got stuck. He climbed up and helped me."

She stands and begins to pace agitatedly around the room, I can tell she's trying to figure out every possible implication of this news.

"Did anyone else see you?"

"No."

This appears to calm her down, and she sinks back into the chair across from me.

"How did you get away?"

"He let me go. He rode the train back with me."

She leans forward now, I can tell she is intrigued.

"What was he like?"

"I don't know – quiet, I guess."

She eyes me speculatively, tapping one manicured finger on an arm rest.

"This could be very useful, you know."

"Useful?"

"Yes. Beatrice, I want you to befriend him. Do you have a way of contacting him?"

"He said he rides the train at night."

"Good. You'll meet him there tomorrow night."

"I don't understand." As a matter of fact, I understand all too well, but I want her to say it out loud.

"You're a pretty girl, Beatrice." She reaches across and strokes my hair. I am repulsed, but I hide it. "I bet nobody ever told you that in Abnegation, did they?" I shake my head.

"Arnold has probably told you that Four is someone we're very interested in." I nod. She pauses for a moment, as if trying to decide something. It's over quickly, though and she walks over to a monitor embedded in the wall. "I'm going to show you something even Arnold's never seen." She gives me a conspiratorial wink. "This is an important task I'm entrusting you with. You deserve to know why." _Where is this headed?_

"Did Four tell you anything about himself?"

"No, not really."

"And you'd never meet him before?"

"No, how would I…?"

"Take a look at this. We've recently managed to gain access to the Dauntless mainframe. We're still sifting through what we've found there, but this turned up rather early on. Has Arnold explained to you about the fear simulations?"

"Yes."

"Well, the computer stores the contents of those hallucinations, and we found Four's." She turns back to the screen and starts the display. Four is suddenly standing outside, trying to balancing himself on a thin bar suspended between two buildings, hundreds of feet into the air. His eyes are wild with fear and he crouches down to clutch the bar with both hands. I want to look away. It's a terrible invasion, and I don't want to see him like this.

"The beginning is rather uninteresting. I'm certainly glad they kept watching, though." A sly smile curves one side of her mouth upwards. "Let's skip to the good part?"

Four is dressed in gray and I recognize the spare architecture and minimal furnishing around him. _Four was Abnegation?_ It explains why he knew I wasn't Natalie Prior. But if he's only eighteen, how did I not know him? A man is walking toward him. It is Marcus. He is winding a thick, black, leather belt around his hand. Four sees him and starts to back away, but once his heels hit the wall, he sinks down and starts to cower. Marcus starts to whip him with the belt, over and over, clearly taking pleasure in beating him. Four makes himself as small as possible, covering his face with his hands. I feel dizzy, watching it, and it must show on my face.

"Yes, it's difficult to watch, isn't it?" I know it wasn't difficult at all for Jeanine to watch, I imagine her salivating like a hungry wolf at the sight of it. But I play along.

"The Abnegation pretend to be saints, but once you peel back that perfect exterior, you see what's really underneath. You can bet Four understands that. It's a shame I can't publicize this, but then Dauntless would know we have access to their mainframe. I'll have to find another way to expose Marcus." She nods toward Four. "He used to be Tobias Eaton, but I'm told he doesn't use that name anymore."

 _Tobias._ It's hard to imagine he was ever that person.

"I don't remember him from Abnegation." As the words leave my mouth, I realize that isn't true. He was the boy at the funeral, so long ago. My breath catches as I remember it, and I feel it in my gut.

"No, you wouldn't. Marcus kept him locked in the house. His medical file from Dauntless says when he got there he was severely malnourished and covered in bruises. His back was so scarred he had to cover it in tattoos. It's a miracle he made it through their initiation." She shakes her head in feigned sympathy. She is watching me to measure the effect of her words.

"He deserves a friend, doesn't he?"

I shrug.

"And you just need to tell me if he says anything to you about Abnegation." She says it so casually. As if she weren't sending me out to spy for her. "Or anything else you think might be important." _Like what?_

"Okay."

She smiles. "Good. I'll expect a full report when you get back tomorrow night. Come straight to my office."

"Yes, Jeanine."

"Get some sleep now, you look worn out. You can skip problem solving tomorrow. I'll let Athena know."

I rise and walk toward the elevator.

"Beatrice?"

"Yes?"

"We have to keep this assignment strictly between ourselves. You cannot discuss it with anyone, even Arnold, OK?"

"I understand."

I make my way back to the dorm. Still in my clothes, I carefully climb into bed so as not to wake Amy. Oddly, my mind is not as unsettled as it should be, given what has happened tonight. Now I'm Jeanine's spy. _Is it really any different than what you've been doing with the Watchers?_ _Yes, it is._ _He was Abnegation, we should be on the same side._ In my heart I've known it all along, but the events of this evening have made it clear that I made the wrong choice. Perhaps because I have finally admitted it to myself, I feel light, lighter than I have felt for a long time. Perhaps it's because I know that tomorrow night, I'll be free again. I'll be with Four.

 **A/N** **Thank you so much for reading and please let me know what you think.** **I really appreciate the reviews. New note 6/12/2015 I usually write on the weekends but this weekend I'll be away so there may be no updates until next weekend. I have some good ideas, though, and the next chapter will be called "Hit First, Hit Hard" Like many of the chapter titles, there are several ways to interpret it :)**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	16. Chapter 16 Hit First, Hit Hard

I wake briefly to Amy shaking me, but I brush her away telling her I don't feel well, and fall back into a deep sleep. Oddly, I dream of Evelyn Eaton. When I wake again it is already mid-morning. Evelyn's face is still fresh in my mind, though. She was my mother's closest friend. Now that I know who Four is, I'm surprised I didn't notice the resemblance between them the first time I saw him on the screen in the Watchers. He has her dark blue eyes and olive skin. I wonder if this is why we trusted each other; on some level I must have recognized him, just as he recognized me?

I've wondered, many times over the years, where Evelyn was. I have assumed she is still alive, but if so, where? After seeing Four's fear landscape, I can guess why she left Marcus. But why would Marcus help her by faking her death? To save face? It doesn't make sense, and how could she leave her son behind with such a man? I yawn and stretch. I realize I've missed lunch and I'm starving.

I dress quickly and make my way to the Watchers. Arnold and I watch the trainees spar, but I don't see Four anywhere. Perhaps he's in the Dauntless control room, but I can't think of a reason to justify looking there. Under Eric's tutelage, the trainees are brutal with each other, but I can't help admiring their strength. They're ranked on how they perform in these bouts; I wonder how I would have done. I think about tonight. Four will see I was never cut out for Dauntless, either, and will probably want nothing to do with me. Perhaps that's for the best, though. I wouldn't be spying for Jeanine any more, at least. I want the freedom, though. The freedom is worth it, I think, and being close to Jeanine might keep me safe.

"Have you heard a word I've said?"

"Sorry, Arnold, I was daydreaming."

"Athena told me you missed problem solving today. You're doing some important job for Jeanine?"

I can't look him in the eye. "Jeanine says I'm not supposed to talk to anyone about it."

Arnold sighs. "Listen, don't get too caught up in Jeanine's world. She's become too obsessed with hunting Divergents. I'm not sure they even exist."

"What makes them so dangerous? Is it just that they would be disloyal to their factions? It doesn't seem like the whole story."

"Well, I don't know how much of this is true, but I've heard that the Divergents were the result of genetic manipulation, and the Divergence is just a way to identify these people that may harbor genetic flaws as a result of that manipulation. Of course you know that both sides used genetic engineering to create so-called "super soldiers?"

I nod, recalling from my years of Faction History classes that one of the first things the Founders did was to outlaw such engineering. I think back also to the book the Guardian gave me. It said that Divergents had been barred from entering the City after the creation of the factions. Perhaps this is why? But if they were banished, and further genetic engineering banned, why would there be Divergents now?

"What happened to them after the War?"

"I don't know, I suppose most of them were killed. They were incredibly aggressive, by design, and also hyper-intelligent. It made them ruthless – inhuman and deadly. Have you read the Greek tragedies?

"No, why?"

"Ah, you should. Splendid stories. Everything you need to know about human behavior has already been chronicled there. Anyways, all those stories have a hero, and that hero is always blessed with gifts bestowed by the Gods. The story hinges on what our hero chooses to do with those gifts. The catch is that with each of these gifts come the _hamartia_ – the fatal flaws which ultimately lead to the heroes' downfall. It's like yin and yang, you can't have one without the other. This is the issue with the Divergents, I think – they possess the virtues of our factions to greater measures, and because of that, they also possess the flaws that accompany them, and these flaws can lead them to do terrible things."

"Like the War?"

"Exactly. Of course, in the Greek tragedies, the hero always has a choice. The soldiers of the Great War had that choice taken away from them by the people who created them, and the outcome was terrible. Jeanine thinks such a result is inevitable, but she was always far more interested in science than history, even when we were children."

"You went to school with her?"

"Yes of course. I knew your parents, as well." Arnold smiles gently. "They were good people."

"They're still good people," I counter.

Arnold suddenly looks uncomfortable. "Yes… of course they are. We should get back to work."

When I arrive at the Great Hall for dinner, Caleb and Linus are the only ones at the table. Their heads are bent together and they're talking quietly to each other. They see me approach and stop talking abruptly. We make our hellos, and Caleb wastes no time.

"So, we decided where we're going tomorrow night, the theatrical company is putting on a play by Shakespeare." Caleb gestures toward Linus with a barely perceptible tilt of his head, and a raised eyebrow.

I shrug, just enough for him to see, but no one else. I know I have to fit in, especially now. It's important that my loyalties not be questioned. I smile as naturally as possible and try to sound excited. "Sure, that sounds great." I've never been to a play before, the Abnegation frown on such things, but it sounds interesting, and at least I won't have to make conversation.

Linus had been holding his breath and it's clear he's relieved now. He sneaks a shy smile at me, and I try to reciprocate. Fortunately, Amy arrives just then with the others, and sets her tray down next to mine.

"You look better!" She exclaims. "I was worried about you."

"I guess I just needed some extra sleep." I respond.

"Too good for problem solving?" Caleb has an odd edge to his voice, it almost sounds like jealously.

"No, just tired." I need to change the subject.

"Amy, how is your work going?" I ask.

"Good. I'm super excited about Saturday night, I've never seen a play before." She beams at Caleb. Apparently they had already discussed the plans among themselves.

"Neither have we," answers Caleb.

Amy turns her attention to Caleb, "How are things in your lab?" I sense concern in her voice, and I wonder how much he's told her.

"It's OK." He shrugs.

We all dig into our food and I'm the first one done. As I rise to leave, I notice Linus' eyes follow me. I wish he'd turn his attentions toward Emma or Laura or someone else, but it doesn't look like that's going to happen any time soon.

It's a moonless night and cold enough for me to see my breath. I shift back and forth on my feet, dreading and wishing for the arrival of the train in equal parts. When it does come, I see Four leaning out the door of one of the cars. I break into a sprint alongside it and grab his outstretched hand. He pulls me into the train. Like the night before, we are sitting across from each other, with nothing to say. He breaks the silence.

"How did you get back in without getting caught last night?"

I glance around nervously, but the train is empty except for us. Still I whisper. "I _was_ caught."

His eyes widen. "What happened?"

"Jeanine was waiting for me when I got back."

His voice has changed, and once again, he is the Four who knocked me to the ground at the bottom of the Ferris wheel. "You told her where you'd been?"

"Yes."

"And?"

"She told me to meet you again tonight."

"The cameras aren't enough? She's sending initiates out to spy in person now?"

"I didn't plan any of this."

"You're playing a very dangerous game, Beatrice."

"I know." I look over at the door, wondering if I should just jump now, but can see that we're heading into the factionless zone.

He leans forward now and looks me in the eye. "It's okay. I'm not going to hurt you."

"Why _are_ you here?" I ask.

"Maybe I'm spying, too." He counters.

"I'm not going to tell her anything.'

He watches me silently for a moment. "I believe you."

"Where are we going?"

"You'll see."

After we jump from the train, Four pulls a black cloth from his pocket. "I'm going to blindfold you now. It's safer for us both if you don't know where we're going." It's clear this isn't a request, so I turn my back to him and allow him to tie it. He takes my hand in his. It is calloused and sure. As he leads me, I try to remember the turns, but I suspect he is taking me in circles to confuse me. I hear a door creak open. Finally, he stops and I uncover my eyes. We're in a large open space. The windows have all been covered over with dark paper.

"What is this place?"

"An abandoned warehouse. The way things are going, I may need a safe place soon."

"Isn't Dauntless safe?"

He eyes me carefully. "Maybe. Are you safe in Erudite?"

"I don't know." It comes out almost as a whisper.

"Listen, I said I'd teach you to fight. In exchange, I have some questions."

"I don't know…"

"Beatrice, something is coming, you said so yourself. You're going to have to figure out where your loyalties lie."

I'm angry now. "I'm just trying to stay alive. Trying to keep my family alive. Where do _your_ loyalties lie? Is Dauntless going to attack Abnegation?"

Four sighs. "If it does happen, the order will come from Erudite - from Jeanine"

"I don't understand - she doesn't have the authority."

"That's why I need your help. She has someone on the inside – in Dauntless. Find out who."

"Why does she want them to attack Abenegation?"

"She thinks they're harboring Divergents."

"Are they?"

"Yes, a few, but they're not the source."

"The source?"

He's visibly uncomfortable. "Like I said, there are some things it's safer for you not to know. C'mon, let's get to work." He motions me into the center of the room. He stands with his right foot in front, with his fists up, sheltering his face.

'Hit me."

"What?"

"Lesson number one: hit first, ask questions later."

"Yeah, I remember." It comes out harsher than I intended.

His voice becomes quiet. "I'm not proud of that. I didn't know who you were." He readopts his instructor's voice. "Now, hit me."

I've never hit anyone in my life. It's not the Abnegation way. "I don't want to hurt you."

He laughs, not unkindly. "I think I can take…"

I don't let him finish. I lunge forward and punch him in the stomach. I don't quite have the nerve to use all my strength though. He steps back, surprised, but the punch seems barely to have registered.

"Good, you're listening. The next part of this lesson: hit _hard_."

"I'm not very strong."

"No, you're not, but you're smart, and you're brave." He says these things matter-of-factly, but I'm unaccustomed to complements. "Use your elbows and knees, you'll have more power that way, but you'll have to get in closer." He demonstrates by kicking upward with his knee and them coming down hard with the opposite elbow. "See?"

He returns to his fighter's stance and I try to mimic it. We circle each other for several seconds before I try to knee him. This time he blocks me easily and pushes me gently away. "Try again."

After a few more failed attempts, he stops me. "You're telegraphing. You shift your eyes to the spot you're going to kick every time. Keep your eyes on mine."

I comply, noting abstractly that I don't mind having an excuse to watch him. I try again, and this time I do make contact, but wind up off-balance and can't follow through with my elbow.

"Good, but don't shift your weight too far forward."

We continue on like this for what seems like hours, but probably isn't. I'm exhausted, and it shows. My hair has come half undone from its ponytail and is stuck to the sides of my face and neck with sweat.

"Sit down, take a break." I kneel down on the floor and start to wipe my face with my sleeves. Four tosses me a small towel which I accept gratefully. When I'm done, he hands me a canteen and I gulp down half of its contents in one swallow.

"Take it easy," he advises as I hand the canteen back. He drinks the remainder and sits on the floor facing me.

His next words startle me. "What were your test results?"

"Ab-Abnegation." I reply, but I can hear my own fear.

"Are you sure about that?"

I wonder again if he, too, is Divergent, but I am too afraid to ask, or to reveal myself. "Yes, I'm sure."

"I wouldn't have guessed that." He laughs quietly. "I don't see too many girls from Abnegation climbing Ferris wheels and jumping onto trains."

"What were your test results?"

"The same as yours." He is watching me closely, measuring my reaction. _He knows._ "Didn't you recognize me, Beatrice?"

I'm relieved at the opportunity to give up the pretense that I don't know who he is. "Not at first, but Jeanine told me who you were."

"What else did she tell you?"

"Not much." I try to say it as casually as possible. I don't feel right lying to him, but I can't begin to find the words to tell him what I saw in his fear landscape.

"Why is Jeanine so afraid of Divergents?" I shift the topic.

"Their numbers are growing. She's afraid they'll start another War."

"Will they?"

"Maybe."

"Why?"

Four shrugs. "Your mother was my mother's closest friend." _Where is he going with this?_ "But they had a falling out. Do you know what it was about?"

I shake my head. "No, and she's never mentioned her since."

"She kept the silence."

In Abnegation, it's considered wrong to speak of someone who has died. "Yes."

"At Dauntless funerals, they shout their goodbyes to the sky and drink all night."

I try to imagine what that would be like. "At least nothing goes unsaid. I couldn't have survived in Abnegation, I couldn't have lived with all that silence – all those secrets."

"My mother couldn't take it. I heard her and your mother screaming at each other the day before she…" He pauses, as if unable to say the word. "I'd never heard her raise her voice before."

Something tells me now is not the time to tell him his mother might still be alive, so I stay silent. After a few moments, he climbs to his feet.

"C'mon, it's late, I'll take you back."

 **A/N Thank you so much for reading and please let me know what you think. I really appreciate the reviews.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	17. Chapter 17 The Letter

It's almost one in the morning when I enter Jeanine's office. She is at her desk, peering at a computer screen. I wonder if she ever sleeps at all.

"Beatrice, I was beginning to worry about you."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize, you're doing important work for us."

I flinch it this, and hope she doesn't notice. She motions me to a chair and we both sit.

"So where did he take you?"

"I think it was in the factionless sector."

"You're not sure?"

"He blindfolded me."

Jeanine looks alarmed. "Weren't you afraid?"

"No."

She seems confused by my answer. "I would have been terrified. You must trust him a great deal."

I grapple for an explanation. "Maybe it's because we're from the same faction." The minute the words are out of my mouth I realize my mistake.

"You're Erudite now, Beatrice." Her voice is calm but with an edge that I've come to recognize. "And whomever he may have been, he is Dauntless now. Don't ever forget that. They're killers."

I have no illusions about why I'm in her office right now. It's to give her information, and I realize I'd better give her some before she becomes even more suspicious of me. "He took me to a warehouse."

"What kind of warehouse?"

"I don't know, it was empty, and the windows were covered with dark paper."

"Then what happened?"

"He offered to teach me how to fight."

Jeanine's brow wrinkles in confusion. "You mean… _physically_?"

"Yes."

"Why would that appeal to you?"

I know I can't tell her that I regret not choosing Dauntless. "I thought it would put him at ease – get him talking."

She likes this answer. "And did he talk?"

I have to give her something that isn't a complete lie. My mind lights on the most innocuous part of the conversation. "He knows who I am. He told me our mothers had been close friends, and that they argued the day before she died."

"Ah yes, Evelyn's death was a tragedy. No woman should die in childbirth. It never would have happened if she'd stayed in Erudite. Marcus should have taken better care of her." _Evelyn was Erudite?_ _Evelyn was pregnant?_ I wonder if Four knew this. _What happened to the baby?_

"He asked me if I knew what the argument was about, but I didn't, and my mother never spoke of it.

"Of course. The silence. Another ridiculous Abnegation custom. Did he say anything else?"

"No, not really."

"Well you seemed to have gained his trust. You like him." It's not really a question.

 _Yes._ "I guess so."

Jeanine smiles faintly. "You should give him some encouragement, then." I pretend to not fully understand what she means. Abnegation marriages are often arranged, and the couple typically has minimal or no contact with each other before hand – marriages are meant to be for the good of the community. Even afterwards, physical contact is kept to a minimum, and expressions of affection are frowned upon. I've seen enough of what happens among the young members of Dauntless, though, to understand what she is implying. I shift uneasily in my chair.

"You should get some sleep. I'll tell Athena not to expect you tomorrow. Did you make plans to meet again?"

"Yes, tomorrow night."

"Excellent."

This time I leave a note telling Amy not to wake me, and that I was up late working with Jeanine. I sleep dreamlessly and wake midmorning. Released from problem solving, I have a free hour before lunch. I decide to visit the Guardian again.

I dress quickly and go to the elevator, and manage not to run into anyone who know me. When I reach the door to the library, and push it slowly and enter.

"I was wondering when you would come back." It's as if he's been waiting for me.

"Jeanine found the book you gave me."

"Yes, she was here yesterday." A faint smile crosses his face. "She warned me not to give you any more books."

"I'm sorry."

"It is no matter. Jeanine has no authority over me."

"The book was written by someone named Prior?"

"Yes, an ancestor of yours, no doubt."

"How did you…"

"Jeanine told me. The Priors have a long and proud history in Erudite. It's good you've come back to us."

"Can I ask you about something I read in that book? It's about the Divergents."

"I see you share Jeanine's obsession."

"No, it's not that, it's just, if they were barred from the City, and if genetic engineering is banned, then how is it even possible for there to be Divergents here now? Where do they come from?

"That's an interesting question. Over the years, there has been talk of a secret cabal, in existence since the founding of the City. Robert Prior, the author of that book, was believed to be the founder of this group."

"Do you think it's possible?"

"I don't know, but I have something for you. It's something your father gave me before he left for Abnegation. He told me to give it to his children if they should find themselves in Erudite. I didn't think I'd live to see you, but here you are. I'm afraid I must ask you to read it now, and to allow me to destroy it. I suspect its contents could be dangerous for both us."

"I understand." Quickly I open the envelope and pull out the letter inside. The writing is unmistakable, though it is a rounder, more carefree version of my father's hand.

 _Dear Child,_

 _It is so strange to be writing these words, and I have no idea whether you will ever exist, or if this letter will ever reach your hands._ _Today I took my aptitude test, and got the news I have_ _been dreading for as long as I can remember._ _In a way, I've always known._ _Natalie and I have decided to join Abnegation._ _It will be a hard life, but it's the only place we'll be safe._ _If you're reading this, it will be because you have decided not to stay in Abnegation._ _Natalie has left a similar letter with someone trustworthy in Dauntless._ _There are some things you need to know, things that are dangerous to know, and which we would not have told you had you stayed in Abnegation. Since you have chosen Erudite, however, you will be in danger, and this knowledge will be vital to your safety._

 _In what can only be described as a cruel twist of fate, Natalie and I – I suppose I should say, your mother and I, have both discovered that we are Divergent._ _I have been told that my Divergence is the result of generations of selective marriage orchestrated by my family and other members of a hidden society._ _I do not even know their name, but their shadowy existence extends into all levels of the five factions._ _We do not know the source of Natalie's divergence, it may be a random mutation._ _We had both planned to join Erudite so that we could be together, but since now there is such a high likelihood that any children we might have will also be Divergent, we are seeking refuge in Abnegation._ _Were we to stay in Erudite, you would be in danger of being discovered and subject to the commands of the society, on whom you would be dependent for your safety._ _I have experienced this myself, and do not wish it for my children._ _If you are here now, though, you must seek out my brother Samuel, he will know how to keep you safe._ _I must go now._ _I do not know what the future holds, but know that I love you and your mother more than anything, even my life._ _My only regret is that after tomorrow, though we will be together, I will never again be able to tell her - or you._

 _Your Father, Andrew Prior_

My hands are shaking, but I read the letter through twice more to commit it to memory.

"My father writes that I should try to find his older brother, Samuel."

"I'm afraid that will be rather difficult, my dear."

"Why?"

"He died only a few years after your father left. In this very library."

"How?"

"They say he committed suicide by jumping over one of the rails. They found him one morning, at the bottom, fifteen floors down."

"And was it a suicide?"

"Samuel had a rare progressive neurodegenerative disease. Getting out of his wheelchair and over that rail would have been a near-impossible feat."

 **A/N To the Guest Reviewer who wondered if perhaps Four could get ahold of Natalie's letter. Hmm... If only we could guess who she might have left it with... It's too bad Andrew didn't say.** **Thank you so much for reading and please let me know what you think.** **I really appreciate the reviews.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	18. Chapter 18 Don't Get Hit

Lunch and the afternoon passed in a blur as I tried to make sense of the letter and its contents. Now I'm back in the warehouse with Four and it's the first time all day that my mind hasn't been racing.

"OK, lesson number one was hit first, hit hard. Lesson number two is even simpler: Don't get hit."

I recall the bruises covering the Dauntless initiates and wonder how well they learned this lesson. Then again, it was Eric teaching them, not Four.

"Now, your size is actually an advantage, because it makes you a smaller target. So your best bet is to get out of the way, or to deflect a blow off into another direction. Try to hit me."

I comply, and he steps to the side and deftly uses his forearm to redirect my punch.

"Okay, now you try."

I instinctively step back, apprehensive about being struck. It must show on my face.

"I won't hurt you."

"Even if I can't block it?"

He smiles briefly. "I have good aim."

The image of him throwing that knife at Al's head comes to mind. I'm not sure if I should find it reassuring or not. I take a deep breath.

"Okay".

He strikes, and I bring my arms up to cover my face. His fist stops only millimeters from me.

"Remember you want to deflect. If you try to absorb the punch, you'll get knocked off balance. And don't ever cover your eyes."

I nod, and he tries again. This time I manage to step to the side but his hand grazes me.

"We need to fix your stance." He stands beside me and turns my hips so that my right leg is forward. Like when we were on the Ferris Wheel, I am acutely aware of his touch. It must be an Abnegation thing. "You need to keep your balance – you do that by maintaining tension in your core." He takes my hand and places it on my abdomen. "Feel it?" All I feel is my heartbeat. I nod, not knowing what to say. He resumes his position and we continue on, and eventually I start to get the hang of it. Several times he comes close to hitting me but always stops just short. I find it oddly comforting.

"You're good at this."

I grin. "Would I have made it in Dauntless?"

"Yes. Definitely. But I have a feeling you'd butt heads with Eric. You're a little _too_ fearless."

"I thought fearlessness was a virtue where you come from." I'm baiting him now.

"Bravery, not fearlessness. They're not the same thing. It isn't about not being afraid, it's about not letting your fears make your decisions for you."

It's a rare moment of distraction for the usually imperturbable Four, and I seize the opportunity to block him and then quickly step in, bringing my fist up almost to his chin.

I laugh. "You let me get too close."

A shadow passes over his face, and I wonder if I've angered him. It disappears so quickly though that I am left wondering if I imagined it.

"it isn't a good idea for you to get in the habit of holding back. Next time follow through."

We continue on, and at one point I actually manage to land a solid punch to his stomach. I instantly apologize but then realize that it barely registered. Even so, he motions for me to stop, and we both sit down on the floor.

"Did you talk to Jeanine last night?"

"Yes, but I didn't get anything out of her. I was worried about asking too many questions and making her suspicious."

"Did you tell her anything about me?"

"Only the thing you said about our mothers being friends and having a falling out. I wanted to tell her something that was true. She said your mom died in childbirth. I'm sorry, Four."

I can see the muscles in his jaw working as he grinds his teeth. "It's probably better if you don't talk to Jeanine about my mother."

"Why?"

"It's complicated, Beatrice." I can tell that's all he is willing to say and I don't press him further.

"At Erudite there's an enormous library inhabited by the oldest member the of the faction, he was born before the Fall."

"You don't see too many old people in Dauntless." He looks away. I remember what Arnold had told me about many choosing suicide rather than old age, and I wonder if Four had known that before he chose.

"This morning the librarian – we call him the Guardian – he gave me a letter from my father. He wrote it the day before his choosing ceremony."

"What did it say?"

"The first part is about how he and my mother both decided to join Abnegation so that they could be together. She was Dauntless – did you know?"

Four grins. "That figures. But why didn't she just join Erudite?"

I decide to take the risk. I know it's a huge risk. "He found out he was Divergent, and so was my mother. He thought they'd be safer in Abnegation."

I expected to see shock on Four's face, but my admission seems barely to have registered. "And the letter was to warn you, in case you chose Erudite?"

I take a deep breath. "Yes."

"It's OK. I knew. I've known since the Ferris wheel."

"Is it that obvious?"

"No, but we recognize our own kind, don't we?" Until now, Four's eyes have been fixed on the floor in front of him, but he raise them to meet mine. I feel an indescribable mixture of fear and elation. _At least I'm not alone anymore._

I meet his gaze. "Yeah, I guess we do. He talked about a secret society that has been breeding Divergents since the founding of the City."

Now a look of panic crosses his face and he reaches forward and takes my arm. "Listen, you can't tell _anyone_ about this. Nobody, not even your brother. Knowing about the society is dangerous. They are powerful, more powerful and more dangerous even than the people hunting Divergents." He pauses and looks around, warily. "We shouldn't even be talking about it here. Promise me you will never speak another word about this? To anyone?" His eyes are almost pleading.

"I promise."

I look down at his hand, the knuckles white where he is gripping my arm. He follows my gaze and releases me.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you."

"You didn't." I pause. "There's one other thing – in the letter, he said that my mother had also left a letter for me, in case I chose Dauntless. I don't know who she left it with. Do you have any ideas?"

I'm sorry, I don't – and asking the wrong person could put you all in danger."

I nod. It was the answer I expected, but I'm still disappointed.

"C'mon, I'll take you home now."

Once we're back on the train, I remember Linus and the others.

"I can't come tomorrow night."

"Are you OK?"

"it's not that. My brother likes this girl and they're going to a play tomorrow and he wants me to go with them."

"I'm surprised he'd want his sister along."

"Well, he's bringing a friend."

"Oh."

I don't know why this is so awkward, but it is. The silence stretches on. I feel like I need to say something. "I have to look like I'm fitting in."

"I didn't ask you for an explanation."

I have no idea how to respond, so I look out the window, and count the minutes until I get back to Erudite.

I'm in Jeanine's office once again. "It was the same as last night – except this time he taught me how to block."

Jeanine looks annoyed. "Did you talk at all?"

"Not really, Four seemed preoccupied."

"And you didn't think to ask what was bothering him?"

I fidget nervously. "He's not the kind of person who answers that sort of question."

"You just need to work harder at getting him to open up."

"Yes, Jeanine." I am really hoping this is the end of our discussion, but I see it isn't.

"I saw your father today. He asked about you."

I try to sound nonchalant. "How was he?"

"The same, I suppose. We grew up together, went to school together. Of course, he's not the same Andrew I knew. Abnegation likes to suffocate its members; I've never understand his choice. "

I think of his letter once more and the memory is like a stab wound.

"Jeanine, I was wondering, do I have any other relatives in Erudite?"

"You mean, besides me?" _What?_

"You?"

"I'm surprised your father never mentioned it. We're cousins. The Matthews and the Priors have been Erudite since the founding of the faction system. I'm an only child, though. Your father had an older brother, but he died about twelve years ago. Most of the people here are at least distantly related to you, but I'm your closest relative here – besides your brother, of course."

My mind is racing, trying to process this news. I wonder what she knows about her family's involvement with the Divergents. _But how can I ask without giving myself away?_

"Jeanine, you told me to ask you if I had questions about the factions?"

"Yes..?"

"Well, in that book, it said that Divergents weren't allowed back into the City. If that's so, how is it possible for there to be Divergents here now?"

Jeanine sighs. "That's something I haven't quite been able to figure out. It's one of the things I'm hoping the Watchers can help us with. But they _are_ here. We've identified three just this year."

"How do you find them?"

"Mostly through the aptitude test, but occasionally through other means. Why do you ask?"

"Just curious." I marvel again at how easy it is to use curiosity as an excuse. Another avenue of inquiry occurs to me. "What are they like? Are they violent?"

"Some of them are. It depends on the nature of their Divergence. They tend to be highly intelligent, and ruthless. That's what makes them so dangerous."

"What do you do with them, when you find them?"

Jeanine seems surprised by this question.

"We put them down, of course."

It's a simple statement, horrifying in its casualness.

Jeanine yawns. "It's late Beatrice, you should get some sleep. I'll see you tomorrow night."

I remember the play, but I don't want Jeanine to think I'd rather go out with my friends than work for her.

"Four said he can't meet me tomorrow, but I'll see him Sunday night."

"Oh? Very well. Goodnight, Beatrice."

 **Thank you so much for reading and please let me know what you think.** **I really appreciate the reviews.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	19. Chapter 19 The Play's The Thing

It's Saturday and I don't need to go to the Watchers, but I find myself wanting to see Four. When I get there, only Arnold is there.

"You don't have to be here today, you should go relax with your friends."

I shrug. "We're all going to a play tonight."

"Ah, yes. Shakespeare. A brilliant observer of human behavior."

I laugh. "Yeah, and I hear he wrote plays, too."

"It's good to see you laugh, I'm glad you're settling in and making friends"

I nod, and sit down next to him.

"What are you watching?"

"Training. Dauntless don't get Saturdays off."

I roll my eyes. "What is it today, jumping off buildings?"

"No, they do that the first day."

I laugh again.

"No, seriously - that's how the initiates first enter Dauntless – they have to jump off the roof into a big hole, and they can't see what's at the bottom. Want to see?"

"Sure."

"Look, there they are all up on the roof."

Eric is standing in front of the initiates, and it's striking how much they've changed since that day. I wonder if I've changed that much. Many of them are still dressed in the clothing of their original faction. They all look scared. It's clear Eric has just told them they have to jump, but nobody wants to go first. Finally a hand goes up, and a boy walks to the front. He stands on the end of the roof, hesitating, before finally pitching himself over.

"It's quite a thing to be First Jumper. That's Uriah Pedrad. He comes from a long line of Dauntless."

Arnold flips now to a view of the bottom of the hole. There's a huge net, almost like a trampoline, at the bottom. Four is there. He pulls down on the side of the net and Uriah comes tumbling out. He gives him a quick pat on the back when he thinks nobody is watching. But Arnold sees it.

"Uriah's older brother is Zeke Pedrad – he and Four were initiates together. He probably told Four to watch out for him."

Two more initiates fall through the hole into the net, and I wonder to myself if I would have had the nerve to jump. I suppose I would have – what other option would I have had?

"Speaking of Zeke and Four, I have to show you one more thing." Arnold is flipping quickly through computer files, and chuckling to himself. "This happened the night before they played capture the flag – it's hilarious."

Now on the screen, I see Zeke and Four walking near the indoor waterfall at the bottom of the chasm. It's nighttime. Zeke is holding hands with a girl, and there is second girl with them, walking in front of Four.

"That girl with Zeke is Shauna, they've been dating a while now. And by a while, I mean, a couple of months. This is Dauntless, after all. The other girl is Nikki."

Shauna and Zeke quickly move off to a corner and start kissing amorously. Nikki sits on the edge of the river, her feet dangling over the side, almost touching the water. Four sits down next to her. He wipes his palms on the thighs of his pants and without thinking, I do the same. He's clearly nervous, and why not? Nikki is beautiful, she has long blond hair and she's quite curvaceous. She's wearing very tight black leather pants, high-heeled boots, and a very low-cut, sleeveless black shirt. Her arms are covered with elaborate tattoos. My heart sinks. He's going to kiss her, and I'm going to have to pretend to be amused.

"Here it is, watch." Arnold is gleeful. "See? She slides an inch toward him, and he slides an inch away." It becomes clear that what I had initially interpreted as nervousness is actually discomfort. The girl seems oblivious to this, however, and reaches over, taking Four's chin in her hand and moving in to kiss him. I wonder if I could be that bold. In a move that I recognize from our sparring lessons, he brushes her hand away and pushes himself back from her. She's angry now and appears to be shouting. Four looks confused.

"Wait for it…." Now Nikki balls her first and punches him in the stomach. Four is doubled over on the ground. Apparently she hits a lot hard than I do. Arnold is bent over with laughter. "There it is – love, Dauntless style," he sputters. As Nikki storms off, Shauna comes running over, and Zeke is following close behind. She seems to be asking Four what happened. She obviously doesn't like his answer, because she kicks him while he's still lying on the ground. She then runs off, in the same direction as Nikki, and then Zeke starts yelling at him. Four is upright at this point, but still on the ground. He shrugs. Now Zeke is laughing and holds out his arm to help Four up. Once he's upright, Zeke slaps him on the back, and they walk off together.

"Poor Four, not exactly a lady's man." Arnold shakes his head.

"She seemed to be quite interested in him." I try to sound as casual as possible.

"Yeah, they generally are. But he's not too interested in them. This isn't the first date Zeke's arranged for him."

"I wonder why he isn't interested."

"I don't think Dauntless girls are his type, do you?." He fixes me with an unnerving stare. I look away. "Anyways, that's enough of that, we should get back to work."

Arnold flips back to real time monitoring. He's watching the initiates. They're in the training room, sparring. Eric walks back and forth among them. In the far corner, Four is repeatedly hitting and kicking a large red punching bag.

"He doesn't look too happy," murmurs Arnold. "Maybe he should have taken Nikki up on her offer." Arnold zooms in until Four fills the entire screen. His face and arms are covered in sweat, and his shirt is drenched and stuck to him. Through it, I can see the faint outline of an elaborate tattoo, and the muscles in his back that flex every time he throws another punch. He is angry, and not a little bit scary. I wonder briefly if this is the danger of Divergents that Jeanine spoke of. I dismiss the thought. After all, it's just a punching bag.

"What do you think he's angry about?"

"Hard to say, maybe another run in with Eric. The past couple of nights, he's been gone from the Dauntless compound."

"Where did he go?" I ask.

"We don't know, but Jeanine is after us to find out."

"Maybe he just wants some fresh air?'

Arnold purses his lips, and peers at the screen in front of him. "Perhaps…"

I lose track of time watching Four and the other initiates, and suddenly I realize it's almost dinner time. I rush back to my room to find Amy in front of the mirror, readying herself for tonight.

"There you are! I've barely seen you the past few days."

"Sorry Amy, I've been working on something for Jeanine."

"Do you want me to do your hair?"

It's the last thing I want, but Amy is nice and I don't want to offend her.

"Sure." She puts a handful of pins in her mouth and deftly winds my hair into an elaborate twist, pinning it as she goes along. I have to admit, it does look good.

"Wow, thanks Amy!" She smiles brightly.

"Are you going to change your dress?" I'm wearing my standard initiate dress, which is far finer than anything I ever owned in Abnegation. I notice that she is wearing a new dress – it's sky blue and hemmed well above her knee.

I shrug. "I don't have any other dresses."

"We should get you some. It's too bad we didn't have time earlier today. Let's go, we don't want to be late!"

Later on, we're all in the theater, watching the play. It's dark, but I can hear Amy and Caleb kissing on one side of me. With Linus on my other side, constantly sneaking glances at me, I fully sympathize with Four's awkward situation. I smile to myself. At least I can be reasonably sure nobody will punch me.

The play is about two teenagers from warring families. The boy and his friends disguise themselves and sneak into a party at the girl's house and they meet and kiss. Just like that. He sneaks back later that night and they kiss again on her balcony and then agree to get married the next day. At this point in the play, Caleb leans over and whispers to me. "I don't understand why this play is such a big deal, It's so unrealistic. I mean, who acts like that in real life?"

Amy interjects "But it's the best love story ever told! It doesn't have to be realistic to be good."

"if you say so." Caleb smiles at Amy.

I disagree. "I think it's possible to meet someone, and to feel like you've known them your whole life. Like you know them in your soul, and you recognize them."

Caleb raises an eyebrow at me. "Oh really? And has that happened to you recently?" Linus is listening intently.

I shrug. "I don't know."

Amy shushes us both, and I return my attention to the play. It ends badly. The boy ends up accidentally killing the girl's cousin, and he's banished from the city. In the end, they both die by their own hands. As we file out of the theater, I can't help thinking the play was a cautionary tale, just for me. Warring families, or different factions – it's all the same.

"C'mon Beatrice, we're going to the planetarium." Linus reaches his hand out to me, and I decide to take it. Once there, Caleb and Amy find themselves a dark corner, and Linus sits down next to me. I don't know what to say. Apparently, neither does he, so he puts his arm around me. I want to like him. Things would be so much simpler if I did. I turn to him to speak, but at the same moment, he leans over and tries to kiss me. In that split second, I make my decision. I can't do this. I pull back and even though it's dark, I can see the hurt and confusion in his eyes.

"I don't understand, I thought you liked me?" He whispers.

"I do, Linus – I'm sorry." I search for something to offer as an explanation. "It's an Abnegation thing."

"That doesn't seem to be stopping your brother."

I shrug. "I guess we're different."

He sighs, but doesn't seem angry. "Would you like me to walk you back to your room?"

"No, I'll be fine. I'll see you tomorrow."

As I leave, a part of me already regrets my actions. Watching the play and seeing my brother so happy with Amy make me long to be loved like that. Could I have had that with Linus? He's nice enough. It would have been so easy. Quickly I chase those thoughts away. I've never chosen the easy path.

 **Thank you so much for reading and please let me know what you think.** **The next chapter's going to be a good one.** **It's called "Don't Get Distracted".** **I really appreciate the reviews, and will personally respond to all signed reviews.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	20. Chapter 20 Don't Get Distracted

Four seems different tonight when I jump onto the train with him. He leans against the wall instead of taking a seat. One of us has to speak.

"How was your day?" It's a traditional Abnegation greeting and I wish the words back as soon as they leave my mouth. So trite.

"Fine. How was your date?" His voice sounds harsh and he stresses the 't' at the end like he's forcing the word out.

I look him straight in the eye. "Awful. You have no idea."

I can see now he's been holding his breath, and he lets it out in a rush. He grins. "I bet I do."

I know he does, but there's absolutely no way I'm going to tell him that I saw it firsthand.

As he leads me to the warehouse, I think I hear another set of footsteps, but I can't be sure.

"Did you hear that?" I whisper.

His voice is calm. Measured. "Yes, we're being followed. Don't look."

I freeze, but he keeps walking, and I almost stumble. He locks his forearm and I stay upright, leaning on him.

"I'm going to take your blindfold off. There's a doorway to your left. When I tell you, you run there and you stay, no matter what. Understood?"

I nod. He slowly reaches behind me and unties the blindfold. Then he brushes my hair aside to whisper to me. "Be brave. Go."

I don't look back. The doorway was only a few meters and I press myself into the darkness of its recess. It's a moonlit night, and I can see very clearly. There are three of them; they are dressed in tattered clothes and appear to be factionless. They launch themselves at Four. At least one of them has a knife. I should be terrified – I have no idea where I am and I can't get home by myself. Instead, I'm mesmerized. It's clear Four has been holding back in our lessons. He moves with a fluid grace, at once spinning, deflecting, punching, and kicking. It's over in less than a minute. They run back down the alley, the last one limping and calling after the others not to leave him behind.

Four finds me in the doorway. His breath is shallow and rapid. He smooths my hair where the blindfold had been, the heel of his palm grazing the side of my face. His eyes search mine. "You're okay?"

"Yeah." Maybe it's the adrenaline, or his proximity, or the sound of his breathing, or the feel of his hand on my cheek, or the smell of his leather jacket mixed with the smell of _him._ I don't know, but suddenly I'm kissing him, tasting the salt on his lips. As quickly as it started, it ends when he pulls himself away.

He holds me at arm's length. "This is dangerous." He is still out of breath and his chest rises and falls in the same rhythm as mine.

"I know." I answer. I meet his eyes. "Be brave."

With those words, something inside of him is released. He pushes me back against the wall, one hand cupping the back of my head to shield it from the rough exposed brick, the other in the small of my back, pressing me closer to him. His lips find mine and the rest of the world disappears. We melt into each other, cool water and hot flame.

We are like that for hours, or perhaps only seconds when I hear a brief click and feel Four tense against me. I open my eyes to find us surrounded by factionless men, all armed, one with a pistol to Four's head. He slowly lifts his arms, and positions himself between me and them.

The man with the pistol grins, baring several blackened teeth. "Our leader would like to have a little chat with you."

Oddly, these words seem to relax Four. "Fine. But she stays with me, and if you touch her, I kill you." I believe him, and so do they.

"Alright, alright, there's no need to get hostile now."

Four speaks with what I now recognize as tenuously controlled rage. "You have a gun to my head."

"And I hope neither of you gives me a reason to use it."

Four turns back to me and whispers. "It's OK, don't worry."

We walk with them for at least a mile along the ruined streets of the factionless zone before arriving at a tall building, partially burned out. Once inside, we're led toward the elevator. To my surprise, it opens, and we're pushed inside. None of the men accompany us, though. I don't understand what's happening.

Four turns to me once the door closes. "I don't think I'll be able to teach you the third lesson tonight."

"What was it?"

Four reaches down and grazes my cheek with his hand, brushing the pad of his thumb gently across my lips. He smiles at me. "Lesson number three was 'Don't get distracted.'"

Despite the situation, I grin back at him. "I think that's terrible advice."

"You would."

I notice the back of his hand is rubbed raw and bleeding, and take it in mine. "From the brick?"

He shrugs. "It's nothing." I bring his hand to my lips and press them against the broken skin. His eyes close, and he inhales sharply. Without warning, the door opens. I drop his hand.

There is a woman waiting for us. I sweep the room with my eyes. She is alone. She is tall, with dark hair and olive skin. She is familiar. Like someone I've seen in a dream. She's dressed like the other factionless, but has a machine gun strapped to her back. She looks me up and down, but says nothing to me. Instead she turns to Four. "Please don't let me interrupt." She makes a cruel attempt at a smile. I glare at her, but she takes no notice.

"They radioed in that a tall man dressed in black had fought off three of my best men. I knew it could only be the legendary _Four._ " She says his name with an oddly mocking tone. "You really shouldn't wander around here after dark, you've endangered your little friend here."

Four's eyes narrow. "She's none of your concern."

"Oh, I don't know about that – you two look quite cozy. Are you sure you wouldn't rather have my protection?"

Four's voice is cold and measured. "I've survived just fine without your protection ever since I was nine and you left me, - _Mother."_

 **A/N** **I know, I know, I called it a romance and they don't even kiss until Chapter 20.** **I hope it was worth the wait.** **The best first kiss of my life was in a doorway, in the rain, in NYC - it's the only time I've ever kissed someone completely impulsively.**

 **Thank you so much for reading and please let me know what you think.** **I really appreciate the reviews.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	21. Chapter 21 Lady Lazarus

And with that, it starts to fall into place – the empty shroud, and Four's disinclination to discuss his mother.

She sighs impatiently. "Are we going to do this yet again? I left you in the care of your father."

"He was a monster."

"He made you strong."

"I can't believe you're defending him."

She sighs impatiently. "I take much more interest in the future than the past. You'd do well to follow that example."

Four squares his shoulders and lifts his chin defiantly. "Will that be all?"

"You haven't introduced me to your… _friend_." She extends a hand to me, but I don't take it. "My name is Evelyn Johnson, leader of the factionless. And you are…?"

 _They have a leader?_ _And they're armed._ _Why?_ I adopt Four's stance and remain silent.

"She's spunky for an Erudite. Where did you find her, _Four_?" Silence again. I sense she's like a dog with a bone and won't let us leave until she's satisfied. I can't give her my real name. Four must realize this as well.

"This is Tris." _Tris?_ I like the sound of it, familiar, yet tough – functional.

"Tris Matthews," I volunteer.

"You must be related to Jeanine?"

"She's my cousin."

She clearly doesn't like the sound of this at all. She hisses at Four. "Exactly what the _hell_ kind of a game are you playing at? Bringing..." she pauses, gesturing toward me and struggling to find a word to communicate her distaste for me. "Bringing _that_ into my headquarters."

" _You_ brought us here."

"I wanted to talk to you."

Four glares back at her. "So talk."

"Not in front _her,_ you idiot!"

"There's no way I'm leaving her alone with your associates."

"They're soldiers. That's something you should be able to understand. I could have her removed by force."

"I doubt that," responds Four, dryly.

"Then we have reached an impasse. Shall we just scowl at each all night?" Her laugh is false, and too high-pitched.

Four sounds disgusted, but resigned. "If you let us leave, I will come back tomorrow night."

"Will you give me your word?"

"I just did." He spits the words at her.

"Very well then. Get out. And take your trash with you."

I see Four's jaw clench, but he says nothing as he pivots, takes my hand, and walks to the elevator.

Once outside, we walk in silence for at least a mile. The path Four leads us on is circuitous, but I make a point of remembering all of the turns. Finally, Four opens an unmarked door, and motions for me to enter. It appears to have been a store, but now the shelves are bare, and the floor is covered with dead leaves and garbage.

He finds an unbroken chair against the wall and dusts it off.

"Sit?" I comply, and he kneels down next to me.

"You must have been terrified."

I have a million questions. "Four, how long have you known your mother was alive?"

"About a year. I was in the Factionless zone at night – exploring and looking for places to hide. I found her instead."

"How did she become leader of the factionless?"

"When she left Marcus, it was because she was having an affair and had become pregnant. Marcus found out and had her banished, and faked her death to save himself the embarrassment. Turns out being an aggrieved widower does wonders for political careers. She went to be with her lover, who at the time was the leader of this group of factionless. He died a few years later, and she took over. It was shocking – coming face to face with her after so many years of thinking she was dead. You handled it a lot better than I did."

I take a deep breath. "I knew she wasn't dead."

"What? How?"

"At her funeral, I snuck back in and looked in the shroud. It was empty."

"When were you planning on telling me this? You would have let me go on thinking she was dead?"

I can tell he's getting angry. "Look, I was seven, I didn't know what to think, and all I knew was that she wasn't in that shroud".

"Is there anything else you haven't told me?"

I don't know why, but I sense that whatever binds us together is balancing on a knife edge, and if I lie to him now, we'll be lost to each other forever.

"There is one other thing. After the Ferris wheel, when I told Jeanine where I'd been..." I try to find the right words, but I know they don't exist. "She told me that Erudite had accessed Dauntless' computer system and..."

He looks shocked, and I haven't even told him the worst part. "She showed me your fear landscape."

It's as if I've slapped him across the face. "You. Had. No. Right."

"I know. I didn't ask to see it."

You've known all along? You've known about Marcus? How could you not tell me, Beatrice?"

I reach for him and wrap my arms around him. He is shaking. "How could I tell you?" I want to protect him, it's an odd feeling. "It's OK, it's just me."

I can't imagine what it must have been like for him, and I want to take all that pain away from him. "It's OK, it's just you and me, Tris and Four."

He pulls back and looks at me. "Tris is what I imagined your name would be if you'd chosen Dauntless."

"I like it."

He allows himself a shy smile. "That was a nice touch, by the way, saying Jeanine was your cousin. It's probably better if she doesn't find out who you really are."

"But Jeanine _is_ my cousin."

Once more, Four pulls away from me. "What?"

"The Matthews and the Priors have been Erudite since the founding of the faction system." As soon as the words are out of my mouth, I realize that I've said them with the same proud intonation Jeanine had used, when she had said those very same words to me.

"You sound proud of them."

"There's nothing wrong with being smart." I sound more defensive than I mean to.

"That's not what I mean. You realize she's hunting Divergents, don't you? Do you know what would happen to you if she figured out what you are? Do you think being her cousin would save you? Believe me, it wouldn't. She would experiment on you, torture you, and then have you killed."

I know he's right, she said so herself, but I feel like I've been put on the defensive.

"What do you mean, torture?"

"I've seen photos. My mother showed them to me."

"Since when do you trust _her?"_

"I trust her about this. She is Divergent. Her entire group is."

"Is she part of the society?"

I realize as soon as the words are out of my mouth that I've just broken my promise to him. He realizes it too.

"You're too reckless, Beatrice. I can't protect you like this."

I open my mouth to question him further, but he puts his hand over my mouth and gives me a look of warning.

"The train is a block from here, I should get you home." It's clear this conversation is over.

As we walk, I reach out my hand to him, but he casually brushes it away.

"You can't come back here again, it's not safe."

"When will I see you again?"

"Not tomorrow."

"OK, but when then?"

"I don't know. I have to sort some things out."

"What things?"

"It's complicated. I'll get a message to you."

Just then I hear the roar of the train. I start running and pull myself up. Once inside, I look back, but Four is still standing by the track. I shout to him. "How?" But if he answers I don't hear it, and he rapidly disappears in the distance. I sink down to the floor of the train. I've never felt so alone in my life.

 **A/N** **Sorry about this, but it was necessary.** **It just seemed too far out of character for someone like Four to just suddenly have a girlfriend and act normal. Don't worry, he'll sort these 'things' out soon, I promise. Thank you so much for reading and please let me know what you think.** **I really appreciate the reviews.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	22. Chapter 22 Alone

I sleep and dream of Four, and wake to the gentle chirping of an incoming message. In my half-asleep confusion, I hope it's Four, but of course that's impossible. It's Jeanine, summoning me to her office. I am alone.

"Why didn't you come see me last night?"

"I was upset – something happened."

Jeanine looks concerned. "Tell me."

"On our way to the warehouse, we were attacked by some Factionless. Four fought them off."

"How many were there?"

"Three, and they had knives."

Jeanine crosses her arms in front of her. "Impressive. Were you hurt?"

I shake my head no.

What happened next?"

I know that kiss may be the only one I ever have, and I can't bear to share it with her. I decide to skip to the end.

"He said it wasn't safe for me to come anymore."

Jeanine is persistent. "So you're going to meet him somewhere else next time?"

"I don't know." It comes out as a whisper, and though I am trying to hide it, I sound as miserable as I feel. "He said he'd get a message to me, but he didn't say how."

Jeanine paces back and forth for a few minutes.

"This is bad, but I might have a way to get a message to him."

"How?'

"Let's just say I have someone in Dauntless."

 _Four was right, she does have someone on the inside._ "Who?"

She looks at me strangely. "That's not something you need to know. If it's possible to send a message, I'll let you know. Would he recognize your handwriting?"

"No."

"Well, in the meantime then, you'll need to think of something to put in the message that will let him know it's really from you."

"OK. But I don't think he'll be willing to see me again. I'm sorry Jeanine."

"He cares about you. He'll come around."

I'm not so sure, and the rest of the day passes in a dull gray haze. My lunch tastes like cardboard and I choke it down quickly. I hurry to the Watchers, hoping and dreading that I'll see Four on the monitors. When I arrive, Arnold is watching the training room, and though he cycles through a number of other views, Four is nowhere to be found - not even in the control room.

"Arnold, I'm curious – how did you get the cameras into Dauntless?"

"It wasn't me. I don't know how they got there, and Jeanine won't tell me. I have a theory, though."

"Tell me."

"Well, it's just a hunch, but the cameras started going up the day Four arrived. He was a weak, skinny little boy when he got there. He was the last to jump. But he managed to pull himself up from the bottom of his class to the top, practically overnight. He has no family, hardly any friends. He fits the profile. I think he was a factionless orphan living on the street that Jeanine found and enlisted as a spy."

I'm shocked that Arnold, such a gifted observer, could be so wrong about him.

"No way. I don't see it."

"You don't _want_ to see it, because you like him. Go on, admit it."

"You like him, too."

"I do, and that's why I suspect him. We'd like to think it was someone like Max – or Eric, even - somebody easy to hate, but that's the trap. Jeanine's too clever for that."

"But it's not us she's trying to fool, it's Dauntless."

"True – but you'll see. He has a secret, I'm sure of it. Think about it, Beatrice. It explains everything, even his recent late-night absences. I bet he's meeting with someone working for Jeanine."

I freeze. I know I have to shut this down. But how?

"You know, I think you might be right." I say.

"Really?"

"Yeah, if you want, I can ask Jeanine about it next time I see her. I think I would be able to tell from her reaction."

Arnold blanches. "No way. Absolutely not. She'll think I put you up to it. Let's just change the subject?"

"OK, Arnold."

It takes me hours to fall asleep that night. I go over everything in my mind, again and again. I've ruined things with Four, and I'll never see him again. No, that's not true, actually I'll see him every day, but from a distance, on the monitors in the Watchers. It's far worse. Mercifully, when I finally do sleep, I am dreamless. I awake to the sound of Amy humming.

"Beatrice, you're up early."

"Yeah, I'm coming to problem solving with you this morning."

"Oh good, it'll be fun." I wish I had her cheerfulness.

As it turns out, problem solving is a disaster. Athena looks surprised to see me, but says nothing when I enter the room and take a seat. I make mistake after mistake. I can't think straight. Athena is behind me now, clipboard in hand, and making a disapproving clicking sound with her tongue.

"Beatrice, what's going on with you today? I don't think it would be a good idea for you to miss any more problem solving sessions."  
"I don't think that's going to be an issue anymore."

"Oh? Well, OK then. It's good to have you back."

I smile weakly, hoping she'll leave me alone. I turn back to the computer screen, trying to clear my mind. Instead, though, I keep thinking of messages to send to Four. I wish I could figure out who Jeanine's person in Dauntless is. If I did, I couldn't write it in the message, though. What could I write, that would prove it was me? I have no idea. I wish I had jumped off that train and had run back to him. But what if I had? Would I have begged him to reconsider? Just the idea of it leaves an unpleasant taste in my mouth. No, this is better. A clean break.

That afternoon on the way to the Watchers, I am even more sure that it was never meant to be. I even start to toy with the notion of patching things up with Linus. I resolve to spend more time with my other friends. This is my life now.

Of course, all that common sense vanishes completely the minute I walk through the door and see Four on the screen.

"Take a look at this, it's interesting."

Four and another young man are huddled together at a small table in the corner of the Pit. I recognize him as Zeke, from the night of Four's unfortunate date. They're both drinking beer and talking animatedly. Zeke is gesticulating broadly and nodding his head, as if he's trying to talk his friend into something. He's banging his fist on his chest, over his heart, even, to make his point. Four looks glum and is shaking his head, he seems to disagree with whatever Zeke is suggesting. This goes on for some time.

"Do you think they're plotting something?" I ask Arnold.

He chuckles. "No, not this time. Sad guy in a corner with a beer? That's woman trouble."

"Maybe Zeke is trying to convince him to go on another double-date?"

Arnold laughs out loud at this. "God, I hope so."

As we watch, Zeke jumps to his feet, and seems to be pointing off in the distance, his mouth emphatically forming the word "Go." Four stands up as well, but much more slowly. He hold his hands up in a gesture of defeat, and Zeke slaps him on the shoulder with a broad smile. Four walks away from the table, with Zeke calling after him with what look like words of encouragement. My heart sinks.

"Ooh, let's see what happens next." Arnold is practically rubbing his hands together in glee. I think I may be sick. We look for him on the other views of the Pit, then in the cafeteria, then the Chasm. Finally we find him alone, in the control room. I let out an audible sigh of relief, but Arnold is too intent on the screen to notice. Four's back is to us, but the screens in front of him are not turned on. _What is he doing?_ _Thinking?_ This goes on a few moments more, but then, it's as if he's made some sort of decision. He leans forward, and begins scribbling something on a sheet of paper.

"Maybe he's writing Nikki an apology letter?" I ask, trying to sound casual.

"I wouldn't think so. Dauntless don't do apologies – or letters for that matter."

We keep watching, and it doesn't take long. He pauses for a moment. Then, carefully and resolutely, he tapes the sheet of paper over the front of the biggest monitor on the desk, right in the middle. He stands up and walks out of the room, without looking back. Arnold quickly zooms in to see what's on the paper.

"Weird. What do you make of that?" wonders Arnold.

I lean forward and peer at the screen. It's crudely drawn, but unmistakable. A Ferris wheel.

 **A/N** **See?** **I told you it would be OK!** **Thank you so much for reading and please let me know what you think.** **I really appreciate all of the reviews. BTW, the avatar picture for this story is my own crude drawing of a Ferris wheel, taped to my computer screen. seemed _a propo_.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	23. Chapter 23 Amor Vincit Omnia

**A/N:** **I was going to wait until tomorrow to post this, but in the spirit of the day, I find that I cannot wait.** **These last few chapters have practically written themselves, but I am now horrifyingly behind with my work.** **So, this one may have to tide you over for a bit.**

After dinner, I pull Amy aside, my hand shaking.

"I have a favor to ask."

"Anything, Beatrice, of course."

"Can I borrow that dress you wore the other night?"

"Sure, when do you need it?"

"Now." Her eyes widen.

"What are you up to?"

I smile enigmatically. "It's a secret."

She giggles. "No problem. Want me to do your hair?"

"Please."

Now that I've made it down to the Navy Pier, I start to wish I'd worn a coat. And maybe something that covered my legs. It's completely quiet, and I look out over the bare expanse that was once Lake Michigan. He's not coming. I've made a ridiculous mistake. It was foolish of me to think that drawing was for me, and to put on this dress, and to jump on a train.

"I see you got my message."

Relief rushes through me as I turn and find Four standing behind me. He's holding a small cardboard shoebox and he's got a backpack slung over one shoulder. There's so much I want to say.

"Yes."

He's silent for a moment, watching me. I can tell he notices the dress but he doesn't comment on it.

"My friend Zeke told me to give you this." He steps forward to hand me the box.

"What is it?"

"Cake."

This isn't exactly what I was expecting, but I accept it from him.

C'mon, let's sit down." He opens his backpack and takes out a black wool blanket and spreads it on the grass. I sit down carefully, and open the box. The cake is chocolate with chocolate frosting and it's huge.

"I don't think I can eat all of this."

Four grins and pulls out two forks. "I'll help. I love this stuff."

I accept a fork and take a bite. It's like heaven. I thought the Erudite food was amazing, but nothing could have prepared me for this. It has the most wonderful texture, and the frosting is impossibly sweet and creamy. I take another bite. And then another. Four is watching me and grinning.

"My first month in Dauntless, I gained 30 pounds and grew two inches just eating that cake."

I lick the frosting from my lips. "It's delicious, what's in it?"

"He wouldn't say, exactly, but I think it must have a lot of protein, and also something that stimulates appetite."

I offer the box back to him, and he takes a bite.

"You told your friend about me? Isn't that dangerous?"

"I didn't tell him any details, just that you were from another faction. I trust him."

"What did he say?"

"I thought he'd be angry, but he just laughed at me. His family has been Dauntless since the beginning, and so he tends to have a very different perspective on… things. Then he said I was being an idiot."

I chuckle between bites and almost choke. "Really?"

"He was right." He's watching me now, shyly, to see how I react.

I know this is the only apology I'm going to get. I smile to show him I accept it. "I think you're lucky to have such a smart friend."

He takes my hand and laces our fingers together. "Now I have two smart friends."

I feign seriousness for a moment. "I'm not your friend."

I see a brief moment of panic cross his face. "No?"

I lean toward him and find his mouth with mine. This kiss is different than our first, less urgent, but no less wonderful. When we finally come up for air, he laughs.

"Right." He murmurs. "Definitely not my friend."

"Is there any cake left?"

"One last bite." Four scoops it up with his fork and feeds it to me, his hand gently supporting my chin. I lay back on the blanket, looking up at the stars. Four does the same. This time the silence is not awkward, it's Abnegation silence. I never realized how comforting it could be. It feels like… _home._ I don't want to break the spell.

The night is getting cooler by the minute, though, and I shiver. Four takes off his jacket and hands it to me. I sit up and put it on. The leather is worn and smells like him. Having it on makes me feel warm, and protected. He's wearing just a thin t-shirt now and I can see goosebumps forming on his forearms. He is untroubled by the cold, though.

"You look good in my jacket."

I am bold. "You look good without it." Four tenses and looks away. It's clear he's not used to complements. I want him to accept it though, to accept that I like looking at him. So I don't break my gaze. He's kneeling in front of me. I do the same. He takes one of my hands in his, I take the other in mine. He moves to kiss me, but I don't let him. Instead, I slowly sweep my eyes upward along one perfectly formed arm, strong but lean, to where the sleeve of his shirt begins. Then over his chest, I can see the outline of his muscles as they stiffen under my gaze. Then up to his neck, two licks of flame drawn on either side. I see him swallow nervously, but he doesn't stop me as I continue all the way down to the opposite wrist.

"Do you want to see my tattoo?"

"You'll be cold."

"I don't care." He reaches one arm over his head and pulls his shirt off with one deft tug. He hesitates then, unsure what to do next. He is a masterpiece. I walk on my knees until I'm behind him. His back is covered from waist to neck in black fire, except for a column of symbols down the center. They are the signs for each of the five factions. I reach out my hand and touch a flame, and the muscles of his back flex instinctively. I reach around him with one arm and fit my chin into his shoulder. I squeeze him tightly and whisper into his ear. "Be brave." In response to my words, I feel him relax. With one finger, I trace a flame from beginning to end, and I can feel ridges of raised tissue underneath the ink. Slowly, horribly, I realize that every single flame is covering a scar.

"Oh my God." It's all I can say. I put my arms around him and he takes both of my hands and pulls them tighter. I lay my cheek on his damaged back and press myself into him, as if I'm trying to take the pain away – to take it into myself instead.

Slowly he unwraps my arms and pulls me around to face me.

"Why?' I ask.

"Because I reminded him of her." I recall his silent scream, and I hate her for leaving him.

"I'm so sorry." I know those words are so insufficient.

"It doesn't matter. I'm Dauntless now."

"It _does_ matter."

"I'm glad it happened. I would never have left Abnegation, otherwise. With what's coming, I'm glad I'm strong. I'm glad I can protect myself." He pauses, and lifts his hand to my face, slowly tucking a stray lock of hair behind my ear. "I'm glad I can protect the person I love." It comes out almost as a whisper, and it's a moment before I process it fully.

"We'll protect each other." I say the words fiercely as I push him backwards onto the blanket. Remembering his torn knuckle, this time I cradle his head in my hand. His lips are soft, mine are insistent. I stretch myself out along the length of his body. The feel of so much contact is intoxicating, like the night he caught me on the Ferris wheel. I roll, and take him with me, pulling him on top of me. He pushes himself up on one arm and strokes my hair with the other. Now he is the insistent one, sliding a knee between my legs to balance himself and kissing me with abandon. I answer him by wrapping my legs around him and pressing him even closer to me. I can feel the heat from his bare chest, radiating through the thin fabric of Amy's dress. I feel a heartbeat, but I can't tell if it's his or mine.

I reach up and take his face in my hands, willing him to open his eyes. "I love you Four" The look he gives me next is the only answer I need.

"I know."

 **A/N** **Nothing says 'sorry' like a big piece of chocolate cake!** **Is it hot in here?** **I wasn't originally intending for it to go quite so far, physically or emotionally, but it's 6/26/2015 as I write this, and SCOTUS just ruled that marriage equality is the law of the land, and I'm feeling like love is in the air.** **The title of this chapter was just going to be 'Together', but again, in the spirit of the day, I've changed it.** **Thank you so much for reading and please let me know what you think.** **really appreciate all of the reviews.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	24. Chapter 24 Blame it on the Cake

_From Four's perspective._

I wake with an unbelievable headache. I can actually hear something pounding inside my head. Wait, no, that's my door. Someone is pounding on my door. _God, what time is it?_ I grope blindly for pants, put them on, and stagger barefoot to answer it. It's Zeke.

"Damn, Four. You look like crap." Zeke steps through the door without invitation and glances around my apartment. "She here?"

"What? No, of course not."

"So dude, what _happened?_ "

"She liked the cake."

At this, Zeke emits a high-pitched giggle, but stifles it immediately. "I bet she did. C'mon – how did it go?"

"It went well."

"That's all I get? I single-handedly salvage your love life and all I get is _"_ _it went well"_?

I allow myself a grin. "Alright, alright. It went _very_ well."

He slaps me on the back. "My man. I knew you had it in you. So, uh, where's the rest of the cake?"

"We ate it all – sorry."

Zekes eyes widen. He looks worried. "You ate it _all_? I told you not to eat it all."

"Then why did you give it to me? Anyways, she ate most of it. What was I supposed to do, snatch it back out of her hands?"

" _She_ ate most of it? Uh, is she a big girl? Tall?"

"No. Why?"

I notice now that Zeke is slowly backing away from me. He glances toward the door.

"How was she acting? Different?"

"I guess."

"How exactly? Was she….. _affectionate?_ "

This is definitely not something I want to be discussing with anyone, even Zeke. He knows me well enough to interpret my silence correctly.

"Now Four, I need you to take a deep breath…"

I spring toward him, locking his arm behind him and pushing his face into the wall.

"You have three seconds to tell me what was in that cake."

"Okay, Okay. Just let me go."

"Now."

"It's my mother's recipe. It's got some kind of special bread crumbled up into it. She used to bake it for my dad when they would get into a fight. She called it her 'magic make-up cake'."

"What's in the bread, Zeke?"

"I don't know, I swear. C'mon, Four."

"Let's take a walk."

When we get to Zeke's mother's apartment, his mother Hana is in the kitchen. She greets me with a wide smile. Under normal circumstances, I'd return it.

"Four, it's been way too long. Sit down and let me feed you." This has always been the first thing she says to me, ever since I was an initiate. I nudge Zeke roughly. "Ask her."

"Uh Mom? Yeah, so Four was having some…" He glances toward me apologetically. I glare back. "Some _woman_ trouble. So I thought I'd make him some of your special cake."

"Oh Lord, no. You gave Four my magic cake?" She starts to giggle, and ends up doubled-over, hardly able to contain herself. This sets Zeke off once more. I've had enough and I slam the palm of my hand down on the kitchen table, much harder than I had intended. It gets their attention.

"Enough. _She_ ate most of the cake."

Hana turns to Zeke. "How much did you give him?" Zeke makes a large rectangle with his thumbs and forefingers. Hana's eyes widen, and she's not laughing any more.

"Who is she? You'd better go check on her."

"She's not here."

"What do you mean she's not here?"

"She's not Dauntless."

"Oh." She shakes her head and whistles through her teeth. "Boy, you never take the easy path, do you?"

"Is she going to be OK?"

"Yeah, she'll be OK. She'll just be extra friendly for a bit." She makes the mistake of catching her son's eye, and they start giggling again. "She might have a bit of nausea, too, but it'll pass."

"Tell me what's in that cake."

"Well, I have a friend in Amity, she was Dauntless-born – one of my best friends, and we figured out a way to keep in touch. Anyways, when she sees me, she bring me some of their bread. The bread just makes you friendly, but one day years ago I tried putting it in the cake and bam! Fireworks. It must be the appetite stimulant."

The room is starting to spin. "Oh God. I drugged her."

"I wouldn't put it like that. The Amity eat that bread all the time."

"Yeah," interjects Zeke, "she'll probably never know."

I can feel my anger growing, physically. "She'll figure it out. She's Erudite. And besides, that's not the point and you know it."

"Erudite?" Zeke is incredulous. "I thought she was some stiff-girl you left behind."

"Careful, Zeke." I warn him.

"Sorry. So what's she _like?_

Now I want Zeke to feel the full weight of what he's done.

"She's brave. She's smart." I glare at him again. "She's sixteen."

Zeke is chastened. "I'm sorry Four, truly. I'll make it up to you."

"You're lucky you're my only friend."

"So you're always telling me. Now, exactly how brave is she?"

I think of the Ferris wheel. "Borderline reckless. Even by Dauntless standards"

Zeke smiles. "Excellent. I like her already. Listen, I have a plan…."

As expected, Zeke's plan to fix things is even crazier than the plan that got me into this mess in the first place. Maybe it's the aftereffects of the cake, but somehow I let him talk me into it. Unfortunately, the plan involves telling one more person about Tris, and I'm not happy about that.

We knock on Shauna's door and a few moments later, and she answers. Zeke wastes no time in coming to the point.

"Hey beautiful, my man here needs to borrow some of your clothes."

Shauna, still unhappy with me over the failed double-date, fixes me with an unpleasant stare. "I didn't realize that was your thing, Four."

I can't risk antagonizing her further, so I choose my tone carefully. "They're not for me," I answer quietly.

Zeke flashes his most winning smile at Shauna and steps inside, pausing to kiss her before seating himself at the table. I follow him.

"See, we're going on a little mission tonight." Zeke begins.

"Mission?"

"Four has a situation."

"…that you created." I interject. I'm losing my patience quickly.

"And why is that my problem?"

Zeke leans forward now, taking her hand in his. "Because our friend needs our help."

"He's _your_ friend."

"C'mon Shauna, please?" He begs.

I sigh. This is getting us nowhere. "Shauna, I'll take a training shift for you."

"Three."

"Fine."

She takes a seat. "Now what's this all about?"

"It's a secret." Zeke begins. "You have to swear."

Shauna rolls her eyes, but holds up her right hand. "Dauntless Honor."

"Alright, here's what happened…"

Zeke quickly tells her about the cake and his plan. I can tell Shauna isn't pleased, but it doesn't stop her from laughing at my expense.

"So who is this girl?"

"Her name is Tris." I answer.

"And she's Erudite?"

I nod.

"And you like her?"

I shift uncomfortably in my chair.

"C'mon, Shauna, he's barely able to admit he likes _me._ " Zeke laughs.

She gives it right back to him. " _Nobody_ wants to admit they like you."

Zeke motions as if he's been struck in the heart, but it's all for show.

"So what do you think?" asks Zeke.

"What do I think? I think you're both nuts. It's dangerous and stupid. It has no chance of working."

"So you're in?"

Shauna grins. "Of course I'm in. When do we leave?"

"Tonight."

 **A/N** **Thank-you** **triseat0n for suggesting another chapter from Four's perspective. Much like Tris and Four, I woke this morning realizing I may have gotten a little carried away on Friday when I posted Chapter 23. But then I realized that Tris and Four had an excuse. It's funny, when I started this story, I had it all planned out, but it seems to have taken on a life of its own, and it's already taken several sharp turns that I hadn't planned. Strangely, though, every time it happens, I think the story gets a bit etter.**

 **This chapter in particular is different in tone than many of the others – it's more lighthearted. It might seem a bit jarring, but this chapter and the next one are really meant to demonstrate some of the relationships that are going to be important to the plot later on.**

 **As always, I appreciate your suggestions and comments. Reviews are like crack to me, truly.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	25. Chapter 25 Free As A Bird

The minute I laid down in my own bed last night, it hit me. I'd lost my mind. I couldn't figure out what had come over me. I played back the things I had said and done, and I actually felt ill. I barely know him and I told him that I loved him. _You took things way too far, Beatrice._ As I contemplated how I would ever look him in the eye again, another wave a nausea washed over me. I quickly raced to the bathroom and spent the next several hours vomiting. My only comfort had been that at least I had something to take my mind off of Four and the mess I had made with him.

Today went by in a complete and awful haze. Problem solving, lunch, Watchers. No sign of Four, thankfully. During dinner, my mind began to clear and I realized I had two options. The first one – the _smart_ one, was to never, ever, get on that train again. The second - the one I knew I would take – was to jump on that train again this very night and find out just how much of a mess I'd made. I've never chosen the easy path. I had to see him. And right now I'm waiting for the train. I can hear it coming. I want to run back to Erudite but I force myself to stay put. And then I see him, in the doorway.

When he pulls me into the car, I'm instantly reassured. And that's when I realize we're not alone. I gasp and start backing away from them, but Four is right behind me. He puts his hands on both of my shoulders, steadying me.

"It's OK," Four says. "These are my friends Zeke and Shauna."

"This is Tris."

They're both staring at me with the same odd expression, like I'm an animal in a zoo. I stare back, not knowing what to say. Zeke is tall like Four, but stockier. Shauna has streaks of purple in her hair, piercings in her lip and eyebrow, and the usual complement of Dauntless tattoos. I wonder if I look as strange to them as they do to me. I wait for Four to explain what's going on, but it's Zeke who breaks the silence.

"You're probably wondering why we're here." Zeke takes a deep breath. "I did something stupid." At this, Shauna half laughs, half snorts. Zeke shoots her a warning look, and she quiets. He turns back to me.

"See, I gave Four some cake to give to you." He glances nervously at Four, but then smiles apologetically at me. "And uh, I should have told him what was _in_ the cake."

He sits down on a bench and Shauna sits next to him. Four sits down across from them, and motions me to sit next to him. I wonder if I should take his hand, but he's staring intently at Zeke and I can't read him.

I find my voice. "What was in the cake?" It's pitched too high, and I resolve to control it.

"Well, _regular_ Dauntless cake just has a lot of protein in it and an appetite stimulant. Helps you build muscle."

"OK."

"So, um… Tris – It's probably nothing, but did anything … _unusual_ happen after you ate it?"

This time when I look to Four, he's looking back at me intently. The second our eyes meet, we both yank them away and back to Zeke as quickly as we can. I realize that he's as embarrassed as I am.

Shauna sees it, too, and stifles another laugh.

I try to make my voice sound natural. "Like what?"

I can see Zeke is getting even more nervous. "Oh man… well, it's kind of hard to explain…"

Shauna can barely control herself. "Go on, Zeke, explain what you mean by _un-us-u-al."_

At this, the pair collapse into giggles. I don't even see the knife until it's lodged in the seatback, less than an inch from Zeke's head. This silences them both, but instead of fear, I only see mild annoyance – maybe amusement, even, on Zeke's face. He pulls the knife out and tosses it back to Four.

"You know I hate it when you do that."

"Quit playing around, Zeke. Tell her what was in the cake."

"It's my mom's recipe. She puts Amity bread in it. Sometimes the combination can make people act a little, uh, _different._ "

I get it, now. Amy had told me about the bread. It all makes sense now. Friendliness plus appetite stimulant equals… whatever _that_ was. There's no way I'm going to let them continue laughing at me. Or Four. I put on my best Jeanine Matthews voice.

"That's interesting Zeke, but I don't recall doing anything I wouldn't have done ordinarily." I find Four's hand next to mine and squeeze it. "Maybe it doesn't work on the Erudite." Four squeezes my hand back.

Zeke's body sags with relief. "Wow, OK, phew! That's great. Well, no harm done – right Four?"

"I guess not." He still sounds unconvinced, though.

I glance over at Shauna. She's watching me and Four, a bemused half-smile on her face. I can see she's not as easily fooled as Zeke, but she says nothing.

"Well Tris, either way, we're going to make it up to you. We're going on a little picnic, and there's a surprise for you at the end."

I look to Four, wondering if I should trust them, but he looks relaxed.

"It's time to jump."

We're in Dauntless territory, in a square between several tall buildings, but they all seem unconcerned as they spread a blanket on top of the concrete and start unpacking their backpacks. Zeke hands out hamburgers and Shauna deftly tosses us each a muffin. I'm curious about Four's friends. Four seems to find their casual teasing banter relaxing, though he doesn't join in much. I feign disappointment at the muffin. "What, no cake?"

Zeke and Shauna laugh, and even Four smiles. "I like this girl."

With that, we start eating. Zeke and Shauna were both Dauntless born, and entertain me with stories from their childhood. "Yeah, it was quite a shock for Four here, growing up Stiff." Zeke playfully punches him in the arm. "We're still working on loosening him up."

"Yeah, but would you believe that Four taught me how to fight?" Shauna tells me. "I'd be factionless if it weren't for him."

"He's teaching me to fight, too." I tell them.

"Really?" She looks me up and down. "I'm surprised you're not covered in bruises."

"He doesn't actually hit me."

Shauna gives Four the same odd smile she gave me on the train.

"I was hoping you might come one night and help me train her." Four asks.

Shauna looks me up and down, the doubt apparent on her face. "Really? She looks small."

"She's tough." Four answers.

"And after tonight she'll be one of us." Zeke turns to me. "You need to understand what that means, though, Tris."

Shauna rolls her eyes, "Here's where Zeke gets poetic."

"C'mon, this is important. See, we're soldiers – warriors. At any moment we can be called to lay down our lives. Courage is important, sure, but what propels a soldier into battle is his honor. A sacred pledge to his fellow soldiers. I'd call it trust, but it goes way beyond that. Being Dauntless isn't about pulling stunts, or throwing crazy parties, or having a bunch of tattoos. We do all that because we know we could die tomorrow, and so we live without regrets. We live now, we leave nothing unsaid. We're all heart – and _that's_ what being Dauntless means. Four and Shauna – and any other Dauntless soldier - they know I'd walk through fire for them, and I know they would do the same for me. And because of that, we're invincible. It's like the ancient Spartans. Each man went into battle with a spear and a shield. But his shield wasn't for his own protection, it was to protect the man to his left. And in turn, the man to his right protected him. They _got_ it, they understood this thing we have. And they were _legendary._ "

I glance at Shauna and despite her earlier mocking, I can see a faint sheen coating her eyes. Four is watching Zeke intently and nodding. In that moment, I get it, too.

Zeke continues. "Four trusts you, and because of that, _we_ trust you. We're going to take you someplace that's only for us Dauntless. Shauna's going to give you some clothes to change into. If we're caught, it could be very bad for all of us. And it's dangerous. But if we pull it off, it'll be something you'll never forget." Zeke is leaning forward now, watching my reaction carefully. "So Tris, are you in?"

I don't even think about it. "I'm in."

With that, Zeke lets out a loud whoop, Shauna claps, and Four grins. "So, uh, what did I just agree to?" I ask.

"Just come with us." Says Zeke. "Four's going to meet us on the other side."

I don't like the idea of being separated from him. I look to Four.

"It's OK." He reassures me. "Go."

I look back at Zeke and Shauna, still wavering, despite my earlier bravado.

"You trust them?" I ask Four.

"With his life." Interjects Zeke.

"No, more than that, I trust them with _yours._ " He smiles at me now. "Be brave." And with that he turns and starts running down the empty City street.

"C'mon, let's go." Shauna motions to me. I follow her and Zeke to the tallest building in the square. Once inside, Zeke finds the stairs and starts ascending. Shauna pulls me aside and takes from her backpack a pair of black pants and a black shirt and hands them to me. "We don't expect to find many people up there, it's supposed to be closed tonight, but if anybody asks, you're my little sister Lynn. Got it? I nod and start to change. "Listen, Tris?"

"Yeah?"

"One other thing. Zeke gave me some of that cake once, too." I pause, one leg into my borrowed pants. "It doesn't make people do things they don't want to do. It just makes it easier to do the things you already _want_ to do. I just thought you should know." I smile back but say nothing, continuing to dress.

"How do I look?"

"Dauntless." She replies, approvingly. "C'mon, we need to get to the roof."

We finally make it there, and once outside, I am awestruck by the view. Except for us, it's completely deserted.

"This is amazing!"

"You ain't seen nothing, yet!" exclaims Zeke. He's standing by the edge, and I notice that there is a series of cables attached to the building that seems to run high above the entire Dauntless sector. Suspended from one of the cable is a kind of harness. "It's called a zipline. We strap you in here, and it takes you out over the City. When you get to the end, you pull the brake here. Simple, right?"

Looking out over the City and realizing how high we are, it sounds anything but simple, but there's no way I'm backing out now. I grin. "Let's do it!"

Zeke laughs and high fives Shauna. "That's my girl! You ready?"

Shauna helps me up into the harness and checks each strap.

"Ready."

And then he lets go…

And I'm flying.

The wind is screaming in my ears and my hair is whipping around my face. I hold my arms out as if they're wings, and feel myself gliding through the air. Up ahead, I can see that the cable is threaded through a damaged building, so I tuck my arms in as I whip through the tunnel. When I come out the other side, there is a building to my left that is so close I can almost touch it. Its façade is mirrored, and I watch myself as I fly. Nothing can touch me here, and all of the problems that surround me back on the ground are forgotten. Then it's down, down, down in a deep, terrifying, exhilarating dive. I can see in front of me now a painted bullseye on the brick face of a building that is directly in my path. I reach back and grapple for the brake. It takes a few tries, but I finally grasp it and pull with all my strength. I stop only inches from the wall, gasping and thrilled.

Four is here and he reaches up to unhook me. I drop into his arms and he cradles me there for a moment, before setting me gently onto my feet.

There are no words, so I reach up and pull him into a kiss. He wraps his arms around me, and I am, once again, _home._

 **A/N As always, I appreciate your suggestions and comments.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	26. Chapter 26 Back on the Ground

Moments later, Zeke and Shauna arrive on the ziplines, cheering and laughing. Four and I pull away from each other, unable to forget our Abnegation upbringings. Zeke and Shauna have no such inhibitions, and grab us both while they jump up and down. Zeke plants a kiss on my cheek and Shauna puts her arm around me.

"I thought you'd pansycake out up there, but you went for it!" She exclaims.

After we all calm down a bit, Zeke turns to me, rather sheepishly, "So I'm forgiven?"

"Of course you're forgiven, that was amazing!" I grin.

"But pull another stunt like that and…" begins Four.

"I know, I know." Zeke raises both hands in mock surrender. "You'll gut me."

"Exactly."

We almost don't hear the footsteps over the sound of our laughter, but I recognize the voice as it calls to us, even from a distance. It's Eric.

"Hey! Who's back here?"

We all freeze – we're cornered, with no place to run or hide.

I pull Four to me. "Kiss me."

"What?"

"Kiss me. Push me against the wall and hide my face."

Zeke catches on. "Quick, Four - do it! We'll get rid of Eric."

Just as Eric makes it around the corner, Four shoves me roughly against the wall, and puts his left forearm up to hide my face. I glance down and see his right hand moving toward his knife. "It's OK." He whispers. "We'll protect you."

I can't see what's going on, but I hear Zeke calling to Eric as he walks toward him. "Hey man, what's up?" He sounds as glib as ever.

I estimate that Eric is now only about ten meters away from where we are, hidden in a shadow in the corner of the alleyway. "I saw somebody go down the zipline. It's supposed to be closed tonight. High winds."

"Oh c'mon Eric, there's hardly any wind." Shauna answers.

"Do I have to explain to you two again why it's necessary to follow orders?"

"Hey, sorry man, I just wanted to show my girl a good time."

"But I saw three…."

He sees us now. My pulse quickens. I can feel Four doing the breathing exercises the Abnegation teach children to calm themselves, but I'm too frightened to attempt them, so I hold my breath, willing myself to be invisible.

"Wait, is that Four? He went down the zipline?"

"No, uh, he brought a friend."

I hear a low whistle, presumably Eric.

"The legendary _Four_ \- human after all." Four tenses, tightening his grip on his knife. "Who is she?"

"Now c'mon Eric, a gentleman doesn't ask a question like that."

Eric's voice is biting. "Since when do you give lectures on being a gentleman?"

Zeke giggles. "OK, you might have a point there, but Four…"

"Why won't you tell me who she is?"

"Listen Eric, you can wait around here until they come up for air, but it looks like it might take a while…" Interjects Shauna. She lowers her voice now. "But hey, if you want it to get around that you like to _watch_ …"

"I never liked you." hisses Eric.

"What a coincidence." Shauna retorts.

"Get back to Dauntless. Now. Training is bright and early, 0600."

"Actually, Four is taking my shift."

"Really? Well, it looks like I'll have some fun tomorrow, then. Goodnight, lovebirds."

Only when his footsteps fade to silence does Four relax and pull me away from the wall.

Zeke exhales loudly. "Whoah, that was close."

"Eric won't let this go," worries Shauna.

"Let me worry about Eric. Go back to Dauntless. I'll take Tris home."

When we get to Erudite, Four reaches into his pocket and pulls out a data disk. "This is in case you need to get me a message. Put it in any Erudite computer and it will create a tunnel to the Dauntless control room."

"How?"

Four grins. "Let's just say the Erudite aren't the only ones who know how to use a computer. This code will piggyback any message from you on top of the transmissions they are using to hack our system. Don't use it too often, though – only if it's absolutely necessary."

I wonder how he learned to do this, but then I remember that Four's mother had been Erudite. "You never did tell me your tests results…", I probe shyly.

He smiles back. "No, I didn't. Goodnight, Tris."

It's not until I'm in the elevator on the way to Jeanine's that I realize I'm still wearing Shauna's Dauntless clothes. Outside, they had seemed so comfortable, but now they contrast starkly with my white and blue surroundings, and I feel more out of place than ever. Still, I'm not as nervous as I usually am when I enter her office. Tonight I know just what to tell her.

"Beatrice, what a pleasant surprise. You've seen Four?"

I nod yes.

"I knew you'd fix things." She pauses, looking me up and down. "Why are you wearing those clothes?"

I sit down. "Oh, they gave them to me."

"They?"

"Tonight when I met Four on the train, he had two friends with him."

"Who were they?"

"Their names were Zeke and Shauna."

Jeanine looks pensive. "I don't think it's a good idea for the other Dauntless to know about you." She smiles. "It could be dangerous for Four."

"I was surprised, too, but he seems to trust them."

"So what happened?"

"We had a picnic."

"That doesn't sound very Dauntless."

"And then we went down the zipline."

She seems genuinely curious. "What was it like, were you terrified?"

"A little bit at first, but it was so amazing, it felt like flying."

Ever the analyst, Jeanine finds the inconsistency. "Wait, isn't Four afraid of heights?"

"Yeah, he waited for us at the other end."

"I see. And then what?"

I know she's going to like this part. "He kissed me."

"Just like that?"

"Yeah."

Jeanine jumps up and rushes over, hugging me awkwardly. I try not to cringe.

"I knew you could do it. So, how was it?"

The question sounds oddly girlish, and I hadn't expected her to ask me this sort of thing. "Um… I don't know. Nice, I guess."

She smiles. "You like him. I can tell. Who knows, maybe when this is all over, we can organize some sort of transfer for him."

"What do you mean? When what is all over?"

Jeanine seems caught off guard, as if she's revealed more than she meant. "Oh, nothing for you to worry about. The main thing is to keep you and Four safe. You can help me do that."

I nod. "Sure, Jeanine."

"And be sure to tell me if you have contact with any other Dauntless members?"

"Yes Jeanine. – actually, there was one other person"

"Who?"

"He didn't see me, but he was very curious about what Four and the others were up to. His name is Eric."

Jeanine seems concerned now. "Listen, Eric is very dangerous, very violent – completely unpredictable. "Did you know he was Erudite-born? Frankly, I was relieved when he chose Dauntless."

"Arnold told me."

"What else did he tell you?"

"Not much, just that he would be the next leader."

"Yes, I fear he will incite them to violence. How did the others act around him?"

"They don't like him."

"Really? That's a surprise. I would think he'd be their hero."

I know it's because they don't trust him, and Dauntless has never glorified violence for its own sake, but I shrug, not knowing how to explain it to Jeanine, and not really caring to.

"Get some sleep."

"Yes, Jeanine."

 **A/N As always, I appreciate your suggestions and comments. Reviews are like crack to me, truly. The next chapter is going to be partly from Uriah Pedrad's perspective, and should be very interesting.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	27. Chapter 27 Like Water For Chocolate

In my dreams that night I'm flying and when I wake up and find myself back in Erudite, it's as if someone has just thrown a bucket of water on me. At breakfast, Caleb and the others are chattering away. Thankfully, Linus is still carefully avoiding eye contact. After the events of the past few days, there's no way I can bring myself to pretend with him. I can't use him like that.

"Beatrice, have you heard a word I've said?" Amy queries me.

"I'm sorry, what?"

Amy giggles. "It's alright. It's not important."

"My sister has always had her head in the clouds, but she used to at least make _occasional_ visits back to earth." Caleb teases me.

For the first time in a while, I actually look at him, and I realize that something has changed. There are dark circles under his eyes, and a vertical crease in his brow. I never realized before how much he resembled my father.

"I'm sorry, I'm just a little tired." I apologize.

"Laura's lab just increased water synthesis efficiency by two and a half percent." It's clear Amy is happy for her. Laura raises herself slightly from her bench and makes a brief bow as Stephen, Linus, and Emma politely clap, and Amy whistles. Since the Fall, there has been no natural water, and so the factions all rely on Erudite's water production. It's rationed heavily in the other factions, and so I always saw it as a luxury. I realize that lately, as I've gone through the motions of my days in Erudite, I've felt like I was drowning in it.

"C'mon Beatrice, we'll be late for problem solving!" Amy grabs me by my arm and pulls me with her. I almost correct her, but stop myself from blurting out 'It's _Tris_ now'. She wouldn't understand. When I'm with Four, I'm Tris. _That's_ my real life - Erudite is just a dream.

After problem solving I decide to skip lunch and go see the Guardian. When I get there, this time I don't find him. I remember my father's brother, and decide to climb down to the bottom of the library. It takes much longer that I planned, and the staircases are winding and uneven. I think about what it must have taken to carve this library out of the stone and to store each of these books here. If Erudite were still that cradle of knowledge, perhaps I could have been happy here.

When I finally reach the bottom, I'm freezing – the temperature has dropped at least ten degrees. I hear a door close, and I jump.

"I'm sorry my dear, I didn't mean to frighten you." It's the Guardian. "I'm glad you've come, I've got something to show you. I have the feeling you may need it one day."

 _From Uriah Pedrad's perspective._

This is a nightmare. I don't know what's going on, but something is definitely up. It started this morning at 0600. Usually it's Eric and Shauna who train us. Eric is vicious and cruel, but Shauna is my older brother Zeke's girlfriend and she usually looks out for me and the rest of the initiates. She tells us that Eric will make us tougher. Today, though, instead of Shauna, it's Four. Four scares the crap out of me – even more than Eric. At least Eric is predictable, and we always know what he's thinking, even if we don't like it. Four is different. He's my brother Zeke's best friend, and even Zeke says he's a complete mystery. That doesn't seem to bother Zeke, but it's damn unnerving for me. Last time he trained us, he threw a knife at Al's head, and barely missed him. What's it going to be today?

Eric and Four seem to be arguing. Or rather, Eric is arguing and Four is attempting to ignore him.

"…C'mon Four, tell me."

"No."

"Why won't you tell me?"

"No."

"Is she _that_ ugly?"

Sigh. "No."

"Scared I'll steal her away from you?"

Four actually looks amused at this one. "No."

Eric is starting to get angry now. "Name."

"No."

"Alright then, Four – I know you're far too _stiff_ to stand by while I take it out on the initiates."

Four's eyes narrow, but he says nothing.

Eric addresses the initiates now. "Listen up everyone. Four is helping me train you all today, and he thinks you all need to work on your upper body strength. Uriah! Front and center."

I know why he picked me, but it doesn't matter. I hop to it. Eric's holding two barbells and he hands them to me.

"How many generations has your family been Dauntless?"

He already knows the answer. "Since the founding of the factions."

"Right, well, let's see if you've got what it takes. Kneel. Hold the weights straight out to at your sides. If those weights drop below ninety degrees, you're out. Factionless."

I do as I'm told, but before long I start to feel as if my shoulders are on fire. I can feel sweat running freely down my forehead, stinging my eyes. I clench my teeth. I pray for deliverance. Just when I think I can't take it a millisecond longer, Four speaks.

"What do you want, Eric?" Four asks quietly.

"Fight me."

"Once wasn't enough?"

"A lot's changed since we were initiates."

"Alright then. When?"

"Right here, right now"

"You got it."

Four seems oddly calm, but I assume it's because he knows he can win. He's probably the only person in Dauntless who could say that about Eric. Zeke says he's impossible to beat, that Four knows what his opponent is going to do, even before they do.

"Alright everyone, gather around. You're in for a treat. Four and I are going to give you a little demonstration." Eric removes his jacket and his shirt, Four leaves his shirt on. They both climb into the ring. They circle each other warily. For all his bravado, I can tell Eric is scared. He jabs at Four tentatively, but Four defects him easily. And then something strange happens. Eric steps in with an upper cut, and Four is just a half second too slow in blocking it. He follows it with a right cross that again, Four just barely misses blocking. I know something is up. I've seen my brother and Four spar a hundred times, and it never looked like this. Four throws a punch and hits Eric squarely in the jaw, but with nowhere near the power I know he's capable of. Eric spits out blood onto the floor, and grins. Then he launches himself at Four and knocks him onto the floor of the ring. He jumps on him, straddling him, and begins to punch him in the face, over and over again. Four manages to roll over onto his side, and Eric stands over him, kicking him again and again. Eerily, throughout this, Four makes no sound at all, he just lays there and takes it, barely moving. This only serves to enflame Eric further, though. Just as I'm starting to contemplate running for help, Zeke bursts in the training room and pulls Eric away.

"I'm glad you got to see this, Zeke. Now you know what the _legendary Four_ is really made of."

"That's right, I do!" shouts my brother. "And you can bet everyone here knows exactly what _you're_ made of now, too!"

Now Eric looks around the room, as if he's realizing we're here for the first time. I can see my own horror mirrored on the faces of the other initiates. Eric sees it, too.

"Take him to the infirmary, training will continue in one hour!" And with that Eric storms out.

Zeke goes to Four now, still lying motionless in the ring.

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I know how to take a beating."

"But why? I saw it all from the control room. You _let_ him win."

"He was never going to let it go. Now he'll leave me alone."

"He could have killed you."

Four grins up at his friend. "Nobody's managed it yet."

"C'mon I'll take you to the infirmary – I think you've got a couple of broken ribs."

"Just get me some water."

 **A/N Thank you so much for reading and please let me know what you think. I really appreciate the reviews.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	28. Chapter 28 Fight Club: Dauntless Style

When I got to the Watchers this afternoon, Arnold played me the footage of the fight between Eric and Four. Watching him adopt the same position as he had in his fear simulation tore at my heart. And I knew it was my fault. I had to pretend to be interested as Arnold explained to me how this incident would shift the balance of power in Eric's favor, though all the while, I was frantically scanning the monitors for signs of Four. Finally I found him, sitting upright on a hospital bed while Shauna bound his ribs and sutured his eyebrow. Zeke was with him, laughing and joking. My relief must have shown on my face.

I try to cover my interest. "Isn't that Zeke's girlfriend?" I ask.

"Yeah, when she's not training the initiates she works in the infirmary." I can't fool Arnold, though. "Sometimes I think you're in love with him."

"Which one?" I asked, feigning innocence.

Arnold raised his eyebrow and cocked his head to the side. "C'mon."

I laughed. "Don't be silly, I've never even met them!"

"Don't forget that," Arnold warned me. "You can't be objective if you develop feelings for your subjects."

 _Subjects_? I wanted to shout back at Arnold that the Dauntless are people, too, not animals in a zoo, but I knew it would only raise suspicion even further.

"You're right, Arnold. I'll be careful."

Tonight it's Zeke who helps me onto the train, and I worry for a split second that Four is more injured than it had appeared. Once I'm in the car, though, I'm relieved to find him, sitting with Shauna. I want to put my arms around him but I'm afraid I'll hurt him. I settle for taking his hand in mine.

"Oh c'mon, you can do better than that! You won't _believe_ what happened to him today."

I can see the fresh sutures over his eye and a bruise covering most of the left side of his face.

Four smiles. "Eric. It looks worse than it is."

"Was this because of me?" I ask.

"No. This has been coming for a long time."

"Yeah, Eric's had it in for him ever since Amar started calling him 'The Legendary Four', back when we were initiates". Zeke interjects.

"Legendary Four, huh? Now I _have_ to kiss you." Four smiles shyly as I lean forward and peck him on the lips. It's hard to pull myself away, but I do it.

"Where are we going?" Shauna asks.

"To a warehouse in the factionless section." Four answers. I raise an eyebrow, but he quickly shakes his head so I don't question him further, even though I'm surprised that he's taking me there again after saying it was unsafe.

"It's too bad this happened right before Samhain." Shauna says.

"What's Samhain?" I ask.

"It's just the night we Dauntless go _crazy_." Zeke replies, laughing.

"Though some of us are crazy all year round." Four jokes, nodding to his friend.

"It's a big celebration – it lasts all night. There's a bonfire, and we dance and sing, and drink, and, uh…" Shauna glances briefly at Zeke and winks. "You get the picture."

"Yeah, and everyone wears masks, so you could come!" shouts Zeke.

"Oh, yeah, Four – tell her to come!" Begs Shauna.

Four looks doubtful. "It's risky…"

"C'mon, everyone will be way too drunk to notice." Zeke pleads.

"I don't know…."

I realize that there is nothing I want more than to go to an all-night Dauntless party.

"Please…" I plead with Four.

He concedes. "Fine. But stay away from Eric. And you two better promise to help keep her safe."

Zeke and Shauna both raise their right hands in mock seriousness. "Dauntless Honor!" They yell in unison.

"You can thank me later, Four. You might actually have some fun this year." Zeke teases.

After we jump from the train, Four surprises me again by not blindfolding us. I wonder what's changed to make him less afraid, but I know I can't ask him now.

"So, what's the lesson for today?" I ask Four.

He opens up his backpack and pulls out two handfuls of knives. "You're going to learn how to throw these."

"Excellent! Maybe Tris can get him to tell us the secret of how he does it." Zeke exclaims.

Four tosses a marker to Zeke, who draws a bulls-eye on the wall.

"There's no secret. You're too impatient. It's all in how you breath."

"How I breath? What's _that_ got to do with it?"

"Watch this." Four reaches around me from behind and puts the knife in my hand. He gently pushes my hair of the way and whispers, "Close your eyes. Only in the stillness do I find my strength…" It is an Abnegation prayer, and it feels strange to be saying it now, especially with a knife in my hand, but I whisper it with him, and gradually our breathing slows and synchronizes. "… I allow it to pass through me…"

"Now throw the knife."

I do as he says, and hear a resounding 'thunk' as the knife hits the wall. Shauna gasps, and Zeke whistles. "What the…? You two are scary!" Zeke cries.

I open my eyes and see the knife lodged in the center of the target.

I laugh. "Beginner's luck."

"C'mon Four, come whisper in my ear and I bet I'll hit the target, too," teases Zeke.

"You're unteachable. It takes complete mental silence."

"Well we both know that ain't never gonna happen!"

"Exactly." Four grins.

Zeke draws two more bulls-eyes and we start practicing. I hit the target several more times, and Shauna improves. Zeke is hopeless, though, and quickly grows bored.

"C'mon, let's do some real fighting!" Zeke yells.

"Alright." Answers Four.

With that, Shauna and I pair off and Zeke and Four go at it.

"Don't worry, I'll be gentle," Shauna tells me. "Four would kill me if I hurt you."

She thinks I'm weak, and it sends a flash of anger through me. I advance on her and deliver a quick right jab, right to her nose. Shauna steps back, stunned, and I instantly feel regret.

To my relief, though, she laughs. "I see Four taught you the first lesson?".

I grin. "Yeah, hit first and hit hard."

"Well, you better hope he taught you the second lesson just as well." And with that we start sparring in earnest. Shauna has the edge, but I'm able to hold my own. Just as I start to wonder if perhaps she's holding back, she lands a powerful kick straight to my stomach, and I go down.

"You forgot lesson number three," Shauna tells me.

I grimace and pull myself into a sitting position. "We didn't get to that one."

"What happened?"

I smile, remembering our kiss in the doorway. "Uh… we got distracted."

Shauna laughs out loud at this. "I bet you did. C'mon let's take a break."

Zeke and Four are still sparring. I can't believe Four's still able to fight after what happened this morning, but I notice they're careful not to make contact. They're stopping their blows just short each other, like Four had done with me. I remember Four's warning not to get used to holding back.

"Do they usually fight like this?" I ask Shauna.

"Nah, this is just for fun. You should watch, though – Zeke and Four are the best fighters in Dauntless."

I follow her advice and watch them as they spar. It's amazing, as they use the entire space while they kick, punch, and block each other. It's more like a dance than a fight. Zeke is explosive, Four is almost cat-like, but they complement each other. At one point, just as it seems like Four has him cornered, Zeke runs up the wall and flips back over, landing behind Four and securing him in a headlock.

Four is impressed. "Nice one Zeke, I'm glad you're on my side."

"Always, my friend." Zeke reaches his hand out and he and Four clasp hands in a Dauntless handshake, elbows bent, fists pointing upward. Zeke reaches his other arm around Four's shoulder and hugs him. "I love you, man." Four returns the embrace.

Gasping and sweaty, they join us. Shauna leans over and kisses Zeke passionately. I hand Four the canteen. I realize that sitting here among Four and his friends -no, _our_ friends, I've never been happier in my life.

"Now Four, maybe you could explain to us why you decided to be Eric's punching bag today?" Zeke begins.

"If I'd won, he'd have taken it out on the initiates – to prove himself, and he'd have probably found a way to slit my throat in my sleep."

Zeke is quieted by this. "Yeah, I suppose you're right. But what about your _pride_?"

I know the answer to this before Four says it. "Pride never leads you anywhere good." It's an Abnegation teaching. "Besides," Four continues, glancing toward me. "Lately I've enjoyed being alive."

Shauna yawns and stretches. "We'd better get going, I've got training at 0600."

"But I owe you two more shifts…" Four counters.

"No way, Four, I can't send you back there."

"Thanks Shauna, I'll make it up to you."

"No need."

"Do you want me to show you the way back?" Four asks. Shauna nods yes, but Zeke digs her in the ribs.

"We'll be fine." Zeke assures him.

"See you tomorrow night, Tris. "I'll bring you some nice clothes."

I worry briefly about what 'nice clothes' means in Dauntless, but I just smile back.

"Good night!"

Now that we're alone, I feel strangely shy with him, and we end up just gazing at each other.

"You never asked me what happened with my mother," Four begins. "I went to meet with her, and we had a long talk. She showed me her headquarters. It's unbelievable. They have an entire hospital, fully staffed and better even than the one in Dauntless. They have schools – everything. She told me that she was Divergent, and had starting making plans to leave and join the factionless. That's how she met Jason, her… lover. She hadn't meant to fall in love, but it just happened. He was Divergent, too, so she left to protect herself and the baby. It all makes sense now."

"But she left you with Marcus."

"She didn't realize I was Divergent. Nobody did. She thought I'd be safer in Abnegation."

"What happened to the baby?"

"It was a boy, but he died soon after Jason was killed."

"How?"

"She didn't say."

"How did Jason die?"

"She thinks Marcus had him killed."

"Did you tell her you were Divergent?"

Four looks away. "No."

"So you still don't trust her?"

"Not completely. But listen, war is coming. We both know it. If we joined her - we could be together, at least."

As wonderful as that sounds, I know it's not that simple. "But you heard her – she hates me."

"She's sorry for what she said to you. It's been a hard life for her."

"Did you tell her who I really was?" I ask.

"No."

"It's been a hard life for you, too – hasn't it?"

He shrugs. "I just don't see any other way…"

"I don't trust her, Four."

"Just think about it." He takes my hand and presses it to his lips. Then he pulls me closer and kisses me. It is so tender and sweet that I feel as if my heart will burst. I know he's using the kiss to convince me, but I don't care.

 **A/N As always, I appreciate your suggestions and comments. Reviews are like crack to me, truly. It's probably only fair to warn you: things are going to get a bit dark soon. BTW, a couple of reviewers have been wondering about whether Jeanine is 'good' or 'bad'. Let me just say that that's probably not a useful way to look at any of these characters. Besides, just because someone is 'good' doesn't mean that won't end up doing something with terrible consequences, right?**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	29. Chapter 29 Oiche Shamhna

_From Four's Perspective._

The mood in Dauntless is definitely different today, or maybe it's just me. As I walk to the cafeteria for an early breakfast, I cut through the Pire. Most mornings it's deserted, with the exception of a few stragglers sleeping off the previous night's excesses. Not today though. The glass-windowed ceiling has been opened, letting in the cool Autumn air, and crews are already stacking fuel for the bonfire, and kegs full of liquor.

I see Eric, checking off items on a clipboard as the kegs are delivered. It's odd for him to have taken on such a menial task but I don't care to investigate, he's the last person I want to see. I slip down a nearby hallway and take an alternate route to avoid him. It's something I've become pretty good at over the past two years.

In the cafeteria, I grab some muffins and coffee and then head to the control room. When I get there, I'm shocked to find Zeke there ahead of me. It's probably the only time he's every gotten to work on time, and definitely the first time he's beaten me. I toss him a muffin.

"Thanks, man."

"What's going on? You're here early."

"Couldn't sleep. Too excited."

I grin, wishing I could be as carefree as my friend. Like always, he takes the left-hand screens, and I take the right. At least what's on them today is interesting. Usually I have to rely on Zeke's chatter for entertainment.

"Ooh look, there's Shauna!" laughs Zeke, as he zooms in on one of the screens.

I glance over and see an image of Shauna walking into one the clothing stores bordering the Pire.

"You're not supposed to be spying on people you know, Zeke."

"This isn't spying, she's in a public place."

Shauna is talking animatedly with another woman in the store.

"I wonder what they're talking about." Muses Zeke.

"Clothes, probably." I mutter dryly.

I look more closely though and realize that Shauna has her hand at her shoulder, at about Tris' height, and then holds out both arms together, demonstrating Tris' smaller frame.

"Four, I think she's buying clothes for Tris."

I nod, but am concerned about what she might buy. "I probably should have told her that Tris was Abnegation-born."

Zeke raises an eyebrow. "So _that's_ how you met. I've been trying to figure it out."

"Actually, it's not. I found her watching us play Capture the Flag."

"Hold up. What? You found a stray Erudite girl spying on you? Girl or no, I'd have put my knife to her throat and told her she had some explaining to do."

"It might amuse you to know that's exactly what I did."

Zeke tilts his head to one side. "Really? So how in the world did you end up… you know…"

"It's hard to explain."

Zeke giggles. "And they say you have no charm. It ain't hard to explain, Four. It's _love._ Cupid shoots his arrow and _bam_! It's all over."

I shake my head, but can't completely erase my grin.

Zeke continues. "Seriously, Four. You love her. You do. You have to _tell_ her."

"It's not that simple."

"It would be if you were both factionless."

I'm shocked to hear him say out loud the thoughts that have been occupying my mind nearly constantly over the past few days. "It would be a hard life for her."

Zeke rolls his eyes. "Look, my father died ten years ago and since then my mother's told Uriah and me every chance she gets that nothing is more important than love – that she wishes she'd realized it before he was gone. Don't let this go, Four. Do what you have to do. I see the way Tris looks at you."

"How?" My voice is practically a whisper.

"The same way you look at her, man. The _same_ way."

I don't know what to say to this. 'We should get back to work, Zeke."

 _From Tris' Perspective_

Dinner is almost over in Erudite and I am restless and on edge. In just a few minutes, I'll be headed to Samhain with Four and the others. This is the first night I'll be the real me – In Dauntless, dressed in Dauntless clothes, and celebrating with Four and the others. I leap from my bench the minute it's over and start walking quickly down the hall, toward the atrium. I hear Caleb's voice behind me, calling.

"Beatrice, wait up."

I almost don't answer to the name, but he is persistent.

"Caleb, I'm in a bit of a hurry, what do you need."

I see hurt shadow his face briefly. "Where are you going?"

I sigh, too impatiently. "It's for Jeanine."

"Beatrice, I _really_ need to talk to you."

"I'm sorry Caleb, I can't be late."

"There are some things going on." He lowers his voice. "I really need to talk to you."

"I promise we'll talk tomorrow, OK?"

He seems unsatisfied, but he accepts it.

"OK, tomorrow."

With that, I race off, my mind filled only with thoughts of Dauntless.

When I jump on the train, they're waiting for me. Zeke and Shauna are already in their masks, but I recognize them easily from their hair and clothing. Before I get a chance to say anything to Four, Shauna grabs me and almost drags me into the next car. She tosses a bag at me.

I open it and find leather pants and a thin, black tank top. I'm nervous about being so exposed but I get the sense that she went to a lot of trouble, so I smile.

"Thanks, Shauna."

"You're going to look great. Put them on."

I do as she says, fighting my Abnegation modesty. Next she pulls out a mask, and ties it around my head. It's black, with licks of red flame painted around the eyes. I can see my reflection in the metal rim of the doorway, and I barely recognize myself. I like the way I look, ,though. I take a deep breath. She claps her hands.

" _Now_ you're Dauntless."

 _From Four's Perspective._

We're almost to Dauntless when Shauna brings Tris back to our train car. I am astonished by her transformation. As I stare at her I realize that in her Dauntless clothes, she looks _more_ like herself to me, not less. She is beautiful, every curve of her.

"So what do you think?" Shauna asks.

I don't know what to say, so like always, I default to Abnegation, and worry that Tris might be feeling too exposed. "Do you want my jacket?"

"No thanks," Tris' voice is bold. "It's a warm night."

With that, we jump, and carefully approach Dauntless, avoiding all the camera placements. Once inside, I see the celebration is in full swing. Nobody notices us, and I start to think I had been worried for nothing. Zeke brings us all beer, but Tris shakes her head no and I need to keep sharp in case I need to get her out of the building in a hurry.

"C'mon, let's dance!" shouts Shauna over the loud drum music that fills the Pire. I start to say no, but Tris grabs my hand and pulls me toward the bonfire. I'm not sure if it's the fire or Tris' presence but pretty soon I'm taking my jacket off. I roll it into a ball and toss it toward the wall. I catch Tris' eyes and they are sparkling at me. She takes both my arms and places them on her hips, then she stands on her toes to kiss me. All around us, the Dauntless are laughing, and dancing, and drinking, and my head is spinning, as if I'm drunk off the atmosphere itself. All I can see is Tris, and all I can feel is how amazing it is to be here with her, in front of everybody, free. I scan the crowd, on the lookout for Eric, but there's no sign of him. I spot Zeke and Shauna, farther away now. They are dancing slowly, very close to each other, and she is pulling his shirt off him, over his head. Tris sees them too, and tugs mischievously at the hem of my shirt. I remember the last time this happened, and my heart starts to race. Still, I can't say no, and I allow her to lift it off. Someone that I think is one of the initiates - Christina?, notices me. "Don't stop there, baby, take it _all_ off. I blush under my mask, and am about to reprimand her, but then I remember it's Samhain, and anything goes. Tris takes my chin and focuses my attention back on her as we start to dance. She puts the palms of both hands flat on my chest, and I fight to catch my breath. We stay like that for a long time, and I can't believe it. It's like tonight is the first night of my life that I'm truly _alive,_ and I know it's all because of her. Then I see Eric. Fear brings me back to my senses and I pull Tris into a poorly-lit hallway, hoping that we escaped notice.

"That was close." I tell her, trying to catch my breath.

"I want to see where you live. Show me?" She asks. This makes me nervous, but I decide it's safer than being out where everyone can see us. I lead her along the dimly lit hallway to my apartment, and open the door for her. It's small, just a bedroom and a kitchen. I don't use the kitchen, there's nothing but water in the refrigerator. We take off our masks. My bed is unmade - black sheets, a single pillow and a gray quilt. She looks around, taking it all in. I realize that there's no place to sit but my bed. I motion her toward it, and I sit down, facing her, hugging my knees to my chest. I follow her eyes around the room, wondering what she must be thinking. Spray painted in foot-tall letters on the wall are the words 'Fear God Alone'.

"Did you paint that?"

I nod. "Abnegation habits die hard, I guess."

As soon as the words are out of my mouth, I realize we've both become self-conscious. Me shirtless, and her showing far more skin than she would ordinarily, even in Erudite.

"Do you want a sweater?" I ask.

"No," she smiles at me, biting her lip. "I want you." She takes my hand and pulls me toward her.

"You're amazing, do you know that?" I tell her. "So brave."

"No." she whispers. "Just fearless."

Our mouths crash against each other. She wraps her arms around me and the feeling of her skin against mine is unbelievable. I never want to let her go. I look into her eyes - searching, asking. My hands find the small of her back, underneath her shirt. "Undress me." She whispers. I comply, and pull her shirt over her head. I remember Zeke's words to me earlier, and suddenly I'm not afraid. "I love you, Tris." I tell her. She laughs and falls back onto my bed, cradled in my arms. I sense we are nearing a point of no return, when suddenly, from nowhere, a loud explosion rips through Dauntless.

 **A/N Perhaps not the bang you were hoping for, huh? Sorry about that. As always, I appreciate your suggestions and comments. Put your seatbelt on now. As you might imagine, it's going to get a bit bumpy from here on out.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	30. Chapter 30 Cry Havoc

_From Four's Perspective_

My ears are still ringing from the blast and I can't hear what Tris is trying to say to me. I find a shirt and jacket and quickly put them on. I toss her a sweater and she does the same. I help her tie her mask back on, and then her hand and lead her out of the apartment. Along with the rest of Dauntless, we run back down the hallway toward the Pire. Confusion is everywhere. Many are already armed with guns, but I have only my knife, and I silently curse my stupidity. When we arrive, Max and Eric are already on the Balcony overlooking the site of the bonfire. Part of the outer wall has been ripped away by the bomb, and medics are carrying away victims on stretchers.

The crowd grows by the second. I can feel anger radiating off of everyone around us. I pull Tris closer to me to shield her from it. I terrified of what they would do to her if they found out she was an outsider. Max raises his arms to silence everyone, and begins to shout.

"We have been attacked – unprovoked, at our own headquarters, on Samhain, when our enemy thought we would have our guard down. There is only one way to answer such an attack."

All around us, the Dauntless are throwing up their fists, pounding on the rails and shouting.

Max raises his arms again, to quiet them. It takes a while. "Do you want to know who attacked us? Let me show you!" With that, Max points to the large video screen hanging in the Pire. The footage is grainy but unmistakable. A man and a woman are shown sneaking into Dauntless, carrying a large back between them. Then the view is switched to show them planting the bomb in one of the Pire shops, while all around them, the Dauntless dance and revel. Finally, in the last view, we see them fleeing, heads, down, casting nervous glances over their shoulders. They are dressed in the clothes of Abnegation, but I don't recognize either of them. I look to Tris, and I can see in her eyes that she, too, does not recognize them. Around me I hear muttered comments. "… stiffs", "They won't get away with this.."

Again, Max quiets them. "I know what you're thinking. But don't be surprised that it was the Abnegation. I'm not. I've seen this day coming for a long time. The Abnegation have been playing with fire. They have been harboring Divergents. Why would they do this? Why would they give shelter to the animals that caused the Fall - who brought us to the brink of extinction? The Abnegation preach humility, but it is _false_ humility. The truth is, they are the most arrogant of all, thinking they could contain the Divergents, allowing them to _breed_ like cockroaches, and hiding it from us. If those _stiffs_ had ever done a real day's work in their lives, they'd know that you reap what you sow!"

The Dauntless erupt into angry cries once more. Tris and I are surrounded by people yelling "Kill them all", "Exterminate them", and "Revenge". I am terrified for Tris' safety, and I scan the room for a way to get her out of here, but I see no opening anywhere.

Max continues. "We are going to solve our Divergent problem once and for all. We are going to march into Abnegation and kill them. All of them. Hear me now, if they are wearing gray, they are your enemy. We will kill them all. We will teach them what happens when you play with fire. When you play with fire, YOU GET BURNED!"

With that, the Pire erupts in war cries. The mood around me is one of extreme agitation, but I notice that besides me and Tris, there is one other person in the room who seems totally calm: Eric. He is standing next to Max, and slight behind, and he is quietly surveying the crowd, almost casually. I wonder if he has something to do with all of this, but I don't have time to puzzle it out, and I'm afraid he'll see Tris.

Down at the bottom, there are rows of Dauntless, handing out assault rifles, and the angry crowd quickly arms itself and starts to empty out of the Pire, through the hole made by the bomb. I grab her by the waist. "C'mon, we have to get you out of here _now_."

We weave our way through the crowd, it's almost dawn and I know we don't have much time. Tris stops me once we get outside.

"I want to go with you." Tris tells me.

"No way. It's too dangerous."

"I can't leave you like this." She cries.

I turn back to her. She is frantic.

I try to calm her. "I know. But you'll be safer in Erudite."

"Then do something for me?"

"Anything."

"Find my parents? Keep them safe?"

I know this will be difficult – maybe impossible, but I also know that she won't go back to Erudite unless she's sure they'll be safe, and I have to get her back there.

"OK. Can you get to the warehouse by yourself – do you remember the way?"

"Yes."

"I'll find them and take them there. Come tonight after nightfall."

She reaches up and kisses me quickly. "Stay safe."

"Wait, is there something you can give me that they'll recognize – so they'll know they can trust me?"

Tris looks down and realizes she is still wearing her Dauntless clothes, and has nothing from her old life.

"Give me your knife."

"What?"

"My hair, they'll recognize my hair."

I hand her my knife and she quickly cuts a lock of her hair, tying it together with the ribbon from her mask. I put it in the top pocket of my jacket. I can hear the train coming now and I lead her toward it. One last time, I kiss her, making sure to memorize the feel of her, the way she tastes. Reluctantly, I pull away.

"Go. Go _now_. Don't look back."

She runs for the train and leaps onboard, and I watch her disappear inside.

 **A/N As always, I appreciate your suggestions and comments. Reviews are like crack. I am working hard to finish this up, so stay tuned. Thanks for reading.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	31. Chapter 31 The Voice of Reason

I thought leaving my parents on Choosing Day would be the hardest goodbye I'd ever have to make. I was wrong. Leaving Abnegation was leaving safety behind. Leaving Four was like leaving behind a piece of my soul. I feel his absence, viscerally. I tell myself that I will see him tonight. I will see him, and my parents. For the first time since I left Abnegation, I say a prayer for my family, and for Four.

When I get to Erudite, the atrium is filled with people, running here and there. Nobody notices me, even though I am still dressed in my Dauntless clothes and Four's sweater. I slip down the hallway and quickly walk to my room. Amy is there, and I can tell my appearance shocks her.

"Beatrice! What are you doing dressed like that?"

There's no time to explain though, as the intercom beeps, and the screens in our rooms direct us to assemble in the Great Hall. I quickly throw on my Erudite dress, pausing to hide my Dauntless clothes in the bottom of my closet.

"Something terrible has happened in Dauntless." I tell Amy.

"How do you know?"

I shake my head. "I can't explain. C'mon, let's go."

Most of Erudite is already there when we arrive. We quickly find our friends and take a seat. Jeanine ascends the dais, looking as though she hasn't slept all night. She stands at the podium, taking in the scene around her, and then raises her hand to silence the crowd.

"Citizens of Erudite, in the early hours of this morning, an attack took place on Dauntless headquarters, during their Samhain celebration. A bomb was set off, killing 5 citizens, including a child. Two assailants, dressed in grey, were seen fleeing."

As in Dauntless, the room erupts in murmurings, though they are considerably more restrained. My brother and I lock eyes, but he quickly looks away.

Jeanine continues. "We now believe that this is the work of Divergents. We have long suspected that Abnegation was sheltering these dangerous aberrations, and now we have conclusive proof. The Dauntless, understandably, are marching on Abnegation as we speak, and have vowed to exact vengeance. We, as the stewards of knowledge and wisdom, recognize that peace will always be a better option than war. We are hoping to prevail upom the Dauntless leadership, and to convince them to spare as many _innocent_ Abnegation lives as possible. Our greatest priority, however, must be to prevent the bloodshed from spilling over into the other factions. Our City is fragile, and must be preserved at all costs. We will keep you informed of any developments throughout the next few hours and days. For now, I would ask that you go about your daily routines as best as you can, but for your own safety, no one will be allowed to leave our Headquarters. That is all."

The Great Hall is filled with nervous chatter, the sounds of nervous Erudite echoing off the cavernous walls and ceiling. I find my brother.

"You wanted to talk?"

He shakes he head. "It doesn't matter any more."

"What do you mean? Aren't you worried about our parents?"

"I have work to do."

I press him further. "After dinner, then?"

"I'll be in my lab all night, working."

"I'll come to you, then – where's your lab?"

Caleb shakes his head. "You don't understand. It's too late, now."

With that, Caleb disappears in the crowd, but Amy is nearby and hears the exchange. "He's been under a lot of stress lately. Go see him after dinner, his lab is on level 14, room 6B." She smiles at me and then runs after him.

I head to the Watchers. When I get there Arnold looks me over, speculatively.

"You look like you haven't slept all night." He says.

It's true, of course, but I know I can't tell him where I've been. "I'm worried about my parents in Abnegation."

"You should be. You missed the excitement over in Dauntless last night."

"Excitement? Is that what you call it? People were killed, Arnold."

"I know that. I saw the bodies. It was a hell of a party beforehand, though. By the way, it looks your friend Four finally had some luck with the ladies."

I don't understand why Arnold would still be interested in this now, but I play along.

"Oh?"

"Yeah, take a look." He pulls up footage of Four and me, dancing and kissing by the bonfire.

"Hmmm, she's got blond hair – is that Nikki?" I say, as casually as possible.

"No, definitely not Nikki, not tall enough. I'd say this girl is more your height – give or take."

"So who is it, then?"

"It's funny, even with the mask, we should be able to identify her based on her height, body composition, and mannerisms. But we can't. She's not in any of our databases. It's like she appeared out of thin air."

I need to divert Arnold, _fast._ "So do you have footage of the people planting the bomb?

"I do. We're still trying to piece it all together, though. There are some things that don't quite add up."

"Like what?" I ask.

Arnold never gets a chance to answer, though. Just then, the intercom chirps. It's Jeanine, summoning me to her office.

In the elevator, I try to collect my thoughts, I know I have to prepare myself mentally, but everything is happening so fast. I try the prayer that Four had reminded me of, and it calms me somewhat. When I arrive, there are several others in the office – people I don't recognize, but she ushers them all out. Despite the turmoil, Jeanine appears oddly exhilarated, rather than overwhelmed. I suppose it's a trait that's necessary in a good leader.

"Beatrice, we need your help."

"Of course Jeanine, anything."

She smiles. "Good. It turns out the work you've been doing with Four is more important than we had imagined. I need you to bring him here."

I remember Four's words about Jeanine. "I – I don't think he would come. They don't trust the Erudite."

"Yes, but he trusts _you_. And everything has changed now. The Dauntless are refusing to even communicate with us. Four is our only hope. We need to talk to him, to get him to convince the Dauntless leadership to stand down. We need an ambassador."

"I don't know…"

"Beatrice, you have to _persuade_ him. Our City is fragile. You and he could be the key to restoring the peace." She pauses, putting her hand on my shoulder. "If this works, I promise you I will make it so you and he can be together."

I know that now more than ever, with so much anger directed at the Divergents, I need to appear loyal. "He's just a boy, Jeanine – I would never betray Erudite."

"But you could be together _here_ , I mean."

"I thought the faction system was inviolable?"

"Beatrice, Erudite controls the water supply for the City. The rules are what _we_ say they are."

I should be shocked at her ruthlessness, but all I can think of is Four and me together. I hope I can convince him that this is a better option than joining his mother.

"I'm supposed to meet him tonight."

"Good, bring him here as quickly as you can."

"What if he won't come?"

"Beatrice, look at me. You're my cousin. Faction _and_ blood. I swear to you that he will come to no harm. If _you_ believe me. _He'll_ believe me."

"I believe you."

 **A/N Since the last one was so short, I figured I should give you another. As always, I appreciate your suggestions and comments. Thanks for reading.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	32. Chapter 32 Nunc Scio Quid Sit Amor

_From Four's Perspective_

I march with the Dauntless into Abnegation. The experience of walking through Abnegation, in my black clothes and with my assault rifle loaded, is surreal. Familiar, and bizarrely unfamiliar, at the same time. Eric and a small cadre of soldiers have some sort of rapid divergence test and they go house to house, testing the occupants. I can see that they've found a few Divergents - they are under armed guard in a clearing. None of them are the people who attached Dauntless, though. I don't see Marcus anywhere. They seem to be killing the rest of the Abnegation. All around me, the Abnegation allow themselves to be herded to their deaths, like lambs to the slaughter. Part of me despises them for it, but I instantly feel a pang of guilt as I think of Tris' parents. I find their house, it was close to mine, or I should say, Marcus'. I carefully ease the door open with the butt of my rifle. The house appears empty. I climb the stairs to the second floor. I slowly go through each room, opening closets, and looking under beds. There is no sign of them. I'm about to walk back downstairs when I remember there is another closet, in the hallway. How could I have forgotten? I walk back toward it, and throw the door open. At exactly that moment, Tris' mother lunges out at me, a kitchen knife in her hand. She comes within centimeters of my throat, but I am able to grab her wrist and twist it around her back, forcing her to drop it. She raises her hands in surrender, but her anger turns to confusion as I raise my finger to my lips to urge silence.

Andrew is behind her. "Who are you? He questions me.

I can see that Natalie has already figured it out, though. She peers at me. "Tobias…?"

"It's Four now." I tell her, more curtly than I had intended. There's no time to explain, so I yank open my pocket and pull Tris' lock of hair out and show it to them. "Beatrice sent me. I have to get you out of here."

I see anger flash across Andrew's face. "Why do you have my daughter's hair?" He demands.

"She gave it to me. So you would trust me."

"You're really Marcus' son?" He searches my face.

I don't have time to answer, though, because downstairs I hear the door open. We all freeze.

"I could have sworn I saw Four come in here." It's Eric's.

Natalie, thinking quickly, pulls Andrew and me into the closet, and silently shuts the door. I start to hyperventilate. All of the Abnegation houses are the same, and this is the closet my father used to lock me in as boy, after he'd finished beating me. I start to mouth the Stillness prayer, and I can sense, rather than hear, Andrew and Natalie do the same.

We hear footsteps on the stairs. We hold our breath, collectively.

"I don't see him. All these houses look the same. Try the next one."

We let out a collective sigh of relief, but don't dare move until several minutes after he's left. I open the closet door and take several rapid breaths. Then I turn to them. "Look, the only way this works is if I pretend you're my prisoners. I have a safe place I can take you to. But you have to trust me."

Natalie nods immediately, but Andrew is more wary of me. "How can we be sure?"

"You can't." I level with him. But I'm you're only chance. They're going to kill you all."

Natalie takes Andrew's arm. "Let's go."

I march them out of the house and down the path. Thankfully, nobody questions me as we near the clearing where the Divergents are being held. At the last moment, I break and cut down a narrow alley. They follow me. For once, I'm thankful that the Abnegation sector is the one closest to the factionless. It's still a long walk to the warehouse, but after an hour or so, we are there.

I open the door, and show them inside, then I bolt the door from the inside. We sit on the floor across from each other for a moment, in silence.

Finally Natalie speaks. "I suppose you should tell us what's going on… Four."

"I don't know. A bomb went off last night in Dauntless, and they think it was put there by Divergents who were hiding among the Abnegation."

"We _know_ that." Interrupts Andrew. "I want to know what you're doing with my daughter's hair."

I take a deep breath, not knowing where to start. "I found her, one night, watching us play Capture the Flag at the Navy Pier."

"What was she doing there?"

"Escaping Erudite. She went there to be with Caleb, but…"

"And then what?" demands Andrew.

"We… became friends."

"Where is she now?"

"Back in Erudite. She's going to meet us tonight."

"You've brought her here before, to this place?"

"Yes."

Natalie interrupts. "These are questions that can be asked later. He just saved our lives."

At this, Andrew's face softens. "My wife is right, of course. Thank you, Tobias."

I nod, and don't correct him.

"Do you have another gun?" Natalie asks me.

"Just a pistol – why?"

"I'm going back with you, we have to try and save as many as we can."

I can see now that Tris is her mother's daughter.

"No – you can't. I promised Tris I'd keep you safe."

"Tris?" Queries her father, but Natalie raises her hand to silence him.

"You know our code, even though you've chosen to follow another. I know how to use a gun. I have to go back. Unless of course you plan to keep us here by force." She raises her eyebrow, and knows she's cornered me.

"I promised her." I tell her, handing her my pistol. "Stay here, stay safe, and I will go back and save as many I can."

Natalie and Andrew look at each other, and Andrew nods.

"Alright." He tells me as I rise to my feet, "We'll pray for you."

For some reason I find myself wondering what my life would have been like if I'd had parents like Tris'. I quickly shake the thought from my head, though. I have work to do.

When I arrive back at Abnegation, I realize immediately that it is already over. An eery silence hangs over the district, and there is nothing but empty houses and dead bodies along the pathways. I recognize some of them, but I look away. I don't know why, but something draws me toward Marcus' house – _my_ house. It is empty like all the others. I climb the stairs to my old room, and stand in the center of it. My schoolbooks are still arranged in a neat pile on my desk, exactly as I left them two years ago, the bed is neatly made, and there is no dust anywhere. Everything looks so much smaller than I remember. I don't belong here, anymore. It's getting late and I should get back. I have no idea how I'll tell Natalie and Andrew what I've seen.

The sun is setting as I round the corner onto the street where the warehouse sits. I don't know why, but I instantly know something is wrong. When I get there, the door is wide open. The smell hits me first – thick and metallic. Then I see the blood. Andrew has a single gunshot wound to his chest, but Natalie has numerous bullet and knife wounds, including defensive wounds to her hands, forearms, chest, and face. I check her pistol, every round is spent. At least she went down fighting.

I fight to catch my breath, as a sob escape me. I know it's wrong to cry, but I can't stop myself. I cry from guilt, I cry for them, for Abnegation, and most of all, for Tris. Slowly I come to my senses. I crawl on my knees to the wall and sit with my back to it, my knees to my chest, and my rifle in my hands. There's nothing for me to do now but wait for Tris.

I don't have to wait long. I hear her footsteps on the pockmarked street and I steel myself. She stands in the doorway, peering in. I can tell she's wondering what's going on, but I can't bring myself to speak. I see her run to her parents' bodies and crouch over them. I can see her shaking. She's crying, but like a true Abnegation, she makes no sound. This lasts for what feels like hours, but may have been only minutes. I can't tell.

I crawl to her. Somehow I find my voice. "I'm sorry."

She looks at me, her eyes wild with grief. "Who did this? How did you let this happen?" She is screaming now, grabbing my shoulders and shaking me.

"I went to Abnegation and found them. I brought them back here, but then your mother insisted on going back to try to save some of the others. The only way I could get her to agree to stay was to promise to go back, myself. But there was nobody left alive in Abnegation. I left her my pistol. She fired every round. She put up a fight, at least."

"But who did this?"

I had been so focused on how Tris would react, I had completely failed to realize that we might still be in danger. An unforgiveable lapse. "I don't know. Factionless, maybe? We should get out of here. But I don't know anywhere that's safe anymore."

Tris wipes her tears away with the heel of her palm. "I do. I need you to come with me."

"Where?"

"Erudite. Jeanine told me to bring you back there with me. Tonight. She wants you to act as a liaison to Dauntless – to stop the violence."

"I don't trust her."

"Four, she said if you did this, we could be together."

"It's a trap."

"She swore to me, faction _and_ blood. What reason would she have to hurt you?"

"Tris, we're Divergent, we can't trust her. We can't trust _anyone._ "

She's on her knees now, in front of me. Her hands are clasped together. "Four, _please_." She whispers. "I have no one now. _No one._ I can't lose you, too. Please do this for me. It's the only way."

I look into her eyes, pleading with me over the bodies of her dead parents, people I should have been able to save, and I know I can't say no to her.

"Alright." I capitulate.

"Thank you." She whispers, pressing her lips to my hand. I pull her into my lap and she stays there for a long time, crying.

When they subside, she looks up at me. "We should get going," I tell her.

"Yes."

She bends once more over the bodies of her parents, saying a prayer. She carefully removes her mother's shawl and folds it into her backpack. We walk out together, hand in hand.

 **A/N And so the die is cast, as they say. As always, I appreciate your suggestions and comments. Thanks for reading. The title is a quote from Virgil. It means "Now I know what love is." It means a lot of things for Four. In one way, it refers to the love Tris has for her parents, and they for her – even Andrew's concern – he's all "why the #$ & do you have my daughter's hair, and probably pretty accurately surmises what their relationship is, and isn't happy about it. Four never had that. It also refers to the love Four has for Tris, that he's willing to follow her into what he thinks may be a trap. Why? Because she asked him too. It's that simple, and that horrible. Now you know what love is, too. Hey, cheer up, it ****_might_** **work out, right?**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	33. Chapter 33 My Brother's Keeper

I feel empty, hollowed by my parents' death, as Four and I enter Erudite, still hand in hand. No one is there to challenge his presence. We ride the elevator to Jeanine's office in silence.

The door opens, we step out, and in that precise moment, it hits me. My mind is reeling, but with sickening clarity, I see exactly what I've done. One glance at Four tells me he knows it, too. His face registers not shock, but resignation. I've betrayed him.

Jeanine is not alone in her office. Marcus is there, tied to a chair, his face and shirt bloody. Eric is there, and has been torturing him. There are Erudite guards there as well, and before either of us can react, they put a hypodermic needle to Four's neck and his body sags. They drag him to a second chair, and begin tying him to it. Arnold is there, too, but I can't figure out why.

"Ah, Beatrice. Right on time. And you've done your job so beautifully. We've had trouble getting Marcus to tell us the location of the rest of the Divergents, but I'm sure Tobias will be just the leverage we need."

Jeanine walks over to me, and smooths my hair with her hands. I can tell she's trying to read me. She whispers to me, not wanting the others to overhear. "I'm sorry cousin, but it was necessary. We won't hurt him. The safety of the entire City depends on us getting this information from Marcus. After it's over, I promise I'll release him, and he can join us if he wants."

I have only a split second to decide how to act. I will have one chance only, to help him.

I take a deep breath. "It's OK, I understand. And Four will understand too - he has no love for his father. But I don't want to watch. Is that OK?"

Jeanine nods. "Go get some rest."

I turn and walk toward the elevator, struggling not to collapse under the weight of my guilt and terror. Eric will kill Four, I know it – and Jeanine will let him. Just before the doors close, I hear him taunting Four. "So your little girlfriend was one of ours, huh? That figures."

Everything is spinning, but I cannot collapse. I _cannot_ collapse. I knew I couldn't save Four by myself, and the only way I could get help would be if Jeanine thought I was on her side. Still, I hate myself for leaving him.

I have one ally in Erudite and I go to him now. I quickly make my way to my brother's lab. When I open the door, immediately I hear the cries of someone in agony. There is a man, strapped to a table. There is an IV line in his arm, and wires protruding from his scalp, as if they've been implanted. I see my brother, standing over him, a clipboard in his hand. He is calmly taking notes. _What is this?_

"Caleb!" I call to him.

He walks over to me. "You shouldn't be here."

"What is this?"

"I tried to tell you, but you didn't have time to listen. It's the Aggression serum. We're testing it on the Divergents that were captured today."

"From Abnegation? Are you crazy? How can you do this?"

"You shouldn't be here." He repeats again.

"Caleb, listen I need your help…" As quickly as possible, I tell him about Four and out parents. He looks appalled.

"I'm sorry, but I can't help you."

"What? Caleb, you're my brother."

"Faction before blood, Beatrice. We both made our choices."

"But Caleb, this isn't you." I search his eyes, trying to find some trace of the brother I had known.

He sighs. "It is now. There's no going back for me. If you leave now, before anybody else sees you, I won't tell them you were here."

I want to try to convince him one more time, but the look on his face tells me it will be useless. I can't waste any more time here.

"I love you, Caleb." I tell him, but I hear no reply as I walk away.

Now there is only one place I can go, and it is dangerous. I head back to my room. I stuff my Dauntless clothes into my backpack. I pause, and grab the disk with Four's message program. I hurry toward the atrium, without looking back. Mercifully, there is no one around to question my leaving. I jump onto the train, and quickly change clothes. My breath catches as I pull the sweater over my head. It smells like Four, and I have to fight to keep what's happened out of my head. I want to surrender to it, to drown in my own guilt and sorrow, but I know that if I do, all is lost. I have to keep fighting for as long as I can. I near Dauntless and jump from the train. I carefully follow the same path I followed the evening before, to avoid the cameras. I have no plan for what I'll do when I get there. My only hope is to find Shauna or Zeke and throw myself on their mercy.

When I enter Dauntless, I pass only a few people and none of them take any notice of me. I try to remember where Four's apartment was, but all the hallways look the same. As I'm making my way slowly down yet another identical hall, suddenly I'm grabbed from behind and pulled into a recess.

"What are you doing here?" It's Zeke. "Where's Four?"

I'm so relieved to have found him that the tears welling up almost overflow. "It's bad, Zeke." I whisper.

"C'mon, my mom's place is up ahead."

We get inside, and I sit down at the table. His mother hands me a glass of water, but I don't drink it.

"You're lucky it was me in the control room tonight." Zeke tells me. "Anybody else and you'd have been caught."

"I need your help. I did something terrible"

"Tell me."

I don't spare myself. It's not the Dauntless way. I tell him everything.

When I'm done, Zeke asks me if I know how to handle a rifle. I shake my head no. He looks to his mom. "We're going to go get him. Can I take Uriah?"

"I think you have to." She replies.

"How will we get into Erudite?" Uriah asks.

"I know a way." I tell him.

Zeke nods. "Uriah, go get Shauna, tell her to bring as many guns as she can find."

I allow myself to feel a moment of relief that they are willing to help me. It only brings on tears, though.

"Don't cry, Tris. Stay strong." He tells me.

"This is my fault." I tell him, wiping away the tears.

"None of that matters. We'll get him back."

I nod. Zeke's mother sits down across from us.

"Listen, when you find him – don't come back here, it's not safe." She pauses for a moment. "Take him to Amity - to my friend Katrina. She'll help you. I'll come later."

"Thank you..." I realize I don't know her name.

"It's Hana." She smiles. "And you're Tris?"

"Actually it's Beatrice."

She stares at me for a moment, puzzled, but says nothing.

Just then, Uriah returns with Shauna. Zeke hands me a knife and a pistol, and the others arm themselves with with as many weapons as they can carry.

Zeke looks around at us expectantly. "Ready?"

"Ready." We reply.

 **A/N As always, I appreciate your suggestions and comments. Thanks for reading.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	34. Chapter 34 Austere and Lonely Offices

_From Four's Perspective_

Now that I'm alone, in a cell in Erudite, I finally surrender to the pain and the complete terror that I've been feeling. Here's where you learn a secret about me, something nobody knows - not even Tris. She thought I was like her - Divergent. And I am, to a point. But I'm pretty sure she assumed part of that mix was Dauntless like her, but it's not. I'm an imposter. The Legendary Four, they called me, and I'm not even Dauntless at all. I'm Abnegation, with a bit of Erudite thrown in. That's it. What that means, in practical terms, is that I can only be brave for other people. Now that I'm alone, I'm defenseless, and I can't fight any of it.

After Tris left me, Eric and the others tied me to a chair, facing Marcus. They were convinced he knew the location of the rest of the Divergents. He was no longer the man I'd remembered in my fear landscapes. They'd been torturing him for hours. He had no fingernails left. They'd started pulling out his teeth with pliers. They said he'd been unusually resistant to the torture, despite having tested negative for Divergence. His mouth full of blood, Marcus had declared, defiantly, that Jeanine had never understood the strength of the Abnegation. This had only earned him another punch.

So they decided to torture me, in front of Marcus. "We'll skip the pliers and go straight to the fun stuff, shall we?" Eric had said. He slid a pair of brass knuckles over his already blood-spattered fingers and punched me in the gut, hard. I refused to cry out. I refused to give Eric or Marcus the satisfaction. In truth, I welcomed the pain. At least for a short while, it drowned out the guilt I felt over Tris' parents, and the agony of the visceral wound Tris' betrayal and left in me. How could I have been so stupid? The minute she stepped back onto that elevator, I knew. She never loved me. And Marcus, who also never loved me, would have no problem letting them torture me.

Eric wound up again, preparing to punch me.

But Marcus did stop him. "Wait. I'll tell you."

With this, Jeanine had brightened considerably. "I knew this would work."

Part of me was relieved, but I had no real illusions about ever leaving Erudite alive. I think maybe I'd have preferred to just die then. It's hard to say, though, and it's getting hard to think - harder to _breath_ , even, by the minute.

Marcus had continued. "It's true we were hiding Divergents, but only a few, and we certainly weren't breeding them, not intentionally, anyways."

"You're lying," hissed Jeanine. Eric then hit me in the head, leaving my ears ringing. "Don't kill him, Eric," she'd warned him.

"We traced transmissions to your house ten years ago, Marcus. We've known about you for a long time."

"It was Evelyn."

"Impossible. Evelyn is dead." Eric had punched me again, this time in the back - my kidney. The pain was searing, blinding.

"Stop!" Marcus had yelled. "Evelyn isn't dead. She's alive. I helped her fake her own death."

I can see Jeanine is intrigued. "Why would you do that?"

Marcus had begun talking, his eyes on me all the while. "She was Divergent. Bred by the society. As cruel and calculating as they come. I only knew that later, though. She never wanted to marry me, but they sent her to Abnegation to hide her, and I was part of her cover. I loved her, but she despised me. She shrank from my touch." He looks away from me then, but forces himself to meet my eyes again. "Tobias was practically a miracle. And she hated him. She hated him because he bound her further to me and to Abnegation, and because he wasn't Divergent. In her eyes, he was inferior. She took a lover. He was the leader of the factionless Divergent. She became pregnant by him. When she told me what she had done, and that she was leaving me, I concocted the story about her dying in childbirth. She had had a friend, Natalie Prior – at least, she had pretended they were friends – and Natalie helped me cover it all up. She went away, and after that it was just me and Tobias." His voice had trailed off, sadly, at this last statement. At that moment, I had sensed he felt regret.

Marcus regained his composure, and the authoritative voice I had remembered. "Tell me Jeanine, have you intercepted any more transmissions, since she died?"

"This is a fascinating story," Jeanine had said, "but you have no proof. A far simpler explanation is that you found a more covert means of communication." Eric had punched me again then, this time my face exploded into a thousand points of white-hot light.

As much as I'd hated Marcus, right then I had felt only pity. I surprised myself. I struggled to find the words through the pain. "No, it's true." I had said. "I've _seen_ her."

Jeanine turned to me. "Where is she?

"I don't know." I could hear Eric pull back, about to punch, but Jeanine had stopped him. "You're going to kill him." She grabbed the pliers. "I'll do it myself."

She took my hand in hers, almost gently. Unlike Eric's, her hands were clean – manicured, even. "You need to tell me where she is, Four." Her calm whisper had made her infinitely more terrifying than Eric.

"I don't know."

She had sighed with annoyance. Then she fastened the pliers to the nail on my left forefinger. In contrast to Eric, her actions were clinical, rather than savage – perfunctory, even. She looked me straight in the eyes. Then she pulled, and, blessedly, for a moment, the world disappeared.

It didn't last, though. I came to, dripping from the glass of water she'd thrown in my face.

I try again. "I don't know. She always met me on the train."

I wait for the pliers, but they don't come.

"This is a fine mess," Jeanine had hissed to Eric. "Go back to Dauntless and tell them the bombers are hiding with the Factionless. Send them in. See if you find anything."

"What should I do with these two? Kill them?" Eric had been all too eager.

But Marcus had protested. "Not my son. None of this is his fault. I'll do anything you ask."

Jeanine had only sighed loudly. "They might still be useful. Put them in holding cells. Separate holding cells."

After that, I was brought here. The floor is white, the ceiling and walls are white. An awful, blinding, Erudite white. Eric threw me on the floor, and I can't get up. My legs don't work. It's cold. I don't know how long I've been lying here. Maybe minutes, maybe days. I try to tell myself that Tris was only playacting in Jeanine's office, and that right now she and Zeke are planning my escape. I'll see her again. Touch her. An image of her swims blurrily in front of me. She is in my arms, laughing, giving herself to me. Maybe it _was_ real. I find no comfort, though. The thought of Tris just makes me ache from the wanting of her. None of this matters. I can't see out of one of my eyes. I can tell I'm bleeding inside from Eric's blows to my head and kidney. I'm going to die here, alone and afraid.

 **A/N As always, I appreciate your suggestions and comments. This one was hard to write. Thanks for reading. The title is a reference to Robert Hayden's "Those Winter Sundays". Many thanks to triseat0n for her very helpful critique.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	35. Chapter 35 The Rescue

We arrive outside of Erudite, but the entrance to the passageway is difficult to find in the dark. I almost trip over the handle to the door, embedded in the ground. I silently thank God that the Guardian had showed me this tunnel. The passage is longer than I remember it from before, and cold - filled with cobwebs, and who knows what else. I wonder when it was last used. Finally we reach the door to the library. I open it slowly.

"I had a heck of a time figuring out which side you were on, Beatrice." It's Arnold, and he's been waiting for me. I freeze. He smiles. "But the minute I saw you back at Dauntless, I knew you were on the right side."

I exhale. "How did you know?"

Arnold shrugs. "I told you. I watch people, I figure things out. This is the only way into Erudite that's not monitored – and I knew you'd been in the library, talking to the Guardian. None of this matters, though. Listen, you don't have much time - twenty minutes tops before the cameras all come back on."

My mind is spinning, but I can't believe my good luck. "Why are you helping us?"

"It was Eric who planted the bomb at Dauntless. I saw it all. And Eric fed them all aggression serum. It was in the beer. That's why they killed so many when they attacked Abnegation. Jeanine engineered everything to get to Marcus and the Divergents"

It all makes sense now, but I know I need to focus. "Do you know where Four is?"

"In the first holding cell on level 5." He presses a disk key into my hand. "Hurry."

I pause for a moment. "Arnold – one more thing. My brother – can you help him? Get him out of here? We're going to Amity."

Arnold smiles, "I'll do what I can. Now go."

I lead Zeke, Uriah, and Shauna to the elevator, and we make our way to the holding cell. Our boots echo loudly in the hall, and I fear we'll be discovered, but we pass only a few guards on the way. My companions dispatch them quickly and silently, slitting their throats. There's no going back now. There never was, though. I get to the cell that Arnold had indicated, and say another prayer that the disk key will work. It does.

The door opens, but I am not prepared for what I see. Four is alive, barely. He is lying on the floor. There is blood, staining the white floor a violent red. His jaw is broken and his face is swollen almost to unrecognizability. I'm not sure if he's even aware of our presence. Zeke pushes his way into the cell, past me, and without pause bends to lifts Four onto his back in a fireman's carry.

I can tell Zeke is worried, but he says only one word. "Run."

We do as he says, and, miraculously, we make it back to the library without encountering any other guards. As I close the door leading from the hall to the library, I hear Shauna's voice behind me.

"That was way too easy." She warns.

"This is Erudite, not Dauntless." Uriah counters.

The words are barely out of his mouth, though, when a shot is fired, just missing my head. I don't know where it's coming from, but the others quickly take a defensive position, behind a high bookcase, and I follow them.

I can see that there are five of them. They are across the gallery, shielded by the library railing. A firefight begins. Four is on the floor, and I go to him. I put my hand under his head, and he stirs, briefly. His eyes are unfocused, and I can't tell if he recognizes me. I take his hand, and am shocked at how cold it is.

"Four, it's me. Tris. Be strong. I love you. I didn't mean for this to happen." I am desperate.

Moments later, the sound of gunfire subsides.

"Did we get them all?" Uriah asks.

"Maybe." Zeke says, warily.

Shauna reaches over and takes Four's wrist, feeling for his pulse. "We need to get him out of here."

Zeke turns, and at that moment, Eric rounds the corner.

I watch it all happen, in slow motion. Eric sees Four, lying on the floor, and takes aim. Zeke fires his rifle as he leaps in front of Four, blocking Eric's shot with his own body. Zeke and Eric both fall. Shauna runs to Zeke. I see Eric's hand reaching for his gun. I grab Zeke's knife from his boot and throw it, hitting Eric's arm.

Shauna screams to me. "Go. Now."

I start to stand, but look back at Four. Uriah is carrying him now, and Shauna is behind him. I'm confused.

"Where's Zeke?" I ask.

"Dead," she says.

I open my mouth to speak, but Shauna stops me. "Don't you dare cry. Four is _dying_. We have to get him out of here. It's what Zeke would want. Go."

I look back at Uriah. He is silent, his face resolute. I nod, and start making my way down to the passage. We race headlong through the dark tunnel. When we get outside, Uriah all but collapses. Awkwardly, He drops Four to the ground, and gasps for air. Shauna checks his pulse once again. "How is he?" I ask.

Uriah and Shauna share a brief glance, then she turns to me. "Not good. He won't make it to Amity."

"What about Dauntless?" Uriah asks.

"We don't know who's running Dauntless now." Shauna replies.

I am frantic. We've come so far, and we've already lost Zeke. I can't lose Four. I can't lose him. I realize that there is only one place I can take him.

"I know where we can go. C'mon."

 **A/N As always, I appreciate your suggestions and comments. Sorry this is a short one. Thanks for reading.**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	36. Chapter 36 Adu Aduyi Hooweh Ssadikki

_From Uriah's Perspective._

My muscles are burning, and I'm reminded of what happened in the training room only a few days earlier. It seems like a long time ago, though. Four saved me then, taking a beating at Eric's hands. He has protected me in other ways, too. It's only fitting that I am saving him now, carrying him on my back. I know it's what Zeke would have wanted. My heart contracts at the thought of him. I quickly push away thoughts of my brother. It's too painful. Instead, I try to concentrate on the mission. This is what we do. We're Dauntless.

We managed, somehow, between the three of us, to hoist Four onto the train with us. He had moaned, briefly, when his body hit the floor, but had lost consciousness again shortly after. We had left our rifles behind. We couldn't carry them and Four at the same time. Now we're walking through the factionless district, armed with only our pistols and knives, and with no idea what is coming next.

"C'mon, I think it's up ahead." Tris urges us.

We approach a tall concrete building, partially burnt out. It looks uninhabited, and I start to wonder if perhaps Tris has lost her mind. Zeke trusted her though, so I trust her. I have no other choice.

She bangs on the door, frantically, and to my surprise, after a few minutes, it opens. Two men come out, dressed in rags but carrying rifles. Tris wastes no time. "This is Tobias Eaton. Evelyn's son. You have to help him. Please help him." Without any further questions, one of the men waves his hand, and four more men appear, and they lift Four from my shoulders. We follow them as they carry him down a dimly lit hallway. We pass through a set of double doors, and I am shocked to find a gleaming white, brand-new tiled floor on the other side of them. As I glance around me, I see that everything here is new, and modern. It looks like a hospital. How could the factionless have built this, and why?

They carry Four into a small examining room and place him on a stretcher. There are doctors here. They start to examine him, using scanners that look much more sophisticated than what we have in the infirmary at Dauntless. Tris doesn't want to let go of his hand, but Shauna and I pull her away. I only catch some of what the doctors are saying, but it doesn't sound good.

"… His left pupil is blown."

"…Abdomen is rigid…"

At that moment, a woman arrives. She is tall, with dark hair and olive skin. She is dressed in the clothes of the factionless, but they are cleaner, less torn. She hurries to Four's side.

"Oh my God. Tobias." She strokes his hair. "My sweet boy." Four stirs for a moment, moaning, and I'm relieved that he's still alive. I struggle to understand what's going on, though. Zeke told me once that Four's mother had died when he was young. Who could this woman be, then? I know very little about him. I never even knew his real name until now. I think of my own mother, and of the news I'll be bringing her soon, if we survive. How will I find the words?

This woman who has come appears to be in some position of authority here, and the doctors defer to her. "Will he live?" she demands. "Yes. Probably," One tells her. "But he needs surgery - now." She nods, and they wheel Four's stretcher out of the room and down the hall. I move to follow it, but Shauna takes my arm and briefly shakes her head, then tilts her head toward Tris. Her back is against the wall and she is slowly sinking to the floor, shaking. The woman crosses over to her and lifts her off the floor with one hand, helping her to a chair. She scrutinizes Tris with concern.

"Tell me what happened." The woman's voice has a rough, unpleasant edge to it.

"It's my fault."

The woman waves her hand dismissively. "Just tell me what happened."

Tris begins to speak, filling in details I had not heard before. How she had been in Dauntless when the attack happened. How Four had sent her home, and how Jeanine had talked her into bringing Four to Erudite.

"I don't understand, Jeanine was letting you seeing him? She _knew?_ "

"Yes." Tris lowers her eyes – her voice is almost a whisper. "I was supposed to be spying on him."

The woman's eyes flash with anger at hearing this. "And _were_ you spying on him? Keeping tabs on him for Jeanine?"

"No." Tris is emphatic. "Not _really_. I… just went along with it."

Tris says nothing about her parents or the slaughter of the Abnegation. It must be too painful. I feel the loss of Zeke, viscerally, but I force the feelings away.

"Tell me what happened when you took him to Erudite."

Tris tells her about seeing Marcus and realizing that Jeanine had lied to her. Then she describes how she ran to Dauntless for help and found us. Tris seems to know this woman, and calls her Evelyn. I want to know where we are and what is going on here, but I don't interrupt. The questioning continues.

"And how were you able to get into his cell?"

Tris explains about the man who helped us in the library, and tells Evelyn that the Erudite have had the other factions under surveillance.

"And he just decided to help you?"

"He saw Eric plant the bomb in Dauntless. He realized that Jeanine had been behind it all." A trace of defensiveness creeps into Tris' voice. "Not all the Erudite are bad people."

"And so you escaped, and brought him here?"

"Yes." Tris sighs, wiping her face with the sleeve of her sweater. It's far too long on her, and I realize it must be Four's. "Can I go with him?"

Evelyn smiles, and I can see that she was once beautiful. I sense something else in that smile as well, though. I can't put my finger on it, but it feels almost... threatening. "Tobias is in good hands. You were smart to bring him here. Now, what else you can tell me? When you saw Marcus in Jeanine's office, did you hear him speak?"

"No, they had been torturing him, but they said he wouldn't talk." Her breath hitches. "That's why they wanted Four."

With this, Evelyn exhales.

"And did Jeanine ever tell you anything else about her hunt for the Divergents?"

"Only that she thought the Abnegation were sheltering them."

Again, Evelyn seems relieved at hearing Tris' words.

"Alright. You three should get some rest." She crosses the room to a panel in the wall. She presses a button, and speaks into it. "I need an escort for our guests."

She turns around, and fixes Tris again with the same awful smile. "They'll take you and get you cleaned up and fed. When Tobias is out of surgery, you can see him."

"Thank you Evelyn."

Shauna and I are so fixated on the exchange between Tris and Evelyn, that we don't notice that now we're surrounded. I must have been more tired than I realized. Zeke would have never made a mistake like this. There are at least twenty of them, and they are armed with rifles. One of them pulls my pistol from the back of my waistband. I still have a knife, but I don't dare try to reach for it. I glance at Shauna and see her making the very same calculation. Tris however, is beyond all rational thought.

"What is this?" she screams at Evelyn.

Evelyn's face hardens as she crosses her arms in front of her. Her voice is full of hate, now, but also strangely, horribly calm. " _You_ are an Erudite spy, by your own admission. You led my son into a trap so that he could be tortured, by your own admission. I can only assume that it was guilt that moved you to bring him to me now. For that alone, I'm going to let you live. But if you ever come back here – if you ever tell anyone about what you have seen, I will kill all three of you. Slowly. You will never see Tobias again. Never."

With that, she waves to her guards, and they start to lead us away, back down the hallway from which we had entered. Tris is hysterical, screaming and clawing at them. They drag her down the hall behind us. When we reach the outer door, another guard grabs her ankles, and they throw her out onto the street, and shove me and Shauna toward her with the ends of their rifles. The doors slam shut behind us, and I can hear them being bolted.

Tris scrambles to her feet and throws herself at the door, kicking and clawing. She screams until she is spent, and finally collapses at the base of the door. Blood runs freely from her knuckles.

I look to Shauna. "We have to get out of here." She nods, and kneels down next to Tris.

"We have to go, it's not safe here. We have to go to Amity."

"I can't leave him."

"You _have_ to. He would want us to keep you safe." She pauses for a moment, fighting back her own tears. "At least he's _alive._ "

This seems to bring Tris around. She stands and wipes the tears from her face with the heel of her hand. "Alright. Let's go."

 **A/N As always, I appreciate your suggestions and comments. Thanks for reading. The title is Arabic, and means "My enemy's enemy is my friend". Of course, even the most casual student of history will know that this is almost never true, sadly. Only two more chapters to go, after this one. I already have an outline for book 2, though. It will be called Memento Mori. Thank you triseat0n for your helpful critique!**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	37. Chapter 37 Two Little Boys

_From Shauna's perspective_

We are all silent on the train to Amity. Uriah stands by the window, his back to us, looking out over the landscape as it speeds by. Tris is on the floor, in a corner, wrapped in a black sweater that I recognize now as Four's. It makes her look even smaller than she already is. Her eyes are closed, but she is rocking back and forth slightly, and I can see her lips moving in some sort of prayer. It sounds like the same prayer she and Four had said together when he taught her how to throw a knife.

I have no such comforts. Zeke is gone. I loved him, though I never told him. It wasn't that kind of relationship. I struggle to wrap my head around the idea that he's dead. I keep expecting to hear him laugh, but I know I won't. I held him and watched as the life slipped from his eyes. It only took a second. He hadn't wanted to hold us up. Zeke died a soldier's death, saving his friend's life. I know that's the only way he'd have ever wanted to go. He'd have done it for any one of us, without hesitation - but I know he'd have been glad it was Four.

He loved Four. I can almost see him, the last time he and Four sparred, telling him so. I never understood why, though. Zeke was so generous with his friendship – for him it was always more than that, always _love_ , but Four never let anyone in. Even when Four was training me, for hours every night, I know I never even scratched the surface. It bothered me, but it never bothered Zeke. He didn't need anything in return. I stop myself, knowing I'm being unfair. I was jealous of their bond. Zeke told me once that Four had done something for his family, something that saved them – and that it had been dangerous. If Four had been caught, he'd have been killed. He never told me what it was, though. And now I'll never now.

I glance back at Tris. She looks so fragile. Listening to her tell Four's mother everything that had happened, it was hard to believe that she had borne it all, but she had. I know she must feel terrible guilt, and I try to think of something to say to her, but everything that comes to mind sounds pointless and inadequate.

"We're here." Uriah says. His voice is flat and tired.

We jump from the train, and find ourselves in a field. It's almost dawn, and the Amity are already out working. Tris leads the way, silently. When we reach someone, a young man in a red checked shirt and straw hat, she says, simply, "We're looking for Katrina."

He squints at her and points toward an enormous oak tree in the distance.

I glance at Uriah, filled with apprehension, but he just nods, and we both follow Tris. We're too tired to think. When we get to the tree, I see there is a door, hidden in the trunk. It opens, and a tall, dark-skinned woman beckons us inside. "I'm Katrina. Come." We descend a narrow, winding staircase, carved into the earth and tree roots. It feels suffocating, though there is plenty of air to breath. We follow her down a long hallway, which finally opens into a larger gallery. To my relief, Hana is there. Uriah rushes to her, and she embraces him. She studies me and Tris carefully. Then she turns back to Uriah.

"Zeke?" Uriah shakes his head. He doesn't need to say the words. Hana closes her eyes in pain, but makes no sound. After a moment, she opens them again. "And Four?"

This time, I answer. "Alive… we think. He was hurt. We took him to his mother."

Surprise registers on Hana's face. "His mother is alive?"

I nod. "She's with the factionless now," I tell her.

Hana goes to Tris now, putting her hand on her cheek. "I'm surprised you let them bring you here without Four."

"She sent us away. I told her what happened." whispers Tris, but Hana shushes her, and pulls two envelopes from her pocket.

"When I saw you, I knew you looked familiar. I didn't figure out who you were, though, until after you'd gone." She places the envelopes in Tris' hands. "These are from your mother. She and Katrina were my closest friends, growing up in Dauntless. She wrote the first one before she left for Abnegation, and made me promise to give it to you if you chose Dauntless. The second one came about nine years ago. I've never opened them." Tris nods quietly and puts them in her pocket.

Hana turns to speak to all three of us now. "We're safe here, for now at least. Go and get some sleep. I'll explain more later."

We're each led to alcoves, carved out of the earth, and lined with mattresses and linens. I wish I were back in the stone fortress of Dauntless. I wish Zeke were with me. Uriah climbs up and lies on his back, his hands behind his head, looking straight up. Tris faces the wall, with her knees to her chest, and doesn't move. I climb into mine last. I don't expect to sleep, but mercifully, I soon fall into a deep, dreamless slumber.

I wake to find Uriah shaking me, gently. "It's time", he says. I rise without speaking, and cross over to the other side of the room to wake Tris. She comes to with a start, looking around her as if she's trying to understand where she is. "We're going to say goodbye to Zeke," I tell her.

She follows me out to the clearing, and we find Uriah, Hana, and Katrina around a small fire. I dread this, but I know it has to happen tonight - it's our tradition to say goodbye to a fallen soldier before the next sunrise. Dauntless funerals don't involve burials. For us, the body is only a shell, and when life leaves it, it becomes worthless – something to be discarded. Still, it pains me to think of him, lying alone in the Erudite library, next to Eric. I want to hate Eric, and I want to take strength from that hatred, but my sorrow overpowers every other feeling I have.

Out here in Amity, with no City lights, the stars are incredibly bright. They seem closer, somehow. Katrina holds Hana's hand as she looks up into the night sky. "Goodbye Ezekiel!" Hana shouts. "You were beautiful, my darling sweet boy!" Uriah follows, bidding farewell to his brother, as loudly as he can, sending it upward into the heavens. Tris is quieter, thanking him for saving Four. I am last. I have only one thing to say. I take a deep breath, filling my lungs with the night air. It stings, but I don't care.

"I love you Zeke!" I make it as loud as I possibly can, so he'll hear it. "I. Love. You!"

Uriah turns to Hana. "Will you sing it, Mama?

She smiles, softly, but shakes her head. "No baby, I can't."

"I'll do it, then." He closes his eyes for a moment, steadying himself.

Uriah's voice is sweet and true as he sings, and the words float out across the starlit field. " _Two little boys, had two little toys…"_ I know the words well, but I don't join in. This was Zeke and Uriah's song – Zeke told me once that Hana used to sing it to them. Like all Dauntless lullabies, it's about war, and bravery – and the bonds among soldiers. When the two boys in the song were children together, one of the boys helped the other mend his broken toy, and later on, when the other is lying wounded on the battlefield, his friend remembers, and saves his life. My heart aches at hearing it, but I keep listening, for Zeke's sake.

 _"…_ _When we grow up, we'll both be soldiers, and our rifles will not be toys."_ At this, Uriah's voice breaks slightly, but he wills himself to continue. "… _I wonder if we'll remember when we were two little boys…"_

 **A/N As always, I appreciate your suggestions and comments. Thanks for reading. My UK readers will know that 'Two Little Boys" is a real song. There are many versions, but the one I know sounds most like (but not exactly like) Sinead O'Connor's version, you can find a video of her singing it as an encore if you search the internets. I sing this song to my own sons, actually, but I only sing them the first verse – they are still two little boys.**

 **Thank you triseat0n for your helpful critique!**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


	38. Chapter 38 Hamartia

It's a clear, cold night, but I'm wearing Four's sweater, and I don't feel the chill as I sprint across the field towards the train track. I know I'll never outrun the guilt I feel over what I've done, but the feel of the wind on my face and in my hair is a small kind of release. The train is comes, and I reach up, grab the handle, and throw myself inside. I've done it a dozen times, at least.

This time there's nobody waiting for me. The car is lit, dimly, and I sit down on the floor, pulling my mother's letters from my pocket. I take a deep breath, and open the first one. My heart contracts at the sight of her handwriting.

 _"_ _Dear child…"_ it begins, just as my father's had. The contents are similar as well, explaining her decision to leave Dauntless and join Abnegation with my father. It contains nothing about the society, though, only a more general warning to hide my divergence. Some of the letter is specific to Dauntless, for example, she warned me about the fear simulations. _"…_ _Be sure to hide the fact that you are aware while you are in them."_

The second letter is far more shocking. It's addressed specifically to me, and I see it was written on the day of Evelyn's funeral. The script is not my mother's typical hand – it appears cramped and rushed.

 _Dear Beatrice,_

 _If you are reading this, it means that you have joined Dauntless._ _You are only seven now, but I sense in you an adventurous spirit, one you will find was inherited from me._ _I'm writing this letter because I've just found out something terrible, and if you choose Dauntless, you could be in danger, and I may not be alive to tell you the things you need to know._ _Yesterday Evelyn came to me with a confession._ _She told me she had a lover, a factionless man, and had become pregnant._ _I was sympathetic, at first, thinking she had acted out of love._ _That was not the case._ _She went on to explain her motives, and what she told me filled me with terror._

 _She told me that when the founders created the faction system, they wished to prevent another war, and therefore chose to bar the Divergents from the city._ _There were left to die of thirst, many of them begging and pleading for mercy, outside the Fence._ _This was not, however, the end of the Divergents._ _A small handful managed to hide their identities, and were permitted into the City._ _Most joined Erudite, where they were celebrated for their advanced intellect, and where they managed to hide their violent nature._

 _Angered by the treatment of the banished Divergents, they made a solemn vow to work, through successive generations, to bring about the destruction of the factions, and, when their numbers were great enough, to take control of the City and to banish or enslave its non-Divergent inhabitants._

 _Evelyn told me that she was a descendent of these Divergents, and that its members, since the beginning, had selectively married and procreated so as to maintain their genetic alterations and to grow their numbers._ _She told me the day of the Divergent revolution was drawing near._

 _I had known her marriage to Marcus had been arranged, and I knew she was unhappy, but she told me then that she had not chosen Abnegation for herself._ _She had been ordered to choose it by the others, so that she would be hidden and protected there._ _She was also ordered to marry Marcus._ _She said she had failed with Tobias – that she had never intended to have a child with Marcus._ _Her lover was also a descendent of the society, and that this child she carried was therefore 'special'._ _She told me Marcus had discovered her infidelity, and that she felt she and the child would be in danger._ _She had therefore decided to leave to join the factionless, to protect her child._

 _I was shocked, of course, but also confused._ _Why was she choosing now to trust me with these terrible secrets?_ _I don't know how, but she had sensed our Divergence, and was convinced that it was our duty to leave with her and to join the factionless Divergent._ _She was particularly interested in you, Beatrice, saying that she sensed you had the combination of aggression paired with intellect that the society valued the most._ _She was genuinely shocked that I refused to listen to her, and refused to consider joining her and the others._ _She begged and pleaded with me – it went on for several hours._ _Finally I screamed at her that she was insane._ _It was then that I saw her for what she truly was – cruel and calculating – pure evil._ _She told me that she had taken a great risk in trusting me, and that if I ever breathed a word about this to anyone, she would find out, and kill us all._ _I will never forget the look on her face as she said these words._ _I believed her._

 _She also made me promise to help Marcus cover up her disappearance, and in truth I thought it would be best for us, especially, Tobias, if she were dead._ _I pray that I will never see her again, but my greatest fear is for you._

 _Beatrice, this is important._ _If you join Dauntless, I fear she will find out, and she will believe you are one of them._ _She will find you and try to persuade you to join them._ _She can be charming, she fooled me for years, but you must not allow yourself to be fooled._ _She will offer you protection from those who hunt the Divergent, but she will destroy you, and herself, in the end._

The letter stops there, abruptly, and I have no idea what, if anything she had planned to write next. My hands are shaking. I had delivered Four to Jeanine to be tortured, and in saving him, I had caused Zeke's death, and had put Four into the hands of someone even more dangerous than Jeanine.

I look back over everything that has happened, every decision I made, with new eyes. I ask myself, at every turn, would I have acted differently, had I known? If I had stayed in Erudite that night, I would never have met Four, and would never have lured him to Erudite. Would he have been safe, then? No, I decide. If Eric had not killed him first, Jeanine would have found another way to get to him. And if that had happened, no one would ever have known about it. There would have been no one to rescue him. Four would have died, instead of Zeke. But which was the right outcome? Does that question even have any meaning?

I'm tired and numb and I can't think anymore. I lay down on the cold floor of the train, on my side. I rest my head on my arm. I don't expect to sleep, but slowly I am lulled by the rocking of the train. I dream of Four, of course. He breaks my fall at the top of the Ferris wheel, and holds me tightly against his own body. I had loved him even then, though I hadn't recognized or understood it.

When I wake, though I know it is selfish, I find I cannot regret having climbed that Ferris wheel. If I hadn't taken him to the factionless, he'd have died in my arms on the train to Amity. Even now, I can't even be sure that he _is_ alive. I _feel_ that he is, though. The sun is rising now, and I can see, with absolute clarify, what I have to do. No matter what it takes, I will find him. I will save him.

 **A/N Thank you so much for all of your support as I wrote this. There will be another book (a sequel), it will be called 'Memento Mori'. I probably need to take a break for a bit, though, and I also want to revise some of the chapters in this book. Because the story changed, dramatically, while I was writing it, there are some continuity issues. I'd also like to make the first few chapters a bit more interesting. It's difficult, of course, because the heart of the story is Tris and Four, but I don't want to bring him in any sooner than chapter 7 when Tris first sees him from the Watchers. I welcome any suggestions along those lines (or any other!). Because I may not start book 2 for a bit, I will tell you one more thing: The first chapter will be called 'The Art of Losing Yourself', and will be narrated by Tobias. So yes, he's alive, of course :)**

 **Thank you triseat0n for your helpful critique!**

Standard Disclaimer: All rights to Divergent and its characters belong to Veronica Roth.


End file.
